Bursting and Building - Chapter 46 - sugarblossom (2024)

Chapter Text

“You are being unreasonable .”

Whitty froze in place as the cold dagger that was Updike’s voice pierced through the hallway. There was a moment of intense muttering, a comparison of degradation, a warning of disobedience. Whitty rested against the nearest TGG wall, furrowing his imaginary eyebrows as Updike snapped, “You do not understand the sheer scope of how many you would require to replace me.”

After some more deliberating muttering and an icy thank you from Updike, the click of an ending video call rang out, drenching him in silence.

Gulping, Whitty shuffled over to Updike’s office door and gave it a knock.

Updike threw the door open a moment later, gracefully leaning against the doorframe. “How may I help you, Whitty?”

Whitty’s gaze darted towards Updike’s conference laptop before at Updike’s storm cloud hair. “Oh, Bee sends his regards, and I was in the area so I also wanted to see how you were doin’. What… was that?”

After skimming through his phone schedule and security feeds, Updike dropped his unwavering glare to the ground. “My superiors are quite displeased with my changes.” Whitty watched Updike gripping the crook of his arm as his rants grew colder. “The expectations and reactions of upper management are abhorrent . Like bloody hell, they think I am willing to disclose my employees’ information as a bargaining chip? They jest . I’ll drag out the bloody labour laws and take the case to whatever you call an employment tribunal over here if I gotta.” Updike took a deep breath, crossing his arms and prying his chin back up as if distilling his voice back to formality. “Pardon. If I am required to. But regardless, as the leader of this task force, it is my problem alone.”

Whitty stayed silent. He reached a hand out towards Updike’s shoulder, to which Updike only sidestepped and continued, “Once again, how may I help you? I… quite appreciate your listening, but if that was all, you are dismissed.”

Rolling his eyes, Whitty echoed Updike’s stance by crossing his arms. “Actually, you could help with my peace of mind. Are you gonna step into yet another containment cell and put your life at risk again anytime soon?”

Updike’s darkening hair betrayed his remorse.

“No, I will not. I do apologise for your concern,” Updike answered, pressing a fist against his lips in thought. “...I did capture another nonhuman-”

“ Already ???” A brief pause later, Whitty bapped his hand against his forehead. “No wait, why am I even surprised. You’re the Gabriel Updike, leader of this task force, of course you did.” Updike stayed silent, folding his arms behind his back. “That was a compliment. Look, I don’t excuse your past actions, but I can’t deny you’re good at what you do. I’m just glad you’re now on our side too.”

Silence ensued.

Whitty exhaled, patting Updike’s shoulder before taking a step back when Updike didn’t react. “You’re also even shyer than Bee sometimes. So you captured another one, what now? Do you want me to accompany you to check on them or somethin’?”

“I… do believe that would be most beneficial, for the both of us, yes.”

“Mhm~” Whitty teased through a hum while Updike shut his office door and led them down to where the containment cells were housed.

This nonhuman didn’t even use the bed provided, choosing instead to curl on the cell floor like an unmoving boulder. Whitty felt a pang of empathy at their silence and ashy gray skin tone.

“Greetings.” Updike stayed stoic when the nonhuman peeked up at the two of them from their corner of the cell but didn’t even comment on Whitty’s presence.

Whitty sat in front of the cell glass, noting how the nonhuman had tucked their limbs under their dull beetle-like shell before honing onto the plate of food on the cell table. “You didn’t finish your food?”

“......No.”

The nonhuman’s fluffy ear tufts swiveled in place when Whitty frowned. “I’m guessin’ you aren’t eatin’ as much as you should be. Gabriel, is this why you brought me along?”

Updike calmly stepped next to Whitty. “I… think they are too paranoid to eat or even sleep much. I do not blame them, at the same time…” He bit his lower lip when the nonhuman further pressed themselves against the back wall. “I just thought your presence would… advocate my worry?”

Unlike the first contained nonhuman, this one had horizontally slitted eyes that narrowed when Whitty sweatdropped regarding what to do. “Um… Ok then. Hey uh- Wait, whoops hold up. You probably already know Gabriel here, but I’m Whitty, nice to meet you! What’s your name?”

After a full minute of awkward silence, the nonhuman rested their head against the edge of their cell wastebasket, displaying their little horn nubs. “It doesn’t f*cking matter.”

“Do you… even have a name?”

The nonhuman gave nothing away. Not words, not expressions. All Whitty could ascertain from their singular spiky gem earring and the countless scattered scars scratched across their shell was that they were too jaded to care.

“In that case…” Updike piped up, tilting his head towards the nonhuman while snapping his fingers. “How about Lambent?”

From where Whitty was sitting, he flicked Updike’s side while wholeheartedly snarking, “How do you and Bee come up with the randomest names for someone? I’ve never heard of ‘Armaros’ before, and now you’re over here with ‘ Lambent ’, wow nice~”

Updike fought the urge to shove at Whitty’s face.

That urge was cut short when the nonhuman actually stood up on all fours to reveal their paws with the tiniest hooked claws poking out. “What kinda fancy name is that . You think I’m a f*cking LAMB ?!” They took a single step towards Updike and Whitty. “I told you not to f*cking BOTHER -”

Whitty shot to his feet when the nonhuman trembled in place like the fuzzy flickering shadows on the cell wall, but it was Updike who raced forward and rested a hand on the glass when they toppled to the side and heaved into the wastebasket.

“What’s up???” Updike blurted, eyes shaking when Whitty yanked him back before holding an arm out in front of him like it was second nature. “Whitty, this is serious!”

The nonhuman gave a small cough, smudging away any sign of their internal suffering with a dry “Yea sure. Call me Lampert or whatever you said. I don’t care.”

By this time, Updike’s stoic facade crumbled. “What happened? Was I wrong about your diet? Should I switch out your food for something fresher? Do you need any nausea medication? Would said medication even work on you??? I truly am not lying when I say I want to help you.”

Lambent curled onto themselves once more, flatly responding, “Good luck with that.”

Updike bit his lower lip at how dangerously complacent they were about their own starvation.

“I think even your food is too fancy. You can’t expect them to transition well knowin’ what I went through,” Whitty said, staring once again at the plate of half finished food, an empathetic toothy grin spreading across his face when despite their exhausted nonchalance, Lambent’s ears twitched in curiosity. “If so, I’ve got this.”

Whitty stepped in front of the cell door. A long hesitant gulp later, Updike pulled out the remote from his hair and let Whitty inside before immediately shutting the door. Although, even though it could be due to Lambent’s current condition, they didn’t seem to care about escaping either…?

Fighting the urge to pace back and forth on the other side of the cell, Updike simply watched as Lambent literally shrank in size for a moment before forcing themselves to poof back up and hiss at Whitty before he could step any closer.

Plopping down on the cell floor, Whitty unceremoniously tossed a burger in front of Lambent.

“Whitty…”

“I’m tryin’ my best, Updike .” Even Lambent sweatdropped as Whitty rubbed at his eyelids before shoving his hands in his pockets. “Ok uh, Lambent was it. I dunno what foods you like or even can eat, so…”

Lambent’s ears folded back in exasperation when Whitty dumped a pile of assorted foods in front of them, from wild mulberries possibly sprayed with pesticide to nut-free salty trail mix packs for Boyfriend to cheap low quality bulk bought biscuits. Updike gave a weak smile at the sheer looney tunes vibes of Whitty pulling out a literal chunk of a cheese wheel.

“Oh have you been drinkin’ enough water? … If you drink water? I’ve got an unopened water bottle, that’s always helped me a bit with my paranoia,” Whitty commented, setting aside said bottle while watching Lambent pawing at some of the food items.

As Lambent made unflinching eye contact while leaning down to munch on fast food lettuce, Whitty awkwardly fiddled with his fingers. He wasn’t really in the mood to go into detail about his past experiences either, especially being so vividly reminded of said past through Lambent, so…

“How the bloody hell do your hoodie pockets work.”

Whitty snapped his gaze back at Updike with a startled laugh. “Oh, Bee might have sewed it, but Gigs, Gf, probably added her own finishin’ touches.”

Updike watched with amusem*nt twinkling in his eyes as Lambent inched closer and full on stole some of Whitty’s hand picked clover flowers dangling from his pockets before huddling back in their little corner of the cell.

Using the hoodie design as an excuse, Updike called Whitty back outside the cell, both of them leaving Lambent in thoughtful silence. Whitty rubbed the nape of his neck before giving Lambent a little wave goodbye before heading out to clear his thoughts; Updike also set up an alarm at Lambent’s cell just in case they needed medical help from eating something they shouldn’t have before turning to leave.

Lambent never said a word.

When Whitty and Updike met back up at the office, the former faceplanted on the couch. “I feel weird.”

“...Make that the two of us. It is… a change I am still grappling with,” Updike admitted, picking at his work gloves with the fervor of a gardener picking weeds. “So… Thanks for your help.” While Updike stepped over and hesitantly patted Whitty on the back, Whitty only metaphorically deflated from the exhaustion of the awkward social interaction. “Would you like to recover here?”

Whitty peeked up at Updike. “In your office? I don’t wanna be a bother.”

“No no, I have a conference to attend soon.” Updike absentmindedly waved a hand, catching a glimpse of his watch. “By soon I mean now.”

Updike sped walked past Whitty with his briefcase of documents. Whitty groaned, faceplanting back against the couch. How does Updike do this? It felt like he just zoned out the past ten minutes of his life, and he didn’t understand why.

Whitty rolled over to face the ceiling, the soft reverb of lo-fight accompanying his confusion.

But… that was a problem for another day.

*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*

The conference room was brimming with bubbling condensation of tension, ready to be popped by Updike saying “I will be taking the pay cuts” as casually as he could have.

Updike’s closest employees were present, trained too well to blurt out their initial thoughts of sheer disbelief, but they all froze in place when processing Updike’s statement. Updike’s mind was also reeling from all of the changes he needed to implement to change the facility (so drastically that his higher-ups induced a revenue downturn no less), but he also remained stoic.

“I do not want to take unnecessary risks or lay anyone off, that being said, I recognize this is an opportunity for us to alter what our job entails. I am financially well off, so I will be taking all of the pay cuts. That is my decision.” Updike scanned the room, taking in all of the familiar faces of long serving employees before trying to be more vulnerable. “This is an enormous change, and true, I am unsure of what the future will provide for me specifically, but the rest of you have no need to worry. I simply wanted to update everyone.”

The silence that followed was shattered by Kokabiel, the head medic, giving an echoing laugh. “Oh f*ck do you live up to your name. Tell you what, it is an opportunity.” Kokabiel grinned, pointing a finger at Updike before flicking at their storm cloud badge. “I’ll take some pay cuts too, I want to see how you handle this.”

Updike didn’t back down when Kokabiel glanced across the room at TGG’s best assassin before focusing back on him.

“I appreciate your input.” Updike met everyone’s gaze with a serious expression, narrowing his eyes when Kokabiel smirked in anticipation. “We are the greater good, no? It is the right thing to do, and I will ensure our success.”

Despite the understandable hesitation from some employees, others settled down in their seats with a nod. Without even Updike’s input, they pitched in to help, coming up with ideas about cutting costs and how to split the financial burden among them.

Updike blinked.

“Wait, I will be taking-”

“Oh believe me, you will still be taking the most substantial pay cut. However, even if I disagree with this course of action, it is only fair I see this through,” one employee cut in before hmphing and glancing off. “We do need you to be able to support yourself. For our sake of course.”

Despite the uncertainty and tension, small giggles broke out as employees teased them for being tsundere.

A warmth buried itself in Updike’s chest, a seedling of hope that entangled its way to survival.

“You guys…” Updike gulped down the cracks in his voice with formality. “I do not anticipate you to accept without demur.”

Grumbles rang out around the room, so Updike took control of the situation, outlining the positive changes and the increased job satisfaction based on his data, how the new roles would help with their growth and benefit them in the future, how there would be novel innovations on how to accomplish said changes. Updike read the room and adapted his pitch on the fly despite hating the pressure - proposing trial project funs with the new facility changes, committing to projects after making sure the team gets the chance to think them over, detailing dependencies and allocating tasks and-

“Whoa…” Everyone whipped around to stare at Whitty poking his head into the room, filling his posture with equal parts terror and embarrassment. “Oh whoops, private meetin’?”

“Ah Whitty, a pleasure,” Updike said, to which Whitty lumbered over, careful not to throw gasoline onto the fire of tension as some employees literally hovered a hand over their hidden weapons. “Everyone, if you have not yet met, this is Whitty…” Pause. “Whitty, what even is your last name? Considering your estrangement from…?”

Whitty hummed in agreement, tapping a hand against his cheek. “The Dearests? I mean, even that isn’t technically a shared surname among the fam.” Whitty adorably squinted in thought. “I don’t think they could officially un adopt me, so I’m still legally… Whitty… Wearest ???”

Updike’s employees didn’t have a clue on how to react.

“I doubt you’re the weariest one here,” Updike instead quipped, to which Whitty finger gunned at him with literal sunglass icons in his eyes. “...Also since when could you do that.”

Giggling, Whitty’s fuse ferociously wagged back and forth. “Oh we so gotta meet up with Bee so we could have a trainin’ montage or somethin’. What do the kids say these days, you ate dat? What’s the future tense, you’re gonna eat dat?”

“...Call Bf if desperation awaits you.” Updike hid a smile as Whitty continued to unintentionally win over some of his employees’… tolerance , as he whipped out his phone and nearly fumbled it to the ground to do just that. “As for the rest of you, this meeting is concluded. Whitty’s presence is at my discretion, and I hope that as we move forward, we will come to an understanding.”

As his employees scattered like ants searching for food, Updike went to check on the new employees with Whitty in tow. Updike skimmed through their progress reports: some put in the minimum amount of effort but still got everything done on time, while others put in the effort to compensate for their job-hopping (were they unreliable, or just replaced?).

“You have not volunteered for any assignments,” Updike commented as he passed by one newbie.

Said employee froze, steeling their expression and rejecting, “I… genuinely won’t be available for the allotted times.”

Updike hummed in affirmation. “Oh I see, my apologies. I must have messed up the scheduling, they are outside of your office hours. Your work has been splendid, so I do hope you enjoy your day off. Here, I could recommend some optional workshops in the meantime for your edification.”

When Updike moved on to assign someone else the task, Whitty watched the employee completely falter in place, question marks popping up around their face as they questioned why Updike didn’t push regarding their excuse and pressure them to take the assignment anyway.

The rest of the newbies were struggling with how to make of Updike as well. Updike was their boss, and he does have his own work, yet he was taking the time to offer them advice about communication and actually following up on his “let me get back to you on this”s when he didn’t know the details for something?

“You aren’t my dad,” one employee grumbled after Updike helped them with their report, cowering when Updike heard the comment and turned around to face them.

“Of course not. TGG members need to trust each other, particularly on missions, but I would not consider my work my family. It is a recipe for exploitation.”

That employee masked their sheer confusion with haughtiness, “Oh, yea??? ”

“...Yes?”

“Well- UM- What about the company health insurance???”

Whitty stepped next to Updike at the commotion, and when the employee fearfully mistook him for a bodyguard here to shut them up, literally sat on the ground next to Updike like an inquisitive toddler.

Updike tilted his head, dangling his phone to the side to emphasize his point, “What about the health insurance? Is the calibre not up to your satisfaction?”

“I- …Why do you have so much for physio? You’ve gotta be exploiting someone , right?”

“You… do realise what type of job you are getting into, correct?” Updike softened when noticing the tears pricking at his employee’s eyelids, absentmindedly dusting lint off of Whitty’s head. “It is not unlimited coverage because I do not want my employees to be reckless with their health, but yes, I believe it is quite necessary.”

The employee stared down at their report, voice quieting. “I don’t understand. It’s because this job requires something like physio so much that I’m… surprised. You aren’t getting… No, I’m sorry, I don’t want to give you any ideas- sorry, forget about it.”

“The money?” Updike dryly finished, daintily putting a hand on the employee’s desk when they winced as confirmation. “At the expense of my employees not getting treatment? Absolutely not. In fact, I take part in analysing our statistics, and I will look into whether the coverage needs to be increased once the company’s financial situation stabilises. My closest employees were willing to take on partial pay cuts to ease mine, so they deserve -”

“What???” the newbie, not yet trained otherwise, blurted, unintentionally startling Whitty so badly he nearly fell over. “‘Pay cuts’??? Why would you - That’s not what bosses do. That is literally not what bosses do.”

Updike uncomfortably paused. “Are… you all alright?”

The employee fell silent for a moment, shuffling their work papers. “May I be excused? I need to go to the bathroom.”

“...You are an adult. You do not need my permission.”

“You would be surprised. But… thank you.”

As the employee hurried past Updike, confusion still visibly haunting their thoughts, Updike only watched with furrowed eyebrows. Whitty propped his chin on the employee’s desk, sweatdropping when Updike shook his head free of his concern and was on the move again. Oh well, back to Updike’s office they go.

Whitty lounged on Updike’s office couch, twiddling his thumbs as Updike started working on his paperwork. “...Sooo, what is your favorite… bird?”

An amused exhale later, Updike’s answer was accompanied by the constant scritching of his pen against paper, “It is a toss-up between swans and doves.”

When only silence followed, Whitty also huffed in amusem*nt at how Updike only answered the question without explaining why. “Are you gonna add a dove drawin’ to your signatures now as well~? Somethin’ somethin’, representin’ peace and the new TGG?”

Updike strangely hesitated. He grabbed his paperwork and clipboard before stepping in front of Whitty. Gaze skittering to the side, Whitty opened his mouth to ask what Updike was doing, only for Updike to reach forward and shush him with a finger.

Point taken, Whitty settled into the comfortable silence. While Updike rested against his side and continued with his paperwork of revamping TGG, Whitty melted a stray piece of glass into putty, kneading in yellow and brown glass shard swirls while cupping it into a marble shape.

Tapping his pen against his mouth, Updike scribbled out plans of housing the most dangerous nonhumans at the center of the facility with the highest level of security, and through rehabilitation, they would work their way to the outer societal circles with decreased security for continued public access, and-

“Snorble.”

“Excuse me, what was that Gabriel?” Whitty laughed, letting his snail marble cool down as Updike heated up instead. “‘Snorble’? I would get it if you said snarble, but snorble ??? That’s adorable.”

“……I have… no clue.”

Whitty turned to Updike, amusem*nt melting like his glass marble when Updike’s hair darkened. “Oh, I’m sorry-”

“It is not this.” Updike gripped his pen, hair lightening just a smudge when Whitty grabbed his hand to loosen said grip. It was only until Whitty gestured for him to continue did Updike explain, “It is also none of your business.”

“Honestly fair enough.” Whitty tossed his marble back and forth, leaning even more against Updike’s side like a headbutting cat. “Although if you do want to vent, I doubt I would… lose my marbles.”

Updike kept his gaze on his paperwork, not even giving Whitty a pity smile. “What, you want to listen to me talking about zoning laws? Regulatory capture? Path dependence? I would hate to confuse you with the jargon.”

“Wouldn’t be the first time, and I’m fine with that.” Silence. “Do you… want to tell me about your higher-ups? You seemed upset earlier.”

Whitty hit the nail right on the head considering Updike immediately rambled with random gestures, “I cannot stand them. They are scared stupid to implement meaningful improvements because it is difficult to justify long-term projects, especially those associated with conservation. Yeah yeah, imperfect information, paralysis by analysis, time value of money and positive time preference, they just don’t want to risk their position for benefits they won’t live to see, so nothing gets done. Like, it is simply a fact that my higher-ups are two or even three times older than me; do they even care what kind of world they leave us with? Am I simply not giving them enough chances???”

The deep-seated pacifist rage simmered against Whitty as he embraced Updike, who continued, “But they don’t want to save you! I understand them being risk averse, I’m literally the leader of the current TGG, but they would kill any nonhuman they deem too dangerous, which is all of you on the sole fact that you are not human!” Updike set down his paperwork on the coffee table, subconsciously hugging Whitty back as if making sure he was alive. “It wasn’t about protection, it was about control , and I’m being pulled between groveling to the senior executive demands and reporting to front line employees. Does the public know how bad it gets? No. So do they see a point in my existence? NO . And I’m USED TO -” Updike cut himself off, burying his face against the living heated blanket that is Whitty, burying his bitter tears to feign indifference. “......Pardon my outburst.”

“I believe it was quite necessary,” Whitty echoed, squishing his cheek against Updike’s hair. “I do appreciate you openin’ up about this, and um… sorry, I dunno what to say-”

“You do not have to say anything.” Updike backed up, hugging himself instead and struggling to make eye contact. “ I apologise. I should not have even complained when I started this whole mess.” Before Whitty could ask, Updike cowered and admitted, “TGG was originally about ‘purifying’ nonhumans, hence the angel theming. Well, that is, before I took charge and started… you know.”

Whitty stayed silent.

Updike grabbed his paperwork once more. “I experienced firsthand how the facility suffered financially. Kindness, compassion? They do not provide tangible evidence that the danger is eliminated for certain compared to… dead bodies, so they meant nothing in the eyes of my mentor’s superiors. When the baton was passed to me, I caved.” He turned away, fiddling with his pen and scribbling his complicated signature on yet another document. “It is bleak how easy it was to up the funding once I made that decision; they encouraged the violence, and I was not charged for any of it because it was a war against your kind and therefore covered by the rules of engagement. It does not matter if my first kills were genuinely out of self-defence, I…”

After Updike trailed off, there was a long pause of silence as Whitty kept an understandably paranoid eye on Updike. Updike braced himself when watching Whitty stand up from the corner of his eyes, only to stare at the ground in confusion when Whitty simply sighed and turned away as well.

“I didn’t excuse your actions even if you were just followin’ traditions, and I suspected as much after Rosemary brought up your mentor disappearin’.” Whitty gave a sympathetic smile when Updike’s hair darkened in response. “I… dunno how I feel about it, but… You knew what you were gettin’ into, yet you’re still willin’ to change your ways. That’s… admirable. And I do appreciate you tellin’ me.”

Now it was Updike’s time to stay silent.

That was, until Whitty’s chest started buzzing with lo-fight, and Updike absentmindedly commented, “You’re bombinating.”

“Word of the day because I have no clue what that means, but also, was that a pun?!”

Updike blinked at his paperwork, slowly raising his head to meet Whitty’s giddy gaze. “Ah. I… suppose so.”

“I just know that Bee wouldn’t bee -lieve this!”

“Plonker.”

Whitty’s giggles were cut short when Girlfriend teleported next to them in a poof of pink glitter. “Greeting mortals!” Before Whitty could say anything, Girlfriend presented the container of deviled eggs tucked under their arm. “I bought these! Well, I tried making a batch of my own, but… let’s just say you can tell.”

Switching demeanors, Whitty instantly cackled. “Oh those are scorched . Very f*ckin’ crisp!” he joked, popping the p in crisp before sticking his tongue out at Girlfriend. “Gross!”

“ You’re gross,” Girlfriend shot back with the ferocity of the embodiment of the endless stars above before peacefully turning to Updike. “Hey Gabe, you want one?”

Updike opened his mouth, blinking when Whitty walked over to him and gave him a handshake before returning to his original spot. Updike stared at his hand. Whitty giggled again. After internally cursing Whitty for amping up the gremlin activity due to Girlfriend’s presence, Updike denied the deviled eggs, focusing on finishing his documentation while Girlfriend and Whitty caught each other up on current events.

“Events”, such as Girlfriend showing Whitty an album (pun not intended) of Boyfriend pictures, and Whitty nodding along with sparkly eyes and commenting “Ah, classic Olly” along the way.

When his phone alarm went off, indicating the next task on his schedule, Updike organized his paperwork and headed to the facility design lab with Girlfriend and Whitty following him like taffy stuck to his shoe.

While Updike did his actual job , he kept an eye on Girlfriend and Whitty sharing a single brain cell. Sure, Girlfriend at least rambled about math topics like linear differential equations, tetration, and the RSA cryptosystem (And just like with Bf, Updike had no clue how those exactly connected), the moment Girlfriend teleported in a science kit, the two of them were done for.

Girlfriend mixed up the quadratic formula and the quotient rule songs, and then Whitty confused a discriminant for a determinant (let’s be honest, Updike wasn’t sure if he knew what either meant). Girlfriend summoned an erasable pen to take “scientific notes”, and Whitty screwed with her by using his fire to erase said notes, to which Girlfriend retaliated.

“Stop stealin’ my stuff!” Whitty hissed, trying and failing to grab back his bubble container, flushing when Girlfriend laughed at his squeaking voice.

“I’m borrowing it.”

“Oh f*ck off .”

“I love you too~”

“Kids, keep it down,” Updike called out, eliciting a couple of grumbles. After a few moments of suspicious silence, Updike did a double take at the strandbeest now walking across his lab. There wasn’t even any wind- Oh wait never mind. Girlfriend teleported in a fan. Annnd made an autonomous bubble dipping and blowing machine.

Updike intensely sweatdropped as a mentos volcano went off in the background.

Girlfriend pointed to Whitty to shift the blame, and Whitty looked like he was only zoning into reality at that moment. Updike exhaled in exasperation, dragging a hand down his face as Girlfriend tried to distract him by rambling about the most beautiful mathematical proofs she knew.

“Ok look, just… clean that up please.”

“Aye aye captain!” Girlfriend chirped, snapping the mess away while Whitty settled down, taking a seat next to Updike to observe the way he put his hair up in a ponytail for lab safety.

Whitty curiously reached out for Updike’s hair, holding said hand up in surrender when Updike whipped around with a hidden knife pointed at him. “Sorry!”

While Girlfriend floated over to them, Updike dropped his knife, also mumbling an apology but as always, never explaining what he was thinking.

The two siblings, now two peas in a pod, watched as Updike referenced his design digital twin for analysis before building the physical prototype for testing. Between the wide variety of tools and finishes, Updike looked like a professional- Oh wait well, he was a professional wasn’t he.

When asked about it, Updike put away his push stick, making guiding marks for his bandsaw while responding, “‘Professional’? There are different standards for different professions, which one are you indicating?”

Girlfriend and Whitty rolled their eyes in sync. While the former muttered how ~professional~ that answer was, Whitty asked, “Well how about an engineer? They design stuff don’t they?”

“I make no claimant to the title of engineer. It would be quite derogatory.” Updike fed his project into a planer and dusted off a whole collection of sandpaper grit. “Regardless, could one of you please get me the arc edge trimmer? It should be on the right-hand shelf.” After a long pause of Girlfriend and Whitty wracking their singular brain cell, Updike glanced to his left. “What-”

“What.”

Updike whipped his head over to the right with wide eyes.

It took approximately three seconds for Updike to blush a fiery blue, fighting the urge to crawl into the lower cabinet and never come out. Updike slowly made an L with both his hands and hung his head in sheer humiliation afterward, eliciting a peal of laughter from Girlfriend. Updike gave in to his urge, scrunching up and scuttling into the dark.

“Gigs you can stop laughin’ now.”

Between laughs, Girlfriend exclaimed, “That. Is. A f*cking MOOD .” Whitty deadpanned at Girlfriend before kneeling next to the cabinet to try to coax Updike out. Girlfriend gave a trembling exhale as if clearing out her laughter, wiping away a tear before reassuring, “Gabe, I don’t know my lefts and rights either. I think it’s a spatial thing, ironic isn’t it?”

“...”

“Wait, is this why you always got lost chasin’ after me?” Whitty blurted, peeking into the cabinet and illuminating the space with his flashlight eyes, spotting Updike literally tucked in the corner. “And also those times when you literally walked into-”

Updike poked his head out like a hissing groundhog. “ Zip , you’re exaggerating!” Whitty stifled a small laugh in response, to which Updike groaned, burying his face in his hands. “I am usually… better .”

“Then I would say, I’m glad you’re more comfortable around us now,” Girlfriend chirped, teleporting on top of the cabinet and dangling her head down to just stare at Updike.

“...I am done.” Updike scrambled out of his hiding place, religiously organizing his tools and knotting a rolling hitch to lower some of his lab equipment for a semblance of control. “Done with you, done with all of this.”

Girlfriend twirled in place three times and curtsied. “I’ll get going then-”

“I didn’t mean it like that .”

Whitty snorted, hugging the two of them together to nonverbally tease both of them for being disasters. Girlfriend teleported out of Whitty’s hug, and Updike half stumbled out of it. Whitty opened his mouth to ask if Updike was alright, only for Updike to pick up a stray broken pen from the work desk and mutter to himself, “I should get shredded paper towels to keep this pen lead in position.”

“Why don’t you get an actual pen spring to hold it in place instead, like it’s supposed to be?” Girlfriend sassed, complete with a hand out. “Keep it simple stupid!”

Updike dryly answered, “Don’t you bring up design principles with me. I would argue my way is simpler-”

“But it’s still stupid,” Whitty joked, holding up his hand and facepalming when Girlfriend completely missed the high five.

Shaking his head with a small smile, Updike rubbed between his eyebrows. “Yer both dorks. C’mon, let’s get outta here.”

“ Wow that was informal, not gon lie you really need sleep,” Girlfriend bluntly responded, sidestepping as Updike rummaged through the shelves.

After Updike gathered his final paperwork, Whitty scooped him up into a princess carry. “Alright Sir Updike, time to go home!”

“I still need to-! Oh who am I kidding. Fine.”

Updike cradled his pile of documents like a teddy bear, trying and failing not to slip off into dreamland; Whitty was as warm as his cheering of Updike actually agreeing to end his work on time.

Until Girlfriend teleported them home and gave Updike a headache from how sudden it was.

Between Whitty anxiously fussing over him and where to put all his documents, and Girlfriend bouncing in place as a stim and rambling about the logistics of teleporting, this little group was going to be the death of Updike.

And deep down, Updike cherished it.

*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*

What Updike didn’t cherish, was yet another harrowing video call with his higher-ups, complete with high expectations yet low resources. Updike might have seemed stoic throughout the call, but the moment the call ended, he icily seethed to himself, “Some bloody ‘angel of death’ I am, you treat me like an absolute child .”

“Ouch, felt.”

Updike forced himself to still, turning around to see the beep boop boy that was Boyfriend standing in front of his office door. “Are you and Whitty taking turns to check on me every day?”

Boyfriend chuckled, jogging in front of Updike’s desk and making jazz hands. “You got us~ Whits sends his regards, and if today goes well, maybe we’ll ease up the bother lol!” Updike gave an amused hum of affirmation. “So! Whatcha up to?”

“Mmm, I was about to check on the current captured nonhumans-”

“Let’s-a go!”

An eye roll later, Updike led Boyfriend past the security systems, allowing him to meet Pluv and Lambent for example while he himself documented everyone’s emotional state progression. One new nonhuman, at the sight of Updike, banged on the glass cell to get his attention.

Updike opened his mouth to ask what was up, dodging a laser-like light beam that phased through the glass, only for the beam to get absorbed into the main control panel behind him. When the maintenance system glitched, Updike froze as each of the cell doors flickered open.

Hurrying to the computer, Updike tried to reboot the system, biting back a yelp when Boyfriend pinballed him out of another beam attack and ceased all actions in the room with a wave of his hand.

Warily peeking open an eye, Updike watched Boyfriend, complete with glowing green eyes, pasting himself directly into the computer system to clear out the glitch. Updike glanced around him. Some of the nonhumans were nocturnal and sleeping, while others actually stayed put in their cells out of either complaisance or fear.

Only the one who glitched the system was frozen in time midair, a couple of feet away from tackling Updike.

Updike stood up as Boyfriend finished up his work, sealing up the cells and now only keeping a hold on the hostile nonhuman.

“Are you ready?” Boyfriend asked, getting ready to snap his fingers.

“Ready… for what?”

“Some hacking~”

A blink later, the three of them disappeared from the room, leaving the rest of the nonhumans in abject confusion.

Materializing in a brand new dimension, Updike pulled out his fists when the nonhuman charged at him again, only for the two of them to phase right through each other.

“Where are we???” they blurted in unison, to which Boyfriend gracefully floated down from the heavens.

“Pft lol I dunno, um, the compiler? This is the private area for keeping peeps in stasis I told you about!” Boyfriend kicked at the white void below them with a squint. “Yea no I’m not sure, you’re gonna have to ask Pico for the actual details.” Updike and the nonhuman both stared at Boyfriend, sweatdropping. “Hey don’t look at me like that! I just pulled your source codes together, think of it as a dual therapy session!”

The nonhuman hissed and glared at Updike before stubbornly staying silent, so Updike took a seat and awkwardly cleared his throat, fighting off the existential crisis of just what Boyfriend could do. “Hello. So… You could have escaped long before I got there.”

“...”

“Honestly with your passion, you probably could have incited a whole rebellion against me.”

“...”

With the callousness of a god, Boyfriend asked, “Do you want me to look into their code-?”

“Do not . I want them to share what they want, so please do not breach that privacy,” Updike cut in, spotting the way the nonhuman blinked before growling at him again. “It… is the least I could do.”

Boyfriend nodded, shutting his eyes as his presence phased out of existence to give them alone time.

There was a period of silence.

Updike glanced up at the endless white void above, leaning back on his hands. “So, what is this about? My past actions I’m guessing? I am… not proud of being the executioner, and I understand your hostility. It is valid you do not yet trust me, that being said, I promise I will not kill you-”

“I want to kill you.” Updike held back a gulp as the nonhuman towered over him before continuing, “Stupid hero complex. Well you don’t get to play the hero , ok?”

There were… background flashes. Of the nonhuman under physical abuse, from society, but also presumably a partner. Updike’s eyes widened when he instinctively knew those were encoded memories from reality.

“I… I admit, I focus a lot on what I could do for others , but in the end, I do not get to be the hero,” Updike answered, slipping in projected memories of his own verbal abuse regarding his higher-ups’ animosity while tucking in his knees. “I get neither approval nor praise from the public for these changes, I just want to be better.”

“No!” the nonhuman snarled, pressing their face close to Updike’s. “You’re a monster! And you should prove me right . You didn’t mind your own f*cking business, you’re a condescending asshole trying to FIX us, and you never had good intentions. Show me I’m right!”

Updike had to bite the inside of his cheek to avoid giving in to his fight response. “...You’re scared.” The nonhuman froze, staying utterly silent. “I… truly do not mean to come off as condescending here. If I was in your position, I would feel awful . I mean, you guys already deal with so much, then I come along to capture and surveil you, doing what I think is best for all of you.”

“...”

Digging a hand through his hair, Updike exhaled. “Listen, I would not confront your abuser without a plan for the consequences, and it means a lot to me you revealed it in the first place. You are welcome to give suggestions on how I could help.”

When the nonhuman continued staying silent, Updike fidgeted with his gloves when realizing it must have been so awkward for the OG group to continue those one-sided conversations with him, but he genuinely didn’t know what else to add…

“...No, it’s fine. I guess I’ll… stay in your little cell thing,” the nonhuman grumbled, curling up next to Updike and shuffling away when Updike reached out a hand towards him. “Whatever happens is on you, you know that right?”

“I know that all too well.” Updike tugged at a strand of his hair. If they were capable of breaking out, they must also be scared about who would break in , so Updike reassured, “I promise I will amp up the security.”

“And keep the control panel out of access?”

Updike blushed in embarrassment and half-squawked, “I know I know, I’m just not used to dealing with non humans!”

“Excuses.”

Updike felt like he was still missing something , but when the nonhuman glanced off and shut their eyes, he didn’t push it. “Alright, that’s that then. Um… How do we get out of here.”

After literally praying to Boyfriend so he would bring them back, Updike made sure the nonhuman was comfortable huddling in their cell before heading back to his office to draft up changes for the cell system. Unsurprisingly, it was only when they were alone did Updike turn to Boyfriend and comment, “Thanks for what you did back there. I… appreciate it.”

Updike had to brace himself for the loud cheering that followed.

Boyfriend waved a hand, and after Updike gingerly returned the high five, literally pulled the code of Updike’s interaction with the nonhuman and pasted it into one of Updike’s computer files.

“Well. I suppose that counts as evidence for my higher-ups,” Updike dryly answered, ignoring the layer of existential crisis coating his soul like wall paint. “I cannot believe that between you and Whitty, you are the one getting out supernatural powers to handle a conflict.”

To no one’s surprise, Boyfriend flaunted his summoned microphone, electricity buzzing through it in amusem*nt when joking about his rap battles being supernatural too. Updike rolled his eyes and sank against his office chair. While Boyfriend now pranced in the background chatting about some new phishing technique people should be aware of, Updike dug into the company data to justify his company changes.

Strange. There were… financial inconsistencies.

For the first time since he started this job, Updike actually didn’t let remorse stop him from researching past anomaly files, frowning when he got denied access to a good chunk of them.

Updike listened to Boyfriend questioning to himself where the TGG logo came from. Hm. That reminded Updike, Boyfriend knew at least one dimensional anomaly. Updike specialized in anomalies, particularly dangerous ones, so why didn’t he at least get a warning of dimensional ones?

Stewing over the possibilities, Updike moved on to other projects. He rolled up his sleeves, tied his hair back, and got to work. He alternated between a soldering iron and a soldering gun, tinkered with different sensors and signals, and fixed up loose project parts with a socket or regular wrench.

“Why does that say america?”

Updike poked his head out from under the machinery, glancing towards where Boyfriend was looking. “Oh, ‘US’, ultrasonic sensor.”

“They look like eyes, that’s so cuteee .” Boyfriend watched as Updike rolled out with a hum of agreement, absentmindedly patting the machine as a plea for the code to not crash. “Man you’re so cool.”

Caught off guard, Updike scratched at his flushing cheek, grumbling when realizing he got motor oil everywhere, but also flushing harder at how enamored Boyfriend looked. “Ahem. I will be tidying the area up. Would you care to accompany me to my next meeting afterward? I could call Abdel to give us a ride?”

Boyfriend, however, was more focused on someone outside of Updike’s office. “I’ll drop by after this rap battle ok byeee!”

Updike squinted his eyes in amused exasperation amidst the cartoon dust cloud Boyfriend left behind.

*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*

It was another long arduous meeting: Updike was in the front presenting, explaining in detail containment methods for possible future targets, when Boyfriend suddenly appeared at the center of the conference table.

Everyone startled and pointed the nearest weapon at him. Even Updike yeeted his pointer sticker at Boyfriend and accidentally skewered his cap.

“Sorry! Told you my teleportation isn’t as accurate as Gf’s!” Boyfriend chirped, grabbing back his cap and handing the pointer stick back to Updike, who simply rubbed between his eyebrows.

“Hi to you too, Bf.” The employees stared at the two of them, confused why Updike wasn’t smiting Boyfriend for disturbing their meeting, even more so when Updike groaned, “What am I going to do about you. What am I going to do about containing nonhumans with teleportation ?”

“Ask my babe! You know they’re the god of space, so I think they could create hitbox triggers around the world,” Boyfriend said while making an encircling motion with his hands.

Sweatdropping, Updike flatly answered, “You are going to give all of my employees an existential crisis.”

“Whoop.”

Updike fiddled with his hair, clenching his hand into a fist and pinning it under his other arm when realizing. Boyfriend on the other hand, didn’t give a damn about who was there, zoomed around the room with apologies before screeching next to Updike and bouncing up and down for movement stimming.

“Anyways… Boyfriend is authorised by me to be here,” Updike told his employees, trying not to get distracted with thoughts of Boyfriend being his right hand man (and considering Boyfriend was a rightie, pun not intended). “Shall we continue the meeting?”

And continue they did. Boyfriend plopped himself right on the far end of the table, eagerly giving his thoughts and ideas, inspiring the employees to be more confident in their skills. His not putting people on pedestals because it’s just not his style was still as prevalent as ever, huh?

Even after the meeting was over, Boyfriend was still bonding with his employees over everything from weaponry to languages to music. In fact, Boyfriend summoned his bass guitar, tuning on the spot and strumming the most angelic piece of music any of them had ever listened to, a piece which dampened their worries like an ethereal mist.

Boyfriend now chatted about how he learned the bass guitar because of Whitty, all while Updike leaned against the far wall, forcing a small smile at Boyfriend’s spunky nature.

“I hate to cut this short, but I will be taking my leave,” Updike cut in, stoic as to now reveal the wave of bitterness at why he even said that considering Boyfriend would stay and they would get along fine without him.

“Okie dokie, let’s go!”

Boyfriend waved goodbye to the employees before hopping next to Updike, staring up at him like a doggo waiting for a treat.

Ugh, why wasn’t he staying with them? Now Updike had to deal with this burden on top of his actual work??? The wave of bitterness once again washed over Updike, but both times, Updike took a soft inhale and cleared the mean flood.

The two of them headed back to the TGG facility. Updike stayed silent through it all, while Boyfriend rambled about time management techniques.

For someone who knew so many, he sure didn’t apply them-

Updike internally shook his head clear of that thought as well, distracting himself by bringing up, “My projects start easy and gradually increase in difficulty.”

“Oh neat! Then you can build up your motivation over time!”

While his pessimistic mind screamed about burnout, Updike shook his head. “But, the tasks start at a difficult level.”

“Yay that’s great! Then you can get the toughest things out of the way, eat the frog technique!” Boyfriend once again chirped before grumbling to himself how he felt bad about the name of it.

Now Updike’s pessimistic mind screamed about learned helplessness, one silenced for a moment when Boyfriend accidentally strayed off course and bumped against his side.

A random spark of pain shooting through his legs, Updike stumbled on his feet.

“Whoa, sorry-!”

“Do not touch me.”

Boyfriend withdrew his hands while Updike stabilized himself and continued on like nothing had happened.

“Um… Are you alright, Gabs?” Updike didn’t respond, so Boyfriend caught up to him and tried, “Ok then, uh, how are your… how is your pain?”

“I do not yearn for this conversation.”

“O… kay then.” They both wallowed in the silence, and unsurprisingly, Boyfriend was the first to break it. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to- Ok that sounds bad, um-”

“We are here.”

Updike went to focus on his paperwork as expected, so Boyfriend shut his mouth with a jaw click and lounged on the couch, humming to pass the time.

There was a period of time when Updike actually focused, but that focus was quickly broken when the smell of burning wood wafted through the room. “What did you do.”

“Nothing!” Boyfriend blurted, looking sheepish as Updike stared at the feathery pattern Boyfriend carved into one of his wooden desktops using electricity. “Ok maybe not nothing. I wanted to see if I could control the electricity to make a bee drawing. Whits would love it.”

“You are welcome to visit him; you do not have an obligation to be with me,” Updike dryly said, narrowing his eyes when Boyfriend hesitated. Did… Boyfriend think he needed the protection ?! This little-

“I still wanna stay with you, it’s not a bother.”

Not a bother for who -?! Updike snuffed out the anger raging within him with a passive aggressive sigh, feeling a slight twinge of mean satisfaction when Boyfriend wilted.

“It’s ok!” Boyfriend continued, scrambling over and taking a seat on Updike’s desk. “I’ll be more useful! What are you working on right now?”

Burying his emotions in a graveyard of apathy, Updike described the current issue he was working on and the roadblock he was encountering.

“And- Wait… Hold up, is it just… it is literally just dividing these two together and I did not do that,” Updike muttered, and when the issue got resolved just like that, he bopped his forehead against his desk in sheer anguish.

Boyfriend reached out a comforting hand before pausing and withdrawing it with a gulp. “Yeah haha, no worries. I’m glad you were able to find the solution by yourself!” Updike stayed silent. “Hey it’s ok to make mistakes-”

“Could you please just zip it.” To Boyfriend’s merit, he did in fact fall silent. After only a few moments, Updike dug a hand through his hair and sat up straight. “Actually no, I cannot stand the silence if you choose to stay.”

“Don’t worry I’ll stay!” Boyfriend hopped off the desk, and even the sound of him accidentally brushing a pen off onto the floor sent a burning dagger through Updike’s chest.

Updike exhaled, trying to work on his emails and literally having to bat Boyfriend’s face away from the screen due to both confidentiality and anxiety.

Boyfriend, feeling left out once more, rummaged through Updike’s cabinets while humming 8D triple layered songs as a verbal stim, missing how it grated against Updike’s nerves because frankly, Updike didn’t show it.

“Yo do you know where the expiration date for this tea is?”

“...On the box, next to nutrition facts.”

“Wow, you’re so nice!” Boyfriend exclaimed, once again missing the near invisible twitch of Updike’s eyebrows. “Thanks that helps a lot, I feel more at ease-”

“Oh do you now.”

Blinking, Boyfriend turned to Updike wildly scribbling at his paperwork. “I just… wanted to make some tea for you. So you would be more at ease too.” Updike wanted to be grateful. He wanted to… but the building edge of suppressed anger honed his words down to silence. A silence that left Boyfriend biting his lower lip as he hesitantly put the tea packets back. “But, never mind. Sorry…”

After a brief pause, Updike mumbled, “Simply because you should not bother-”

“Hey it’s no bother!” Boyfriend cut in, sending one more well meaning but accidental dagger through Updike’s sanity.

As Boyfriend thought out loud and empathized through an anecdote, Updike only heard it as him venting and wanting advice, which he himself did not have the mindspace for. “Boyfriend. Please stop.”

“Huh? No no, I was just saying-”

“No, it is. Fine. I-”

“I get it, if it’s any comfort- Oh sorry, cut you off there. Go ahead.”

Updike dragged his hands down his face, more focused on keeping it together than on his work , oh lord. No Boyfriend didn’t get it, no it wasn’t any comfort, but Updike just… couldn’t bring himself to say it, because he logically knew Boyfriend was being genuine. In the end, Updike only icily, immaturely, droned, “No, no it does not matter. Good for you. Sure. Whatever.”

Boyfriend sat next to Updike. “Are you alright? Did I say something wrong?”

“I am used to it.”

“Ok!” Boyfriend beamed, faltering when Updike’s hair darkened instead. “...Hey, how about we both go down and get some fruit slices, a good walk also always helps me-”

“Oh my lord, would you zip it.” Boyfriend flinched, but in true familiarity, Updike missed it amidst his snapping, “I cannot . I need to focus on this . To make sure people do not DIE . Do you not have other work to do???”

Crossing his arms, Boyfriend grumbled, “I was waiting for you to give me something I could help you with. I was so bored-”

“Would you stop gloating . You do not understand how abstruse these concepts are, you will underestimate how long it takes you, and you threw my entire timetable into chaos again . You think I want you here?” Updike hissed, standing up and towering over Boyfriend like an ancient glacier.

Contrasting Updike’s cold eyes, Boyfriend’s became teary. “Wha- Have you been lying this whole time? Have you ever f*cking cared about me???” Boyfriend gave a low chuckle, sporting a familiar smug grin. “I have worked hard to get to where I am today, if you just wanted me to go, you could have told me?!”

“Would you have listened .”

“Yes! I mean, I try !”

“Oh lord help me I am going to kill myself-” Boyfriend froze, toppling his chair when grabbing Updike’s arm, only to be shoved back by Updike’s growl, “I SAID. Do. Not. Touch. Me.”

Boyfriend held his hands up in surrender. “I am so sorry. I just- that was a joke, right?”

Updike stayed silent. Whether he was stonewalling to hurt Boyfriend, or simply dissociating from the conversation, both were concerning. Updike walked past Boyfriend, a hand trailing along his desk.

Furrowing his eyebrows, Boyfriend followed Updike, freezing when Updike pointed his index finger at him. There was the whirring of machinery coming to life, and an automated robot unfolded from the wall and began shoving Boyfriend out the door.

“Wait no- No I am not leaving you like this- Wait- Ugh-” Boyfriend watched as Updike, not even taking another look at him, sat back in his chair to focus on his work. “I better see you alive after this, ok?!”

The door slammed shut between them.

*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*

Dodging. Diving. Dancing.

Updike was on a solo mission, acting on autopilot to defeat the crowd of enemies around him, handling the stray stragglers after kicking his target’s ass. Through it all, Updike’s mind was still fuzzy with conflicting thoughts about how things ended with Boyfriend.

Oh no, this fight was drifting towards residential areas, Updike needed to-

He sensed someone new walking into the battle, sliding in front of them to tank an attack, mind snapping back to reality when a protective green bubble encased them both. The familiar pinball that was Boyfriend zipped around Updike, clearing the area with a single musical blast.

Updike tried running towards Boyfriend, and the immediate pain in his hands and feet sent him crumbling to the ground.

He almost wanted to laugh.

The conflict soon died down as Boyfriend teleported the remaining enemies away, stepping in front of Updike and offering a hand. Updike only stayed there on the ground, propping himself up against the nearest wall.

“How…?” At Boyfriend’s confusion, Updike continued, “How did you find me?”

“A little birdie told me~”

Updike fell silent, and it was only when Boyfriend exhaled and took a step back did he blurt, “wait-” before cutting himself off again.

Boyfriend took the seat next to him, lightheartedly saying, “Y’know, you’re giving off a lotta mixed signals.” Updike, a 5’10 tall bundle of awkwardness, predictably stayed silent. “...It’s good to see you, Gabs.”

Staring over at Boyfriend with wide shaking eyes, Updike couldn’t help but quirk a bittersweet smile. “Likewise.”

While Updike’s breath trembled alongside his teary eyes, Boyfriend glanced off and fiddled with his microphone. “I really think you should let your tears out sometime. Like… take them for a walk. I dunno what I’m saying.”

“...Not yet. This area is not safe for you.”

“I could teleport us back to your office.” Boyfriend paused. “Oh although you prefer being alone right? I do not want to leave you like this, but would you rather…”

Updike buried his face against his tucked in knees. “You can teleport us both if you do not strain yourself-”

They poofed onto Updike’s office couch, and the sudden wave of dizziness sent Updike sprawling across the couch cushions. Updike’s stomach gurgled from stress, and Boyfriend couldn’t help but wince knowing Updike probably got a headache on top of that.

He fought the urge to add to said headache by yeeting tylenol at Updike’s head for being a dummy.

Ignoring the dull pain shooting through his temples, Updike pushed himself back up to play some atmospheric music on his phone. “Here Bf, I also brewed some green tea.” He blinked when Boyfriend pressed a packet of headache meds into his hands in response. “Oh… Thank you.”

The silence between them wasn’t as silent anymore.

Boyfriend glanced over at Updike’s work desk, commenting, “Wow you really do work better without me around.”

Updike teared up again.

Boyfriend’s panic about not knowing where Updike’s sunglasses were or whether he should leave was cut short by Updike’s “No, no that is alright. I… may I please talk about… Um.” Updike squirmed in place. “I just, you deserve my vulnerability.”

“...Mmm. Yea we should talk about it.” Boyfriend picked at his nails, softening when Updike offhandedly opened the coffee table drawer to give him a set of fidget toys.

“Okay. So…” Updike fell silent once more, trying and failing to figure out what to say, mind scrambling for something familiar to hold onto.

Boyfriend chuckled in empathy, joking, “C’mon, don’t leave me alone with my thoughts-”

“My apologies,” Updike blurted, wincing and curling up away from Boyfriend. “Actually no, I should be- Ok you deserve this one instead: I’m sorry. I was an arsehole. You did not deserve all the horrible things I… told. You. And… I want to- Well I will try, to be better?” Updike gulped, still uncomfortable enough dragging up so much shame that he buried his face against a couch pillow. “If my trying isn’t enough, I… am also sorry for that. I genuinely don’t know what… I don’t know. I’m sorry.”

Between the atmospheric music and Boyfriend playing with a push popper, at least the two of them weren’t as on edge as before.

“How long have I been overstepping your boundaries.” Updike hesitated, so Boyfriend continued, “Please, I am not the innocent one here either. You’re already dealing with all these scary changes, and I dropped by specifically to… help. Lmao. I was an asshole too, I’m sorry-” Updike sneezed, mumbling a thank you when Boyfriend handed him a tissue. “Are you sick again???”

“No, no.” When Boyfriend had to deadpan at Updike to explain himself for once, Updike squished the tassels of his pillow while whispering, “Uh. It is because your presence literally alters my office temperature.”

“OH.” Boyfriend rubbed the nape of his neck with a gulp. “Oh no, I had no idea. I… I was the one more at fault here, wasn’t I. Should I leave?”

“Let’s not get into that argument, and no you’re alright. Well, I’m assuming not literally alright in other contexts. And I also didn’t mean that physically, but that’s not-” Updike shut himself up by smooshing his pillow over his head, cowering when Boyfriend giggled in response.

Boyfriend kicked his legs back and forth in amusem*nt before stilling again. “But seriously. When did I start overstepping your boundaries?”

Heaving himself into a sitting position, Updike didn’t dare make eye contact. “...I do not know. It built up over time.” He physically restrained himself from rubbing at his eyes when they welled up again . Boyfriend tilted his head at Updike, who forced himself to admit, “I… struggle. With knowing what my body feels, when it’s something I can no longer handle. I do not blame you though, I never told you anything, and by the time it got too overwhelming, I am… not sure I could have told you.”

“Hm. I feel like you have executive dysfunction and sensory issues, just like me. I know how much that sucks.” The sheer confusion on Updike’s face told Boyfriend that he never thought about applying those terms to himself. “Annnd judging by what happened earlier, it’s a bad pain day on top of it.”

“You too, huh?”

As a parallel, Boyfriend was now the one who stayed silent.

Updike hopped off the couch, taking the time to skim through some more paperwork and emails, and Boyfriend inched over a few minutes later.

The two of them looked at each other, both starting, “You-” The two shy lean mean fighting machines both cut themselves off, with Updike nodding for Boyfriend to go ahead. “...You’re so smart.”

“Huh?”

“You’re literally so attentive when you’re in the right mental state, and you work so hard.” Boyfriend gestured to the wall behind Updike. “That robot thingie was so cool. You’ve got all these projects that you’re capable of working on alone . And the way you stick to a goal and fight so hard to get the job done??? Like, you’ve heard of all talk, no action, you’re the opposite. I always feel so out of my depth because I feel like I should be smarter.”

“I am not as smart as you think I am-”

“Oh shut up . Respectfully.”

As if proving Boyfriend’s point, Updike set down a technical drawing of his latest machinery to assess the dosage of anesthesia based on a nonhuman’s physiology. “...Well, you are still here, no? Your presence can be… overwhelming, at times, no offence, but that does not mean I do not appreciate it.” Updike nonchalantly shrugged as if he wasn’t about to drop compliment bombshells . “You excel in street smarts, and there is no question that you work hard for your rap battles. And that is not to mention how remarkable your kindness is.”

Boyfriend plopped himself down next to Updike in awe, but still grumbled, “I wasn’t so kind to you.”

“...Alright? In moderation, it is quite admirable how you defend yourself, and you realise that you were not as kind as you could have been, so you are willing to improve as well. You were right when saying you had worked hard to get to where you are today, I do not question that you will always have something to bring to the table.”

“What, my fidget toy?”

Now it was Updike’s turn to stifle a chuckle at how literally Boyfriend took it, and Boyfriend actually beamed in response.

“That is what I am talking about,” Updike said with a muffled snap of his gloved fingers. “Physical strength aside, you are more resilient than you let on. You take pride in accepting who you are, and you’re so protean.”

“I’m protein-N???”

“Like, flexible with skills and change-”

“Bruh I am not flexible with change.”

Updike actually failed to stifle a snort out of sheer empathy. “Better than me, that good?”

Boyfriend now lounged on top of Updike’s desk. “Yea accurate~ Although I was just wondering, are you sure you want to continue this conversation?”

Glancing down at his paperwork and twirling his pen, Updike exhaled. “I… want to trust more people, so I have indeed been trying to delegate more work to my employees.” He scratched his cheek, muttering, “In fact, I cannot believe they actually want to contribute more.”

“They admire you as a leader.”

Updike’s pen clattered across the floor.

“What? No they… They admire you . You stand out, you’re good with people. People actually want to be friends with you , you little raconteur.”

“Huh…?” Boyfriend adjusted his seating so he was facing Updike, who only stared down at his documents. “No, I know you guys aren’t friends friends because of the power dynamic, but they love you as a boss.”

“They would love you as a boss. You’re passionate about protecting the world, you’re kind and get along with them, you’re the one who sorted out that nonhuman breaking out of their cell-”

“Whoa whoa hold up, what? I would be terrible . Also did you forget that you were the one who got through to them?” Boyfriend mimed shushing Updike with a finger, just knowing Updike was going to try to discredit himself. “ You were right, I dunno anything about your office job-”

Updike shook his head. “You could learn like I did. Plus, you’ve literally got all the time in the world-”

“I am SO time blind. You were also painfully right in that I will underestimate how long it’ll take me to learn all this stuff, I could literally never keep a stable schedule.” When Updike didn’t respond, Boyfriend reassured, “Hey, it’s ok if you struggle in social situations. I did, and still do too. Believe it or not, I was that one shy quiet kid in the back of the classroom. And Whits is an introvert-”

“So then what excuse do I have?” Updike whispered, eyes dazed as his breath hitched. “...But no, I shall not get into it. I would be a hypocrite if I did not ask for permission before venting.”

After a long pause, Boyfriend awkwardly said, “Are you… gonna ask.”

“No.”

Boyfriend sputtered before facepalming. “Oh man is this what Whits had to deal with when it comes to me?”

Updike pursed his lips. “I am serious. I simply cannot allow-”

“I came here. To help . If you want to know, it actually makes me happy. If you don’t wanna talk about it, alright, but now you’re just automatically assuming you can’t???”

“I shouldn’t .”

“Because it’s awkward? Vulnerable? Because you don’t feel like you deserve to?” Boyfriend flatly answered, crossing his legs when Updike squirmed in place. “I know it’s your thing , but, and it’s a genuine question here, is avoiding it the best thing for you?”

A few seconds later, Updike rummaged through his desk drawer and got out a contact lens case. “I will be back in two minutes.”

“Uh- huh .” Boyfriend watched Updike leave, getting distracted by the countless stamp designs Updike had shelved together and jolting when the door creaked open again. “Oh wait, you meant exactly two minutes.”

Updike intensely rubbed his eyelids with a sigh. “Yeah, yep. Okay. Thanks for waiting. I… How do I word this.”

“You want to talk about it?”

“Ah, yes, that would probably be beneficial, if you are okay with-”

“I’m more than okay,” Boyfriend chuckled, dragging over a chair and sitting with crossed legs as if his feet were allergic to the ground. “And since it seems like this helps, I want you to talk about it. You’ll actually make it up to me regarding how emotionally distant you’ve been. But uh, no pressure, our f*ckeries kinda canceled?”

Setting his contact lens case on the desk, Updike absentmindedly twirled the case. “I am on board with that.”

In true Updike fashion, due to the fact that he didn’t plan this out with a script, he pinballed from topic to topic (something Boyfriend was very familiar with). From the overwhelming facility changes and decision fatigue, to him questioning the very system every task force tangentially related to his was operating under, back to his position as a leader before his insecurities crept back in.

“Are you sure you are alright with me just, complaining like this,” Updike mumbled, doodling swirls on a stray piece of paper as an excuse not to make eye contact and so he had something to do with his hands. “I am older than you, so…”

“Well yeah. I think it’s only fair, you’re already dealing with so much, you’re allowed to be upset even if you’re holding up well enough in the meantime.” Boyfriend mime flicked Updike’s hair before pulling out his phone to reassure Updike he didn’t like eye contact much either. “I’m an adult too, Gabs. Shocker, I know. You trusting in me enough to tell me these things doesn’t negate you looking out for me. And if it’s any consolation, I could even argue I’m older than you because I represent the concept of time~”

“Why are you so good.”

Boyfriend furrowed his eyebrows when glancing over at Updike, who actually started silently sobbing. Well, that was what he was waiting for.

“Oh lord, how do you expect me to live up to this?!” In a fit of emotion, Updike uncharacteristically shoved a pile of documents off his work table. “You are kinder than me, you are better at combat than me, you are better with people than me, WHEN are my employees going to expose me for being a fraud??? You should be the leader-”

“I think I have established that I really shouldn’t-”

“And I should just be GONE .” Updike pressed a hand against his face, body trembling as he hung his head. “Bf, if these facility changes go through, human connection will be the most vital aspect of this job.”

Wallowing in the sadness of how Updike defaulted to shame and remorse, Boyfriend lightheartedly said, “Well I’m not human, so you’re perfect for the job-”

“You don’t understand . You are GOOD with people. I need a bloody work persona just to give a presentation speech-”

“I definitely don’t fare well with speeches-”

“Shush shush, shush . I can’t- Whitty too, he- And you , it is SO easy for you to connect with people, and I can’t . How do you do it??? How is it so easy for everyone else but ME ? And why ??? Why can’t I do the same? What’s wrong with me? My reputation’s already tarnished, and if these changes go through, what hope is there left for me? I’m more of a ticking time bomb than Whitty, lord damn it . And this isn’t just about being sociable, why couldn’t I have been more loving ? I can’t even bloody SAY I love someone. Why couldn’t I have just been better ??? Like, no one got to know me for literal decades ??? Why on earth did I have to be…… me…?”

Updike trailed off, shoulders hunched as he grabbed fistfuls of his gray hair to try to ground himself. Boyfriend leaned over and grabbed a tissue for him, to which Updike turned away, frantically wiping away his tears between breathy gasps and scrambling to pick up his scattered documents.

Boyfriend tried to hand Updike the tissue again, heart aching when Updike denied it once again in order to organize his documents and to intensely focus on getting them done, because he couldn’t stand not doing something actually meaningful .

“It isn’t easy for me, and I don’t ‘click’ with people as deeply as you might think. You aren’t alone in all of this, in needing to learn to accept who you are,” Boyfriend countered, faltering when Updike softly tsked in response, his swollen blue eyes still tearing up. “...At the same time, your struggles are unique. Man I also keep forgetting you aren’t really that old. You’re not even thirty. And you… don’t exactly have good experiences with love, do you.”

“Could you please zip it.” The snottiness of his voice aside, Updike actually looked queasy. “This conversation is terminated .”

“...M’kay. I’ll leave you alone for a few minutes to gather your thoughts, actually,” Boyfriend said, rolling over and picking up the forgotten teapot.

Updike sped walked next to him. “What are you doing.”

“I’m gonna go reheat-”

“That is sacrilegious .”

Boyfriend tilted his head. “I mean I get if it’s been over four hours and it isn’t safe, but-”

“No. You simply do not nuke tea. Period .”

A startled laugh later, Boyfriend set the teapot down. “Maybe I will nuke it.” Updike’s hair literally fluffed up in annoyance. “Aka give it to Whits and make a new batch. Seriously, who uses nuking as a synonym for microwaving these days?”

Updike crossed his arms with a small wordless grumble. “I swear, one of ‘these days’, I am going to fire you.”

“Lol good luck with that dude, I’ve been doing all of this for way longer!” Boyfriend cackled, pouring himself the cooled down tea to drink anyway. “Seriously no offense, but I don’t wanna be an official employee here. Something something favoritism and separation of duties, something something external motivations and overjustification effect. Seriously, you struggle enough with overworking, I’m also not giving you more incentive to f*ck your work-life balance up.”

“Mmm.” The tension over exposing his insecurities fading away, Updike shuffled his hands down his arms. “But… you in particular have done so much. How do I compensate you for everything?”

“Subscribe to my youtube channel,” Boyfriend joked, flailing when Updike literally grabbed his phone to do just that. “Ok y’know what, sure, if you want.”

While Boyfriend shared his channel name and Updike curiously scrolled through, they both jolted when Girlfriend teleported next to them with an angel food cake on a plate. “Hello boys!”

“Gf!” Boyfriend chirped, and after Girlfriend levitated the cake, she tackled Boyfriend with a hug and kiss.

Updike stepped close in order to greet them, only to pause and surreptitiously grab a chair to sit down because his legs were trembling. Boyfriend and Girlfriend both glanced over, and Updike unsurprisingly shut them down before they even said anything because he was… busy.

“Do you… want cake?”

“No.” After a brief pause, Updike continued while shuffling his way back to his work desk and donned his eyeglasses, “But uh… you two may stay if you so choose.”

The couple shrugged at each other, setting the cake aside as they hung out in the background. Girlfriend teleported the cold tea back home while Boyfriend got started on a new batch because Updike especially needed the hydration.

While Updike was methodically analyzing his task force data, Boyfriend and Girlfriend were playing darts with conspiracy theory red strings. Girlfriend also dumped a whole bag of fortune telling fish onto Boyfriend to tease him for being so sweaty before making art puns like comparing Boyfriend to an ultra fine marker, to which Boyfriend joked she should “stop chalking” so he could ramble about preventing line handling accidents.

Before long, the two were trying to airdrop Updike gen z slang memes to confuse the hell out of him, to which Updike gave an exasperated smile, tolerating their shenanigans.

When it was clear Updike wasn’t going to touch the cake Girlfriend brought, Girlfriend fed Boyfriend a forkful instead. Updike noticed the way Girlfriend winced, alternating between her hands as if trying to make sure both hands got even usage time. Boyfriend stopped her along the way, and Updike tore his gaze away when Girlfriend nervously traced her arms and revealed little swirls of white beneath her fingertips.

It seemed like even Girlfriend had her own secrets, but it wasn’t Updike’s business as he finished up the rest of his paperwork. Yes, actually finish. All while Boyfriend and Girlfriend now chatted about how polarized the internet sometimes seemed these days, especially with people making assumptions about things taken out of context.

Accept your body? Encouraging being unhealthy. Improve your body? Encouraging being fatphobic. No moderation, and no coexistence.

“Y’know, compared to where we came from, there are a lot more shades of gray,” Boyfriend mumbled, stabbing at a piece of cake.

Girlfriend exhaled, tapping her fingers against her cheeks. “You’re right. I dislike how my very existence is still a source of conflict though.”

Updike blinked and tilted his head up. “‘Still’?” The couple both glanced over at Updike, who cowered in place. “Ah, was I not meant to hear that?”

After a couple of reassurances, Girlfriend suddenly asked, “Hey Gabe~ Can I get a hug?”

“...I, ok sure?” Updike muttered, gulping when Girlfriend unabashedly made eye contact before playfully teleporting directly into his arms and sticking her tongue out at him. “Why are you like this.”

Girlfriend shapeshifted into a bird and flew back to Boyfriend with loud tweets of laughter. She shapeshifted back next to Boyfriend, glancing at him as if for confirmation before turning back to Updike. “You don’t know much about our pasts, do you?”

“I know you two are from a previous timeline, annnd dated and broke up before dating again, I think in this timeline? I also doubt you previously had your respective time and space powers…?” Updike tapped his pen against his mouth. “Bf is… surprisingly secretive now that I think about it, so I do not want-”

“I’ll talk about my experience then!” Girlfriend exclaimed, zoning out to think about what to bring up and missing both boys sweatdropping. “I was born a demon, and someone high ranking saw potential in me and helped with my powers. She was… honestly really protective of me.”

Updike perked up, even more question marks popping up when Boyfriend propped his cheek up and asked, “Oh yea I forgot about that. Hey babe, you think she still remembers?”

“Hmm, maybe? The prophecy was powerful enough that it only had to be cast once to affect the entire timeline so the outcome couldn’t be altered too much, and us arriving at this timeline feels a little sus if you catch my drift.” Girlfriend glanced at her ruby red nail polish, once again missing Boyfriend sweatdropping because he didn’t quite catch that last part. “Your powers also weren’t perfect, so I could see some of the memories slipping over when we traveled back.”

While Boyfriend joked about them then being the typical enemies to lovers plotline, Updike pondered over their words. Wait, so Girlfriend had an adoptive(?) parent(?) too? She did remind him of the gatekeeper, especially considering Boyfriend didn’t seem to have shapeshifting abilities, but the gatekeeper explicitly said to look for a human boy, which Girlfriend fit neither?

Updike asked Boyfriend even though he wasn’t human, and… well, it’s not like he knew Girlfriend’s biological sex (is that even a thing for demons???) if that was what the gatekeeper was talking about, so he wasn’t going to push it.

In fact, the two already moved on, Boyfriend joked about them being demi gods, to which Girlfriend winked. “Oh honey, I’m demi. Sexual, romantic, and girl.”

“You’re both demi???”

The two once again glanced over at Updike, who faltered as he intensely focused on scribbling his signature for his final document.

Boyfriend and Girlfriend giggled in unison, the latter explaining, “You thought the very concepts of time and space could be attracted to people without an emotional bond?” Girlfriend jokingly tsked before winking at Boyfriend. “I’m Bf-sexual .” Boyfriend quirked an eyebrow, to which Girlfriend pouted. “Fineee, I’m pan to Bf’s bi.”

Mind still stuck on processing Gf’s past, Updike was too tired to resist giving a blunt “That literally changes nothing for me.” Pause. “I meant good for you.”

“LMAO that’s far from the worst reaction I’ve seen.”

Updike hummed in affirmation, flexing his hands out of surprisingly boredom and wincing when they ached.

“Would you like a wrist brace?” Boyfriend asked Updike as Girlfriend teleported her cake back home.

“No. My wrist is not broken, and I am done for the day regardless.”

“Would you like one for the future?” Girlfriend followed up, also peeking over at Boyfriend who was more focused on stimming with one of Updike’s holed stamp sheets (or would Updike correct, stamp pane).

“No.”

The silence drew out once more.

Boyfriend held the stamp sheet up to the ceiling light before saying, “You know… I would like a back brace, and it would be neat if we matched~”

“That is not going to work on me again.”

“Mmm’kay~” Boyfriend finger gunned before turning serious. “I just… want you to think about it.”

Updike only stayed at his desk, watching Girlfriend making a plan to create a custom back brace for Boyfriend, doing a double take when noticing Girlfriend had hearing aids. He didn’t have the time to bring it up as the couple tinked together their ring and feather necklace respectively and moved on.

After Girlfriend asked Boyfriend how rigid he would like his back brace to be, Boyfriend got out a tray of diy easter eggs. “Hey Gabs, you wanna join us over here?”

Still curiously watching Girlfriend literally manipulate matter into the correct material right there and then, Updike took a seat next to them, hesitantly reaching for the closest pinkish paint color to help Boyfriend decorate the eggs.

Boyfriend showed off how he painted Updike as an egg, complete with cotton balls stuck as hair, and as Updike gradually got more comfortable, he did a magical trick of pulling an egg from Boyfriend’s ears.

Along the way, Girlfriend finished Boyfriend’s back brace, rewarded with a storm of electric thank you kisses from its recipient.

Updike adjusted his glasses while tilting his head. “May I ask you how many other… aids, do you have, Bf?”

“What, disability aids?” Boyfriend asked back, ignoring the way Updike tried to hide a wince. “More than you might think, my fidgets count as well, but this is one of my first back braces.”

“...Pardon?”

“I mean, is that so surprising? I think your contacts and glasses count as well,” Girlfriend casually added with a flick of their wrist.

That… wasn’t what Updike was referring to, but now he got distracted by the new topic. “Wait, what? No they do not. Wearing glasses is normalised, so I do not count as disabled.” Pause. “Well, on that front. I guess…?”

“I don’t care if it’s not legally one for you, but you can’t deny there are similarities.” Boyfriend shrugged, sitting on the ground and checking over his new back brace. “You need them to see, just like how someone might need disability aids to hear or I dunno, cough cough, move , and if you lose access to them, you’re screwed.”

Updike’s gaze darted for a moment to Girlfriend, who was currently more focused on making a nano tape squishy shaped like a cloud. “It… really is not as bad as you’re making it out to be.”

“Cool, a spectrum of vision impairment then! I doubt you’d deny someone glasses if their vision is only mildly f*cked,” Girlfriend chimed in, teleporting in a stack of fabric stickers, much to Boyfriend’s giddiness.

“Besides,” Boyfriend added while gathering a couple of paint swatches, “As much as society accommodates people with eyesight issues, I take issue with how people who wear glasses are always portrayed as losers. I mean, even if it’s not directly comparable, you also can’t tell me you don’t at least struggle a little updating your prescription.” Updike opened his mouth to respond, only to be cut off by Boyfriend cheering, “So I’m painting a bi flag on this!”

“...You lost me.” Updike unwittingly cringed as Boyfriend pasted a barrage of stickers and paint on his new brace. “Maybe you… shouldn’t do that. It’ll make it harder to wash, and the stickers will only scratch and peel.”

“These are magic , so you don’t gotta worry about it!”

As if proving Boyfriend’s point, Girlfriend threw a rainbow of confetti over them which magically phased out of existence when touching the ground.

“But…” Updike watched as Boyfriend pasted snippets of washi tape and pinned numerous badges on his back brace. “I… do not believe you are taking this seriously.”

“Nope! In fact I’m gonna name it straighten’t ,” Boyfriend exclaimed, painting a mini smiley face on the brace strap, raising an eyebrow when Updike didn’t share his passion. “Aw come on, none of this actually impacts its actual purpose, so why not?”

Girlfriend set their squishy next to Boyfriend’s painted eggs before swinging their legs back and forth. “Yea it’s so you , babe!”

Boyfriend beamed at Girlfriend when she patted his head. “Take that, Gabs! My back brace is gonna be cute and I’m gonna love it.” Updike glanced off, fighting the urge to say Boyfriend shouldn’t, to which Boyfriend stared at the intricate perfect design Updike painted for his easter egg. “Man, you really have set viewpoints on stuff like this huh?”

“What… do you mean.”

“My pain’s not static. There will always be good and bad pain days. I’m still working on it, but I don’t have to be ashamed of using mobility aids, nor do I have to be guilty if I don’t use them forever.”

“I do not need mobility aids.”

“Would you benefit though?” came the duo answer in unison, complete with identical looks of exasperation.

While Girlfriend muttered to herself about preventive care, Boyfriend continued, “I don’t want you to concede making your life just a bit more manageable only as a last resort? Does it take hitting rock bottom for you to change anything?”

Despite Boyfriend’s good intentions, that one cut deeper than it could have.

Updike exhaled, taking off his glasses and rubbing his aching eyes. “I will… think about it. Do not push it.”

“Sorry!” Boyfriend ran a finger over the empty patches of his back brace, redirecting by pulling out a list of flowers on his phone, “I want to add some embroideries, so… you wanna pick out a flower design, Brie?”

Stunned for a moment at the new nickname, Updike numbly pointed at the first sunflower design, ignoring the raging flush blotting his cheeks. After some embroidery tips from Girlfriend, Boyfriend prepped the various colored embroidery floss and got to work.

Updike awkwardly sat there, blinking when Girlfriend filled the silence with rambles of rainbow tables. Boyfriend might not have understood a thing, but he gave Girlfriend a dreamy look and latched onto the rainbow part of that.

Before long, Girlfriend brought up cryptography and steganography, to which Updike added he often avoided texting messages with the letter “E” in them due to frequency analysis. Girlfriend casually summoned a TV to play The Imitation Game movie, complete with subtitles. As Boyfriend finished up his embroideries, he and Updike also chatted about stenography (Yes Updike knew about it, no his handwriting would never be like a doctor’s).

Girlfriend stuck her tongue out in concentration to help Boyfriend fasten his back brace, wholeheartedly making heart eyes as Boyfriend scrambled to tell Updike about autoCAD and how he should totally meet Lila.

“Oh I think my batteries are running out,” Girlfriend commented, taking out their hearing aids and plinking the battery tablet in Boyfriend’s hair.

The only thing changing afterward is Boyfriend now furiously rambling through sign language, eliciting a small smile from Updike as he tried to keep up.

It was clearly a routine for them, so Girlfriend’s hearing aids weren’t a recent progression. Hmm… Well, Updike wasn’t going to pry. He snapped back to reality when Boyfriend waved a hand in front of his face before signing, “Hello? Are you with us?”

Updike nodded his fist for yes.

He squinted, trying to translate in his head what Boyfriend then signed. Something about security, something about emails? Even after asking Boyfriend to spell out the gesture he was most confused about, Updike was still wracking his brain on how each letter looked. That was a T, then an H, and some more letters- Wait was that a W??? Oh he was so rusty.

Boyfriend and Girlfriend exchanged an amused glance, and after a small chuckle, the latter said out loud, “You’re still allowed to talk , Gabe. In fact, I might even get going now, appreciate you making an effort for me too!”

Before Updike could process, Girlfriend blew Boyfriend a kiss and mashed his hair to get her batteries back before disappearing.

Huh… Updike watched as Boyfriend grumbled about his hair, literally coating his hands with electricity before smoothing his hair spikes back out. Huh. Updike subconsciously reached out, setting a hand on Boyfriend’s head and eliciting a quiet squeak from him.

“...my aPOLOGIES-” Updike blurted, withdrawing his hand and pursing his lips in embarrassment when Boyfriend turned and cheekily hugged his arm for a few moments before letting him go. “ Moving on … I was just curious, you still run cold. Whitty understandably heats up when using his powers and cools down afterward, and I know you countered his fire, so…”

“Oh I think I’m the same?” Boyfriend chuckled when question marks popped up all around Updike. “Yea, I made popsicles with Whits before and he questioned the same.”

“What- You have ice powers. You don’t cool down while using it?”

Boyfriend scratched his cheek. “Just like my electricity, nah. I call it ice, but technically, it’s more energy absorption? Particularly heat energy?”

A million thoughts ran through Updike’s mind like a swarm of bees.

“Okay… So you heat up by absorbing energy. Alright. Whitty cools down afterward due to depleted fuel, where does your absorbed energy go?” Updike gestured a hand before pointing at Boyfriend. “You always seem to run cold, so you are not actively expelling the energy back into the environment-”

“I mean, I could.”

“That is literally not the point-”

“In fact, even though it’s more tiring, I’ve honed that ability too! Especially when combined with my electricity!”

Updike deadpanned at Boyfriend before sighing. “You are a thermal equilibrium mystery. Fine. What about it.”

Boyfriend tapped his cheek. “See, I think Gf could only expel energy when using her powers. In a perfect world, I could only absorb energy, like, black hole style? However uh… my ‘robotic’ self overheats-”

“Your electricity and ice clash ???” Updike dragged a hand through his hair not like Boyfriend did. “I understand your family is associated with electricity, but where did your ice powers even come from???”

“It’s not really ice.”

“Ya didn’t even answer the question ,” Updike grumbled, too exasperated to stay formal. “...Is it personal?”

Crossing his arms and sinking against the back of the couch, Boyfriend stayed silent for a moment. “Um… Well on one hand, I have my more human abilities just amped up, pun not intended, so the electricity and music. On the other, the more godly abilities, so the time and absorption.”

Ok, it just came with him being a god, sure, that was definitely~ a satisfying answer and did not bring up even more questions about how he became a god, no siree.

Updike simply withheld a sigh, rubbing a knee before standing up to get everything in order for the night, such as cleaning and putting away his tea set. “Alright, what were you talking about, honing the ability to expel energy instead?”

Boyfriend also got up and stood next to Updike for no reason, casually admitting, “Right, so I actually use these two abilities in tandem. Oh, like that one time we helped you, I supplied you with some bioelectricity to help with your energy levels, well also the defibrillation part, then absorbed some of it back to numb the area for stitching.”

Updike’s pen clattered across the floor once again.

“‘Helped’?” Updike echoed, shutting his documents briefcase and facing Boyfriend. “You in particular saved me. You…” Updike bit back a swear, completely mortified while Boyfriend gave back his pen. “And that’s on top of counteracting Whitty’s heat- And that’s also not counting what happened while I recovered, because that was at your home? No wonder you were so… shaken. Oh no. Did you-”

“Hey, it was a while ago! I only brought it up because I thought you recovered, but I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have-”

“No this is about you ,” Updike cut in with the icy demeanor of a disappointed parent. “Did you then overwork yourself because I was taken out of commission?”

Boyfriend leaned against Updike’s work desk, absentmindedly stimming (positive or negative?) by drumming his fingers. “I… couldn’t, not really no. So I did take care of myself. Mostly.”

Updike hung his head, shadows looming over his eyes. Boyfriend shivered, bracing himself as Updike answered with the deepest tone he could muster, “We are heading back, and you are getting some kip.”

“Bruh it was long past, and hello? God of time-?”

“I do not care.” Updike grabbed Boyfriend’s hand and started leading him out the door. “And no teleporting. You have done enough of that today.”

Boyfriend tugged his hand back. “Y’know what? Stop treating me like a child. I know my limits better than you do.”

To Updike’s credit, he immediately softened. “Right. My apologies. Um…” Updike hugged his briefcase, allowing his shoulders to slack as he admitted, “...I, should do more, for you…? I’ve put so much on you, and I just… don’t know, what to do to… make it up.”

“Hm, I’ll take a nap if you do,” Boyfriend chuckled, holding out his hand.

“...Fine. I suppose that is the least I could do… Bee.” Boyfriend froze, to which Updike took his hand once more, playfully smirking and winking. “It is quite a cute nickname, but I suppose it is also Whitty’s thing. Maybe I should come up with another nickname? What do you say, little bean~?”

Nothing could have prepared Updike for the loud giddy beeps now echoing through the facility hallways.

*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*

“How could you betray me, betray us like this?” Whitty exclaimed, placing a hand on his own suit.

Updike got out a bow and arrow, stepping out of the crowd of villains before notching it and aiming it at Whitty. “It is for the greater good.”

Boyfriend slid in front of Whitty, also donning the familiar white suit. “No, you’re acting! We believe in you!”

“Tsk. It is too late-”

The facility living room door opened, and the real Updike stared at the situation before him. The other Updike morphed back to Girlfriend while the crowd of “villains” was revealed to be some of Updike’s own employees. Updike did a double take when realizing even Girlfriend, lo and behold, was wearing the familiar employee suit.

Updike turned back around, fully ready to slam the door in their faces, stopping when they all rushed towards him with apologies in between laughs.

“Reportin’ for duty sir!” the OG trio said while all saluting.

“The hiring team did NOT have my permission, so you can cut the act,” Updike dryly answered, propping himself against the doorframe and scanning over the sheepish crowd. “It is not yet work time, were you seriously all in on this?”

“Happy April Fools’ Day boss!”

Brain gears visibly cranking in place as he remembered what that was, Updike dragged his hands down his face when a couple of his employees tried and failed to stifle a snicker at his reaction. “All of you, get out of my sight.”

Updike’s actual employees, amusem*nt audible in their tones, scurried off like shooed pigeons. “Yes sir!”

After a brief pause, the OG trio wheezed at how absolutely done Updike looked. Updike rubbed between his eyebrows, groaning, “I thought you said you were going to ease up the bother.” Updike bristled when realizing the group wasn’t even listening to him, more focused on pasting stickers of their faces over the walls. “Wow, so mature. Did you even file your yearly taxes yet?”

“Yep~!”

“...Wait, really?”

Boyfriend in particular batted a hand at Updike. “C’mon, everything in moderation! We don’t always act childish and fool around, just, most of the time.”

Hugging Boyfriend’s head, Girlfriend added while replacing all but one of Updike’s pens with crayons with a snap of her fingers, “Yea it’s april fools . Have some fun!”

Updike gave a silent growl through gritted teeth before calming his initial rage down with a deep breath, particularly when Boyfriend and Girlfriend made sound effects to egg him on. “...I was not allowed to be as immature as this.”

“You sound bitter,” Whitty said, propping his head on top of Girlfriend’s to make an idiot stack. “You didn’t want to grow up so fast, did you. With all of the facility changes, it’s ok if you’re a little more carefree too.”

Before Updike could even process, Boyfriend grumbled at being squished and gave both Girlfriend and Whitty a static shock, brushing off his hands when they jokingly stumbled off with frizzy hair before playing his own laugh track on his phone. Updike stared at the way Whitty’s fuse spiked up like a paintbrush, sweatdropping and backing off when Girlfriend then buried the room in dryer static sheets. “Ok, but you better clean all of this up afterward.”

“You got it Updike~ ” Whitty laughed while the couple stuck their thumbs up out of the dryer sheet pile.

While Girlfriend teleported the dryer sheets away, Whitty inched over to Boyfriend and jokingly chomped his hair, to which Boyfriend batted Whitty’s face away and put him in a headlock for being naughty. After Girlfriend snuck off to do mischief , Boyfriend let Whitty go and headed off for pranks of his own, completely missing Whitty reaching over and clipping a balloon to his cap as a tracker.

As the balloon bobbed away, Whitty stood up, narrowing his eyes when spotting Girlfriend at the door frame. Whitty walked towards them, yelping when Girlfriend used their levitation powers to shift the table right in front of his path.

He grumbled, turning to the side to avoid the table, only for Girlfriend to levitate him to the perfect angle that he walked into the wall. “Oh come on . Way to bully your big bro.”

Girlfriend giggled as Whitty tried to take a seat on the closest office couch, only for it to disappear and reappear on top of his face when he toppled to the ground.

Whitty sighed, literally resigned to staying on the ground while Girlfriend moved on and popped in even more furniture .

Wriggling out from under the couch a few minutes later, Whitty stared at the sheer number of desks that were designed to stack on top of each other. Boyfriend stepped back in at that exact moment, squawking when his balloon tracker was revealed due to it getting caught on one of the desks.

Boyfriend also jokingly hissed as Girlfriend levitated all the furniture two inches to the left so that he would bump into them while marching toward Whitty.

Whitty, actually being able to sit on the couch now, blinked when Boyfriend handed him a computer keyboard, complete with both blue funky mushrooms and green living saplings growing from the crevices. A hand to his cheek, Whitty masked his sheer delightedness with snark, “Aw Bee, what kinda prank is this? When I get home you know I’m gonna plant all of these.”

“Mhm~” Boyfriend waved to Girlfriend, dragging her out the room to show her the wholesome prank of getting a roomful of flowers for her, to which Girlfriend distracted Boyfriend with a kiss and slipped a couple hundred dollars into his pockets in return.

By the time the couple came back, Whitty had sat on every furniture item, even the extra ones Girlfriend had summoned, deliberately making everything just the slightest bit uncomfortably warm. It was when Whitty, sat atop the highest desk stack, loudly sipped his lukewarm cola, did Girlfriend give Whitty the middle finger.

“You’re such a little sh*t!” Girlfriend snarked, floating up to Whitty and punching his arm.

“I’m not little, so… I’m the sh*t,” Whitty joked, laughing when Girlfriend visibly fought the urge to push him over the edge like a cat batting down a glass of water.

“Well you gotta admit he put a lot of time and energy into it,” Boyfriend chuckled as Girlfriend hauled Whitty and herself down to the ground.

While Girlfriend and Whitty started play-fighting due to Girlfriend trying to doodle on Whitty’s face, Boyfriend sat cross legged on the closest table and jokingly painted their scuffle on a small canvas.

When revealed, Girlfriend’s eyes sparkled. “Oh yeah ? Well watch this .”

Boyfriend sat next to Whitty, snickering when Whitty intensely ruffled his hair and ended up giving himself yet another electric shock. Girlfriend turned around her medium sized canvas, showing a painting of Boyfriend bluescreening while trying and failing to stifle a giggle at what’s to come. Boyfriend bluescreened.

After Boyfriend got a flurry of teases, his eyes also sparkled. “Oh YEAH ?”

Whitty watched as Boyfriend lugged out a giant sized canvas, 8-bit lo-fight emanating from himself in sheer amusem*nt at where this was going. Boyfriend flustered Girlfriend with a painting of her chowing down a vegan burger, and Girlfriend flustered Boyfriend right back by painting him in a wedding gown ON THE WALL .

While Boyfriend rushed to fill the other walls with a mural, Whitty stared into the imaginary camera with a deadpan expression. Well, it wasn’t quite imaginary, considering Updike peeked his head in to check on them and once again yearned to simply turn back around and pretend this never happened.

“I will turn the entire facility building into your face-”

“Gf, please do not do that.”

Girlfriend deflated with a grumble, “Aw, party pooper.”

Updike rolled his eyes before heading back to work, and the OG trio exchanged a glance and smirk with each other. Time to prank Updike then~

Girlfriend glued some coins to the ground and Updike’s work desk. Updike didn’t even look at said coins while passing by with a pile of paperwork. Boyfriend shuffled across the carpets to try to give Updike a static shock. Updike saw Boyfriend was busy and used literal hidden hallways instead to reach his next meeting. Whitty fired up his illusion powers and created bugs skittering across the walls. Updike unceremoniously got out the bug spray and grumbled when Whitty disabled the illusion.

They literally all doubted Updike even knew that those were pranks, but he didn’t fall for them regardless.

The trio teamed up to try to prank him instead.

Boyfriend distracted Updike with puns while Girlfriend teleported a whoopie cushion on Updike’s chair, to which Updike didn’t even sit on it due to either sitting too close to the edge or standing for a meeting.

Now Whitty distracted Updike by jokingly stealing his food while Girlfriend swapped the salt and sugar containers, to which Updike had literally zero reaction as he downed his salty coffee due to his prior experience.

Girlfriend even swapped Boyfriend and Whitty’s appearances without telling them, but Updike correctly addressed them anyway. In fact, it was Boyfriend and Whitty who confusedly stared at Girlfriend moping in the corner.

“You… could have told us. We would have acted like the other better,” Boyfriend flatly said after Girlfriend explained. “Ok no this isn’t working. How about we all collaborate for a prank?”

Which led to, Boyfriend and Whitty once again jokingly anguishing over how they were in danger while Girlfriend smacked invisible tape across the door frame. Updike understandably panicked, but he elegantly slid into the room with wide concerned eyes, furrowing his eyebrows as the trio all groaned at how he ducked under their prank.

“Ok absolutely not. There is no way you just accidentally did that again,” Whitty said, a hand over his mouth to hide his amusem*nt.

“In fact, I think he gets even more skilled under some level of panic,” Boyfriend grumbled, a soft complimenting tone under his snark. “It comes with the job.”

Girlfriend, on the other hand, immediately teleported a bucket of rainbow paint over the door with a playful grin. Not even waiting for Updike to possibly accidentally trigger it, Girlfriend dunked it over Updike’s head.

She was also the one to levitate Updike so he didn’t hit his head when he genuinely passed out , instantly removing the paint and rushing over in concern before Boyfriend and Whitty could react.

By the time the boys kneeled next to him, Updike was already cracking open his eyes alongside a sniff. “Ugh, what…?”

“I am so sorry,” Girlfriend exclaimed, their sheer unmasked dread mellowing out Updike’s annoyed mood. “I didn’t anticipate- I will never do that again, are you alright? What was that???”

“...I suppose, I still do not deal well with sudden cold.”

“I am so SO sorry.” After Whitty gently leaned Updike against his chest, Girlfriend bit the inside of her cheek and mumbled, “I should… Yea, that’s enough of those. I’m done for the day, promise.”

Updike hummed in affirmation. “I… understand I am quite guarded, particularly during my work hours. Due to my position, it would not be controversial to say people do not try to prank me. So…” Updike might not have been vulnerable enough to directly compliment them right there and then, but he did add a soft “You guys were silly~”

The trio exchanged a glance before sharing a laugh.

“Could we do a group hug?” Boyfriend asked, rubbing his hands to try to warm them up.

“Bring it in,” Updike answered, jokingly resigned as Whitty squished him closer and Boyfriend tackled him. Even Girlfriend reached out a hand and awkwardly patted Updike’s arm.

Updike fainted again.

The trio once again panicked. Girlfriend floated and set him on one of the numerous couches around while the boys fussed over him. Boyfriend was frantically beep booping, while Whitty intensely alternated between reaching out or leaving Updike be. Girlfriend batted a hand in exasperation while reassuring, “He’s fineee . Physically, that is. He probably just got overwhelmed. Again… So why worry?”

“Well too bad , you can’t hide your emotions from me-!” Boyfriend started, cutting himself off when Updike stirred once more.

Updike blearily blinked up at them before wordlessly grumbling and rubbing his face. “...Congrats, you ended up pranking me after all.”

His audience stared at him for a long while. The two siblings broke into giggles as Boyfriend waved through the air, weakly cheering, “Power of friendship!”

“Was this how you felt when I first collapsed from your hug, Bee?”

“Nostalgic~” Boyfriend hummed, sitting on the ground and propping his arms and head up against the couch cover. “Ok but in all seriousness, did you faint just because we hugged you?”

Draping an arm over his eyes, Updike gave a sigh that sounded like a deflating balloon. “Uh huh…” Pause. “Why did this only happen now …?”

Girlfriend literally stood on the couch armrest to look over Updike. “I said this before, and I’ll say it again. I’m glad you’re more comfortable around us now.”

Whitty sat next to Boyfriend, absentmindedly drumming the couch cover and pausing when Updike’s breath hitched. “Gabriel, are you… cryin’?”

“nO.” While Whitty muttered under his breath about how Updike was even more touch starved than he was, Updike focused on his breathing before stoning his expression and heaving himself into a sitting position. “My apologies. It… has been a long day, and… my back is not helping.”

“I’ll be your ice pack!” Boyfriend chirped while waving his hand in the air.

The moment Updike awkwardly said ok, Boyfriend scrambled over Updike and clung to his back like an oversized koala.

“Taste the rainbow motherf*cker,” Girlfriend immediately said, pressing a packet of M&Ms into Updike’s hands before he had the chance to process.

“Oh. Thank, you…?” Updike tilted his head when Whitty made grabby hands at him. “Alright, what now.”

“Wanna kissie?”

Updike sweatdropped, even more so when Girlfriend summoned a pile of googly eyes for Boyfriend to tape to his hair, joking about making him a biblically accurate angel. “I suppose I should feel honoured that you all care so much, you mischievous little plonkers. Alright, make it quick Whitty.”

Whitty zoomed in front of Updike with gleaming eyes.

Gulping and bracing himself, Updike squeaked when Whitty cupped his head and peppered his face with kisses. It wasn’t until Whitty smooched Updike’s nose again did Updike smack a hand against Whitty’s face. “Ok ok, that’s enough . Don’t make me faint again .”

“Awww~” Boyfriend cooed, leaning forward to squish his cheek with Updike’s. “You’re so warm, ya floofer~”

Updike batted Boyfriend away, burying his blushing face against his hands and flopping against the closest couch pillow when Whitty then teased him for it.

“Hey you know how Whitty calls me Gigs and Bf calls Gabe Gabs?” Girlfriend asked, eyes glowing red and grin spreading wide. “We should be called Gibs and Gags .”

Ok Boyfriend and Whitty groaned at that one, but Updike had to fight the urge to cry-laugh. He was truly being assimilated into the group, wasn’t he?

*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*

“I wonder where good ol’ ~Updike~ is. I did offer the idea that he joined us in a trainin’ montage,” Whitty joked while tapping his cheek, beaming as bright as the twinkling sunlight above when Updike slipped out of the nearby alleyway in curiosity.

“Did someone give me a bell?” Updike asked, accidentally startling Boyfriend and Girlfriend and needing to side-step Boyfriend throwing a punch at him. “Good to see you too.”

Boyfriend grumbled to himself at Updike’s barely hidden amusem*nt while Girlfriend explained with a wave, “Hey Gabe! We were just about to head to our little pocket dimension to train our powers, wanna come along?”

Updike pursed his lips for a moment, pulling out a notepad from his hair and skimming through his to do list. “Hmm. Might I ask how long this will take?” When even Boyfriend gave an uncertain hum and shrug, Updike exhaled in amusem*nt. Despite his initial instinct to deny, Updike embraced the unknown. “Alright, I am done with my patrols anyway. I do expect to be able to ask to leave at any time however.”

“Oh yes of course!” Girlfriend chirped, throwing her hands up and the world around them melting into white expansiveness.

Silently questioning how the training session was going to pan out, Updike observed as Whitty summoned a couch to plop down on while Boyfriend and Girlfriend stretched in place. Ah, duo teamwork it is.

Girlfriend went semi demon form with purple skin and horns, while Boyfriend pulled out the green eyes and freckles. A few generic enemies spawned into the area, and the couple both held out their hands in anticipation.

Updike noticed as health bars popped atop Boyfriend and Girlfriend, and how there were hp loss indications when Girlfriend literally zoomed in and punched an enemy in the face.

The couple was eerily silent as they zipped around defeating enemies. Girlfriend skewered an enemy with her heels, teleporting away from attacks or slingshotting attacks back through levitation. Boyfriend dove under a similar attack, electricity buzzing around him as he also teleported around or engulfed attacks in a green hue before sending them right back through time rewinding.

When honing onto a single enemy, in true fnf fashion, Girlfriend summoned their speakers while Boyfriend summoned his microphone.

Girlfriend puppeteered the speakers around, creating fiery shockwaves to disorientate enemies, and Boyfriend shot electrified arrow attacks while wholeheartedly rapping. In fact, Girlfriend cranked up the speaker volume while Boyfriend metaphorically flexed all over his opponent instead of copying their verses.

There was the sound of Whitty cheering “pop OFF !!!” in the distance.

“Hm, not bad there babe.”

“Not bad there yourself,” Boyfriend chirped, a green wave rippling through his body as he nudged the fallen enemy. Girlfriend stole a kiss, and Updike intensely blinked when both of their health bars increased because of it.

When another crowd of enemies swarmed towards them, the couple winked at each other and pulled out their respective weapons.

Boyfriend spun his sleek scythe to deflect an attack while Girlfriend shot flaming arrows from her crescent shaped bow. Like clockwork, they both spun their weapons, with Boyfriend now splitting his scythe into dual words, and Girlfriend’s bow now looking like a full moon design shield.

As Boyfriend coated himself and his swords with electricity to pinball through the enemies, Whitty was in the background, jokingly posting scores in his eyes. Updike was scribbling notes, absentmindedly asking, “Why does Bf even have a scythe. They were designed for reaping grain, therefore they are inefficient in combat.”

“Oh he’s not a fighter, as ironic as that sounds,” Whitty answered, cheering when Boyfriend literally altered his own character file colors for invisibility before turning back to Updike. “Besides, ya can’t deny it’s cool.”

“...I suppose not.” After Boyfriend and Girlfriend did dorky dances of victory, the former plopped down next to Updike on the couch, and Updike immediately turned to him and asked, “How does your teleportation work?” Boyfriend blinked as Updike batted at his paper notes. “I know you can travel by electricity and ‘anchor’ your teleport locations to a specific electronic device, but at the same time, you do not appear to be limited?”

Boyfriend swung his legs back and forth as Whitty stood up to join Girlfriend for the next round. “Well… I mean I never really thought about it. Even Whits never asked.”

“Wow, Whitty, the nearly nine foot living bomb, did not question you not being human.”

“Don’t get snarky with me, mister!” Boyfriend said while pointing a finger at Updike, who raised an unimpressed eyebrow. A chuckle later, Boyfriend shrugged. “Alrighty, yea you’re right. I still need to work on it, but theoretically I should be able to teleport anywhere because this world takes place in an electronic. Y’know, hence source code and stuff.”

Girlfriend and Whitty accidentally creating a fire explosion in the background was the perfect representation of Updike’s existential crisis.

Updike gave a defeated sigh, turning his attention to the two siblings as a distraction. Speaking of which, the two of them simply stared at each other with fire in their eyes.

When a crowd of enemies popped up and charged towards them, Girlfriend floated Whitty into the air and literally heaved him into the crowd to scatter and topple the enemies.

Whitty used fire blasts from his hands to stand back up, sweeping a circle around him which blew up into a fire column for shielding.

“Y’know, I still don’t approve of that one,” Whitty grumbled, jokingly displaying spirals in his eyes as Girlfriend zoomed above him using her demon wings, adding fuel to his fire as a bonus.

“Well get used to it bruh!” Girlfriend sing-songed, luring an enemy closer and diving behind Whitty so he could tank the attack before popping out and ramming through the crowd with their horns. “Seriously Whitty, you’re too soft~ to protect the ones you love-”

“Oh I’ll show you .”

Whitty let out an ear splitting scream, stunning the enemies and tearing through reality. He swiped his hands full of fire, slamming them into the ground. Each splatter of lava leaked through reality, an endless tapestry of holes.

While Girlfriend jokingly bonked an enemy with a traditional demon trident, Whitty punted a few enemies into the stratosphere. The entire world was overtaken by Whitty’s neon design, and Whitty used his illusions to distract enemies as he blasted them into the void.

Girlfriend even flew by, patching up the cracks in reality with lava and “accidentally” bumping into enemies so they brushed against the sealant and burned to a crisp.

Peeking over at Updike, Boyfriend stifled a laugh at how giddy Updike’s eyes were at the various displays of fire acrobatics that followed.

During a small break, Girlfriend zoomed next to Whitty and punched his arm.

“I swear , if Bee wasn’t the main rapper between the two of you, you alone would claim the title of most annoyin’,” Whitty groaned, swatting Girlfriend back and hissing when Girlfriend swooped back around and blew a mocking raspberry at him. “You get back here .”

Updike watched the two siblings tackling and wrestling each other, cringing despite their health bars actually increasing from the fighting. Well, he couldn’t deny that they were… fiery. Updike stifled a chuckle at his own thoughts, glancing off when he could feel Boyfriend beaming at him.

Boyfriend stood up, pacing in place as a stim, happily beep booping to cheer on his closest friends.

“Gigs you’re supposed to focus on the enemies, not ME ,” Whitty yelled, jokingly grabbing Girlfriend and shaking them like a ragdoll, only for another Girlfriend to appear next to him filing their nails. “Oh come on .”

Girlfriend winked, and a couple more clones of her appeared around Whitty as if to make up for their size difference. “Bet you-”

“Bet YOU can’t defeat more enemies than me!” Whitty cut in with a smirk, firing up propellant on his hands and feet in order to blast into the air. In the background, Boyfriend was light enough that he got blown back and Updike comically had to act as his cushion.

Updike rubbed his head, sitting Boyfriend back down on the couch before watching the two siblings both flying through the air, individually picking off enemies like osprey catching fish.

So much for teamwork , but hey, at least they got the job done.

When they finally descended, still playfully shoving at each other, Updike couldn’t help but berate, “Hey, be nice.”

Girlfriend and Whitty grumbled in unison, the former teleporting next to Updike as Boyfriend ice skated next to Whitty, gently bumping against his side for the final round.

Tapping his pen against his cheek, Updike muttered, “If I am correct, Whitty converts the food he eats into fuel. I do not believe your powers operate the same way, Gf?” Updike gestured his pen towards Girlfriend, who bopped in place with a blank expression. “It appears like you are an energy source, internally fueling yourself while maintaining stable mass.”

“You could call me a star~”

Updike took it at face value, curiously humming to himself. “Nuclear fusion then? Hydrostatic equilibrium? I suppose it explains why out of the trio, you use your powers the most. It is only natural due to your energy production.”

“Do you think the world will get f*cked if my powers got sealed so I wouldn’t be able to release all this energy?” Girlfriend casually asked, giggling at the sheer dread now on Updike’s face. “Or maybe the world will end anyway the moment I run out of fuel?”

“...”

“Eh who knows, maybe Bf would just get my powers and vice versa. He was supposed to be able to control ice directly after all.” Girlfriend shrugged, floating through the air as if untethered in space before bluntly finishing, “But I doubt you’ll live long enough for that, so don’t worry.”

Maybe Updike should stop asking questions lest he face yet another existential crisis.

Time to focus on Boyfriend and Whitty now, back to where this all began. Boyfriend inhaled, sublimation wisps steaming off of his body, while Whitty exhaled, burning smoke drifting out of his mouth.

Whitty’s fire burned hotter to match Boyfriend’s hair, and his eyes crystallized to white as if his third eyelids were still shielding them from smoke.

Boyfriend was the first to zip into action, leaving behind trails of his signature feathery ice like the ice encompassing a freezing bubble.

Speaking of bubbles, he created time bubbles around a group of enemies before siphoning their life energy like the icy grips of death. Meanwhile, Whitty’s stretch marks glowed blue from his inner fire as he swiped his arms in a circle, creating a fire bubble to scorch wilting enemies.

Despite both of their individual powers having a short range distance, Boyfriend and Whitty created a fireball encased in a prison of ice, catapulting with a combined electricity and fire explosion to pelt the enemy in ice shards and boiling steam.

“Take that!” Whitty cheered, scooping Boyfriend up and giving him a tight bear hug.

Updike winced when Boyfriend’s back crackled at the motion, but Girlfriend simply batted his concerns away as Whitty immediately fussed over Boyfriend.

Even in the midst of attacking enemies, Boyfriend teleported next to Whitty to dust off his hoodie, or Whitty zoomed next to Boyfriend to tuck his hair back, health increase or not.

“Lights out!” Boyfriend yelled, and the dimension blacked out as if the earth was engulfed in crow feathers, much to Girlfriend’s glee and Updike’s confusion.

Updike squinted his eyes, finding comfort in Whitty’s beaming eyelights as Boyfriend literally echolocated his way through the darkness. A whisk of ice. A flash of fire. A buzz of static.

Whitty jokingly handed Boyfriend a nightlight to power as the white expansiveness crept back in.

The surrounding enemies were all covered in black spider webs, and any attempts to remove them led to the webs reforming and adhering even more.

“What the bloody hell is that.”

After their cheering, Girlfriend spammed teleportation all around Updike in excitement. “It’s their version of soot tags! Whitty brings along and burns some fabric, and Bf’s static chains the soot together. Annnd between Whitty’s convection and Bf’s preparation, it coats the enemies!”

“...What.”

Boyfriend and Whitty didn’t even notice Updike’s sheer bewilderment, yelling in unison, “This is our song to finish!”

They bumped their foreheads together (with Updike noticing how Boyfriend was eerily floaty ) before leaning against each other and linking pinkies.

Girlfriend put up a forcefield around her and Updike as a vortex of electric fire surged up around Boyfriend and Whitty.

Their echoing laughter could be heard funneling up the vortex as they danced across the area, the electric fire offering both offense and defense.

Boyfriend and Whitty stopped, synching as they shrunk the vortex down to a ring before working together to hurl it out like an electrified tornado of fire, whisking every enemy away.

After a fistbump, Boyfriend and Whitty just focused on having fun, something Girlfriend joined a few minutes in.

Like old times, Whitty animated a butterfly that soared across flat surfaces, and Girlfriend brought the actual drawing to life, letting it flutter around the three of them. Unlike old times, Boyfriend actually gathered up the courage to add one of his own: a 2D butterfly soaring in 3D like a projected hologram.

After Boyfriend joked about having hologram versions of himself to sing acapella songs, he questioned whether Whitty’s fire could also turn green or purple to match his ballistic poses, to which Girlfriend plopped a piece of copper and potassium in each of Whitty’s hands.

When Whitty flamed both metals, his fire became green and purple respectively.

“I don’t think you can ever not amaze me,” Boyfriend breathlessly said, chuckling when Updike also inched over with awed eyes.

In contrast, Girlfriend gave a joking, “K.”

“Oh shut up Gf, I already can’t escape chemistry lessons because of Miku.”

While the couple playfully bantered about it, Updike sat next to Whitty, thinking over his questions before finally settling on, “Whitty, what do you want to eat?”

“The souls of the innocent,” Whitty joked after a startled laugh.

“A donut!”

“You mean a bagel ,” Girlfriend corrected, grinning when Boyfriend glared at them.

“I do not. I donut.”

Girlfriend reached out and flicked Boyfriend’s cap, lightheartedly responding, “ You need to shut up.”

“ Nooo .”

Whitty snorted, turning back to Updike. “But in all seriousness, I’ll think about it. I’m alright for now.” Pause. “Speakin’ of souls, do you believe in reincarnation-”

“Do not ,” Updike cut in, stretching his notepad over his head as if covering his ears, shutting his eyes when Whitty raised an imaginary eyebrow. “I cannot take any more existential crises today.”

“Oops~” Boyfriend and Girlfriend said in unison, the latter floating their butterfly on Updike’s head like a bowtie while the former redirected, “Hey what’s that notepad thingie you’ve got?”

Updike’s face lit up in childish giddiness as he opened his mouth to ramble, only for him to shut it with a click as his hair darkened. Whether he was thinking about his childhood, or his job, or something else entirely, the trio would never know.

“Oh. It is… simply me taking notes. On your powers.”

Whitty plopped down on his stomach, poking Updike’s side while teasing, “Look at this nerd.”

“Ok listen -”

“We’re listenin’~”

Updike intensely stared at Whitty for a few moments before deflating, not even bothering to defend himself as he splatted his notepad on Whitty’s face.

Whitty cackled, flipping through the pages while showing Boyfriend and Girlfriend their respective note sheets. As Updike curled up into a pile of embarrassed mush, Whitty very lighthearted snarked, “Lol f*ckin’ NERD . I wonder if even your pets can recite Pi to the hundredth digit.”

“What the bloody hell does that mean,” Updike hissed, softening when Whitty gave him the softest little shoulder pats as affection.

By contrast, Boyfriend complimented “These notes are so detailed! Oh I’m so gonna try some of these proposed techniques out in the future, thank you so much!” before barreling into Updike, knocking every molecule of air out of his lungs.

While Whitty plucked Boyfriend away from the groaning Updike, Girlfriend shrugged at the imaginary camera in exasperation.

“You are both brutal ,” Updike said, giving a weak cough as he sat back up, sweatdropping when Girlfriend got up in his face, actually taking offense she wasn’t included. “Ok ok fineee . You are all redoubtable.”

“Heck yea I am,” Girlfriend chuckled, hands glowing red as her butterfly danced around her before nudging everyone to their feet.

Whitty, ever competitive with Girlfriend, summoned more butterflies of different neon colors, to which Girlfriend added firework effects around hers. The two of them put on a full on light show to impress Updike with how much they could control their powers, a show that involved them producing beautiful arcs of fire to accentuate the effects.

The delicate crackles. The intricate patterns. The chaotic flames.

Updike had to remind himself not to jaw drop as he watched them literally playing with fire, alternating between countering and fueling each other’s fire.

As Updike felt his sweat soaking through his fur, he snapped back to reality, blinking when realizing Boyfriend hadn’t said a word since they started.

“Bf-” Updike cut himself off, eyes widening as he noticed Boyfriend holding his hands out, electricity erratically and painfully sparking around him. “...Bf?”

“stop…” Boyfriend strained, dizzily losing his footing.

Updike hugged Boyfriend close, his fur acting as a cushion against the electricity. Covering Boyfriend’s other ear with a hand, Updike gave a piercing whistle. “You two, stop right now .”

Girlfriend and Whitty instantly ceased their fire, ironic chills running down their spines when they saw Boyfriend slumped against Updike, trying to catch his breath.

As Whitty rushed over, Girlfriend actively stopped floating and sped- walked next to them. Updike had already sat back down, resting Boyfriend’s head in his lap and twirling his hair while asking, “Are you quite alright, Bf?”

“...Yeah. Thanks.”

“Are you ALRIGHT ???” Whitty blurted, visibly unsure of where to stand or what to do with his hands, shutting his mouth when Girlfriend casually tugged him down into a sitting position next to them.

“He’ll recover,” Girlfriend answered, with even Updike glancing over at them fiddling with the hem of their dress. “...Bf, do you want to… tell them?”

“What. Tell what. Bee, what was that. Are you sure you’re alright.”

Boyfriend gave a heavy sigh, gesturing for Girlfriend to go ahead, and Updike couldn’t help but frown in empathy at how cagey he was.

“...Um.” Girlfriend turned to Whitty, accidentally and intensely making eye contact while admitting, “Bf and I are supposed to balance each other out energy wise. You… were literally made outside of this world.” Whitty froze, subconsciously shoving his hands back into his pockets. “Your- Well, our , energy output, kinda… puts a strain on him. Babe I’m so sorry, I knew , and I-”

“Oh I was so mad when we got to this timeline,” Boyfriend deliriously laughed as if he had too much to eat before putting a hand over his face, hiding a smile when Updike subconsciously rested his hand on top. “I’m not mad at you, honest, and definitely not you, Whits. Ever since the beginning, we’ve been pitted against each other as enemies.”

“I… don’t want to be your enemy-”

Boyfriend heaved himself up by jokingly shoving Updike’s face, tackling Whitty in a hug. “I know. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier.”

“...I’m sorry you have to deal with this.”

“Eh it’s not that bad, it never came up before since I’ve been managing-” Boyfriend cut himself off when Whitty returned the hug, burying his face against the crook of his neck.

Girlfriend shuffled a couple of inches away, leaning back on her hands, giving an apologetic, “I’m going to hold off using my powers for a little bit as well.”

“Thanks…”

As Girlfriend and Whitty teamed up to smother Boyfriend in verbal and physical affection respectively, Updike dusted himself off and got up, trying to give them a distraction, “Well, I suppose it is my turn, no?” The trio blinked as Updike stretched in place, explaining, “I want to train my reflexes and weaponry, if that is alright with you guys.”

Updike squinted in exasperation when the trio literally got on the couch from before, passing around popcorn, with Boyfriend even giving him a thumbs up. Exhaling, Updike stared at his hands, donning starry eyes when realizing that just like before, he could summon whatever weapons he imagined.

He snapped to work mode the moment a swarm of enemies emerged.

Oh did he say work mode? He meant murder mode.

Ice? Slide. Zip. Normal bullet. Done.

Fire? Dodge. Zoom. Ice bullet. Done.

Electric? Swerve. Duck. Analyse.

Pause. Bow. Arrow through the neck. Done.

The trio- No. This was Updike’s story now.

Off balance. On purpose. Coil back.

Roundhouse kick. Mid twirl catch.

Aim. Fire. Brace. Empty. Reload.

Updike heaved the gun into an enemy, letting the muzzle burn their face.

Stab through the weak point. Use the momentum to flip. Clamp another enemy to terminate.

Weave. Twirl. Jump-

Updike faltered with that one, his deadly eyes locking onto Whitty’s when Whitty realized and stabilized him. He took a quick peek back at Boyfriend and Girlfriend before softening. “Thanks Whitty. I am alright.” His smoking gun transforming into a tranquilizer gun, Updike faced the enemy crowd. “Let’s dance .”

Sliding in front of Whitty, Updike kicked the closest enemy to the side with a single leg, letting the momentum carry him forward once more.

After Whitty returned to his seat, Updike’s expression switched back to stoicism.

Lunge. Sweep. Counter.

Straight punch. Reverse kick. Handcuff twirl.

Grabbed.

Back flip. Spring off. Parry attacks.

Springing cartwheel kick. Jab cross hook uppercut. Kicking open defence blocking.

Updike bounced a tranquilizer dart off of a physical attack, simultaneously defending himself and neutralizing an enemy in the crossfire.

The distant sound of cheering was echoing through the dimension.

Twirling his gun, Updike actually smirked when an enemy twice his size barreled into the area.

He literally climbed them, swinging away from any punches. He danced on top of them, balancing on their shoulders. He hauled them down, leveraging his weight and size difference.

“Check. Mate .”

One final tranquilizer dart later, Updike spun around, standing in classic ballet turnout as he bowed to the trio.

The trio remained silent.

“Wait, should I have said, checkmate, mate? Because ‘mate’ is-”

Boyfriend shrieked , circling his fist in the air, and Whitty literally had to yoink him before he could tackle Updike to the ground once again. Girlfriend only exhaled in amusem*nt.

Whitty, with a pouting Boyfriend tucked under his arm, walked next to Updike and gave him a pat on the head. “Show off.” Updike scratched a blushing cheek. “God, you’re so deadly .”

“And you didn’t even let your imagination run wild!” Boyfriend added, swinging his arms back and forth to gesture Girlfriend over. “Like, Gabs, you could have gotten so many more weapons, quantity and variety wise!”

“Seriously Gabriel, were you even tryin’ back when you wanted to kill us?”

Updike blinked, hair darkening a smudge as he dissipated his tranquilizer gun. “Here is the thing: I do not want to indulge in more violence. I have done enough of that in real life. However… as I am sure you can imagine, I totally forgot what that felt like, to genuinely… enjoy a good brawl.” Updike tiptoed to Boyfriend’s delight, immediately ballet twirling in place and elegantly slowing to face them again with a frown. “I do not think I will ever not be dangerous on some level.”

“Cool, join the club,” Whitty chuckled, even more so when Updike froze as if forgetting who he was talking to. “Besides, you bein’ ~dangerous~ but still stickin’ to your morals when given the chance to? That just proves you’re not harmless, you’re peaceful.”

“...”

After Whitty set Boyfriend down, Boyfriend jumped and clung to Updike like a koala, babbling in beep bops.

Updike instinctively supported him, intensely blushing when Boyfriend complimented him on his skills and deflecting, “No Bf, no. I truly am not as fluid as I used to be. I believe you of all people would understand.”

“But you’re still so f*cking skilled , oh man, give yourself more credit! You had such awful associations with fighting, and now you’re so passionate about improving your skills???” Boyfriend practically cried, clinging tighter while Updike helplessly glanced at Whitty, who, taking after Girlfriend’s gremlin vibes, didn’t do anything to help.

Speaking of Girlfriend, she joined the group, adding, “At the same time, it’s true you’ll never really go back to how you used to be physically wise. Your limbs suffered a lot of scarring-”

“So it’s even more impressive,” Boyfriend cut in, climbing over Updike before sitting on his shoulders for a piggyback ride, smooshing Updike’s hair over his face. “I’m not saying you should push yourself until you’re back to ‘normal’, in fact it’s only natural you’re mourning the past. I’m just saying, you’re doing the best you can in this f*cked up health system we’ve got and that’s awesome .”

While Updike was processing Boyfriend’s words, Girlfriend bluntly said while fanning herself, “Oh I was also gonna add: Gabe, that was hot, AND cold.” Girlfriend mimed the way Updike coldly sliced through an enemy.

Updike’s face filled with a startled blush on top of his original blush, a hand over his shy smile when Boyfriend and Whitty jokingly facepalmed in unison.

“But in all seriousness, I didn’t know you were also an archer!” Girlfriend continued, red sparkles in her eyes and fists clenched in giddiness.

“I am indeed a toxophilite.”

Updike gave a deflating noise when he accidentally killed the conversation, but unsurprisingly, Boyfriend messed with Updike’s hair and exclaimed, “YO come join us for a game night some day, you should totally check out Celeste!”

*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*

Which was why Updike found himself sitting on the sleeper sofa while the trio emptied a mountain of possible games to play.

Updike shuffled through a couple of nintendo cartridges, feeling completely out of his depth regarding what any of these games entailed, and Boyfriend and Whitty actually left to make some dinner.

Girlfriend bopped in place, a glint in her eyes as Updike squinted at a game title, trying to analyze its wording. She levitated the cartridge away from Updike’s hands, earning her a deadpan expression.

Flinging her hand up, the pile of games stuck to the ceiling.

“...Gf, I literally cannot jump. I am going to go ask Whitty-”

As if Girlfriend suddenly removed the gravity in the room, Updike began floating alongside his sofa. Updike clung to his sofa for dear life, calming when it settled in place, albeit literally halfway in the air.

After patting the table floating next to him to confirm the stability, Updike parkoured from furniture to furniture, reaching up to grab the nearest cartridge… only for Girlfriend to shift it away again .

Updike felt like a cat trying to catch the red laser dot.

A few more failed attempts later, Updike changed tactics, dropping to tackle Girlfriend, only to give a soft “oof” when she intercepted him with the full couch . Updike defeatedly faceplanted with a loud sigh.

“What’s going on-?” Whitty asked, immediately bonking his head on the floating coffee table. Boyfriend also peeked in, sweatdropping at the sight.

Before anyone could continue, the fire alarm went off.

Girlfriend’s powers stopped in surprise.

Wait, but there wasn’t even any smoke-

Boyfriend shoved Whitty back before zipping forward, reaching a hand out to Updike to protect him from the falling furniture. However, Updike actually yoinked Boyfriend’s cap, propelling himself up to the fire detector and snuffing the sound out.

Despite Updike calmly handling the situation, Boyfriend’s eyes widened at the possibility of him being in danger, and an electric blast filled the room as they teleported away.

The four of them appeared in a fancy living room, all decked out in gold. It wasn’t Hex’s, and it wasn’t Updike’s. It was-

“Why are we at the Dearests’ place ?!” Whitty whisper-hissed, eyes instantly spiraling between symbols in panic as Girlfriend wilted in place.

While background sounds of crocodiles snapping their jaws in the moat accompanied Boyfriend’s panicked apology, Girlfriend teleported all of them back to the training dimension.

Updike put a hand to his head, disoriented from the teleportation. He gradually recovered, watching as the trio huddled with each other trying to calm each other down. Boyfriend and Whitty were clinging to each other, and Girlfriend’s blank expression told Updike she dissociated from the chaos.

Oh… dear.

Instantly taking control of the situation, Updike asked, “I do believe your fire detector is in need of a battery replacement. Do you happen to, by any chance, have backups?”

“...I think we’ve got some in storage,” Whitty muttered, to which Updike gave a stiff nod, watching Boyfriend shuffling over to Girlfriend instead.

“Whitty, would you be comfortable joining me in sorting out the issue?”

After Whitty silently got up and Boyfriend pressed a black feather in his hands to be teleported back to them, Updike pulled out a literal 4 gas monitor from his hair just in case.

Girlfriend teleported Whitty and Updike back home, and after Updike double checked that the fire alarm really was just faulty, the two of them rummaged through the closest and brought out new batteries.

Whitty held Updike up to the fire detector, wincing for a moment when Updike unveiled its screaming, but exhaling in relief when Updike swapped out the batteries and screwed the lid back on.

Updike did a final checkover of the rooms before meeting up with Whitty, who had gone to get Boyfriend and Girlfriend.

A period of awkward silence later, Boyfriend gestured at Updike’s monitor and blurted, “You have a… that ???”

“Oh, quite. These are commonly used to ensure user safety.” Updike shrugged, picking up Boyfriend’s cap and putting it back on his head the “right” way. “It is necessary because I do indeed work in confined spaces for specific targets.”

Boyfriend fell silent. Girlfriend and Whitty took the distraction to tease Boyfriend for wearing his cap the proper way for once, and Updike mentally noted to himself to properly dispose of the old batteries while dusting off a fallen couch pillow.

Likewise, the trio began working together with Updike to clean up the room, although they gave up halfway and shoved all the furniture to the far ends and piled the games and pillows in the center.

Updike went along with it, plopping the final pillows on the pile before taking a seat next to the trio.

“So… Celeste!” Boyfriend exclaimed, bringing up the game and tilting his head towards the screen.

“Hey Whitty, we should play a horror game in the meantime!”

Scooching next to Boyfriend, Updike turned to Girlfriend and asked, “Do you not want to relax?”

Girlfriend scrolled through her collection of horror titles. “Horror games do help me relax. It’s a nice distraction, and I love the adrenaline and catharsis.”

“It’s not like that for everyoneee,” Whitty jokingly cried, batting Girlfriend with a pillow.

While Girlfriend and Whitty bantered over what game to play, settling on fnaf security breach for a more comedic horror game, Updike turned his attention to Celeste, freezing when Boyfriend gave him the controls.

“...My dear, I do not know how to play.”

“I’ll teach you!” Boyfriend’s cheer was contrasted with Whitty’s muffled shriek at a very obvious jumpscare due to Girlfriend charging the character through the pizzaplex.

Surprising or not, Updike didn’t get very far with the controls.

Boyfriend couldn’t help but giggle at the way Updike intensely squinted at the controller every two seconds trying to remember what each thing does.

Updike, getting distracted by Whitty and Girlfriend wheezing in unison because glamrock freddy clipped through a door, said to Boyfriend, “I do not think this is working for me. I know I could probably figure it out given time, but… no offence, this is not something I feel inclined to master.”

“Oh, want me to turn on assist mode then?” Boyfriend asked, taking the controller back and navigating back to the menu.

“What? Oh, no, that is not for me. I am just… terrible at these games.” Updike ran a hand through his hair, glancing off.

“Hm. That’s honorable. The game is intended to be challenging, that’s literally a narrative thing, so assist mode doesn’t capture the exact vision the devs intended.” Boyfriend pulled up assist mode on the screen anyway. “At the same time, I personally think you should be allowed to play however you want. I doubt you’re gunning to be a Celeste speedrunner or anything like that, so for any reason, just wanting to see the story, just wanting to skip past the hard parts, just having a bad day and wanting the invincibility, I think you should be allowed to alter the game to suit your desires and needs.”

Updike glanced down at his gloved hands for a moment. “I understand altering the game to suit someone’s needs, but desires too?”

Boyfriend shrugged, gesturing with his controller. “You can disagree with me on that one, but yep. I mean, I don’t encourage people to equate assist mode with easy mode and just immediately give up, but I also don’t want to discourage people from enjoying themselves. Ultimately it’s their call.” He also glanced down at Updike’s hands for a moment. “Besides, desire or not, I think it would benefit you accessibility wise.”

Crossing his arms, Updike gave a soft hum of acknowledgment. “...I want to be her.” Boyfriend and Updike both blinked. “I mean like, her journey as I currently know of it, is admirable, and…” Updike trailed off rubbing his temples while shutting his eyes. “My apologies. I believe I am undergoing a headache from the game movement.”

“No worries-!”

Whitty gave a loud electric guitar twang when Girlfriend got to the weeping angel endo section, yeeting himself away and faceplanting when slipping on a pillow before claw gripping a pile of plushies.

While Updike fought the urge to rub his eyes, Boyfriend waded through the pillow pit and patted Whitty’s head. When Whitty peeked up, Girlfriend accidentally ran into an endo and triggered a jumpscare, causing Whitty to smother his face with his hood, hearts beating so fast he glowed neon through it.

Updike also startled a little, acting on autopilot and doing the seat belt mom arm in front of the boys, rolling back like a pillbug when the danger was over.

Grumbling and pointing at Girlfriend to emphasize his point, Whitty dragged his other hand down his face when Girlfriend jokingly chomped at his finger. “Alright, I’m done. Bee, go handle your gremlin.” Boyfriend saluted with a laugh, and Whitty turned to Updike with a joking “Ya got games on your phone?”

“Do I need to answer that.”

Whitty chuckled, grabbing his different plushies and casually handing a bee plushie to Updike. “Here I’ll show you some of mine!” Whitty flopped on his stomach, pulling out his purple phone and patting the spot next to him. Updike hesitantly lay next to Whitty, eyes half lidded as he grappled with his headache.

In the background, Boyfriend and Girlfriend were playing rock paper scissors and tying consecutively due to both cheating using their powers. Whitty and Updike didn’t even try to reason why the couple then settled on chess of all things.

Unsurprisingly, Whitty showed Updike a minimum of five cat related app games.

Updike curiously hummed at the various mental health and music apps Whitty had, stifling a chuckle when Whitty went back to cute cat games and shoved the classic neko atsume in his face.

“Look look, this one is named Gabriel!” Whitty exclaimed, pointing at the screen, not even realizing his finger blocked half of it. “Also, do you like puzzle games? Board games?”

Speaking of board games, Updike glanced over at Boyfriend and Girlfriend, blurting, “Okay WHAT is that.”

Oh, so the couple didn’t settle on chess. They settled… on 5D chess with multiverse time travel .

After Boyfriend explained the premise, Girlfriend boasted, “If this was regular chess, I would crush all of you, hands down.”

“Not much of an accomplishment when it comes to me,” Whitty flatly said, now also staring at their chess game, eliciting a small huff from Girlfriend.

“Gabs, you and I should have a regular match someday. No powers, no gimmicks, no pressure!” Boyfriend proposed before glancing back at Girlfriend’s moves, eyebrows twitching when he realized he lost.

While Updike and Whitty tried to comprehend the game states, Girlfriend cooed, “That’s what you get when playing against the god of space.”

Boyfriend gave a defeated sigh, hair spikes jokingly wilting. Updike frowned, awkwardly glancing between Boyfriend and his hands, trying to figure out how he should offer comfort.

“Maybe if you win the next round, dear ol’ Updike could give you a hug,” Whitty winked at Boyfriend, and when Updike blinked but nodded in agreement, Boyfriend got the most intense gleam in his eyes they had ever seen.

“Another! Round!”

Whitty and Updike watched in sheer confusion as Girlfriend conceded, setting up their next round.

Unlike Girlfriend who focused on the multiverse as a whole, Boyfriend focused on the different timelines. Annnd he somehow won? By checkmating Girlfriend from 8 timelines away?

As Whitty and Girlfriend both exasperatedly grumbled to themselves, Updike braced himself as Boyfriend slowly turned to him with glowing green glee.

Needless to say, Updike got thrown to the ground once again.

Updike sat up, hands hovering in the air for a moment before returning the hug with an amused sigh. “Whitty is right there . He is a lot warmer than me, I can assure you.”

“Mmm. I’ll get to him later,” Boyfriend mumbled, his cap dislodged from the impact.

Ruffling Boyfriend’s hair, Updike also adorably rocked Boyfriend back and forth before stopping when he realized, only for Boyfriend to cling to him tighter. Girlfriend and Whitty exchanged an amused glance while the former shut her computer game, eliciting furrowed eyebrows from Updike.

“I… am not complaining, Bf, but are you going to let me go anytime soon.”

“Nope,” came the muffled answer. “...I’m always gonna want hugs from you.”

“AW!” Girlfriend burst, flapping their hands as if fanning themselves on a hot day. “Babe, that’s so cute!”

Whitty rolled closer to the boys, teasing, “And Gabriel, you aren’t gonna complain about it~?”

Updike, entirely ignoring Whitty’s comment, pointed a finger at Girlfriend. “Okay, be nice. I doubt it would be a stretch to say Bf here has the worst experience with storms, so it is only natural.”

As Whitty grumbled to himself about Updike being an old man weatherman, Girlfriend held a teasing hand out. “Listen, the storm hasn’t happened yet, he just likes hugs from you .”

“Yea not even I get that privilege 24/7!” Whitty jokingly chimed in while raising his hands to the ceiling, rolling onto his stomach to stifle a laugh when noticing Boyfriend’s ears flushed red.

“...Wait, really? Why me then?” Updike bit his lower lip when Boyfriend paused. “Or, is there something else you have going on that’s making you so… uh, clingy?”

Boyfriend dropped his hug, cooing, “Aw you worried, Updad?”

The sound of a scratching record echoed through the living room as Boyfriend and Updike simultaneously froze.

Girlfriend and Whitty burst into wheezes as Boyfriend scrambled away and dove under the pillows while Updike remained stoic apart from the massive flush on his face.

“Your… brother is older than me, Bf. What do you mean DAD ,” Updike tried and failed to calmly say, internally screaming judging by his hands finally hiding his face.

After Boyfriend gave a strained beep from where he was hiding, Girlfriend winked with a hand under her face. “Cause it makes you flustered, Gabe~”

Updike made a quiet droning noise out of sheer embarrassment, drumming the closest pillow with his nails to get his energy out, not unlike Boyfriend would.

“Am I the mother then?” Whitty asked, stealing a pillow from on top of Boyfriend to try to uncover him, snickering when the lump that was Boyfriend hurried away.

“Whitmom.”

“You two, get out .”

Girlfriend and Whitty stuck their tongues out at Updike in unison before conceding, heading to the kitchen to get dinner and leaving him alone with Boyfriend. Updike stared at the pillow pile lump, hesitantly inching over and resting a hand on it.

The silence snarled Updike’s lungs like yellow rose vine thorns, cutting ever deeper, tangling ever tighter.

“You see me as a father figure?”

A set of eyes peeked out from under the covers as Updike realized he was literally patting Boyfriend’s head.

“Well, not literally . You’re too young for that.”

“...Not going to lie, I was not expecting to be told I am too young for once, but I suppose you are right.” Updike physically slacked his shoulders, sitting like a pretzel as he withdrew his hand, sweatdropping when Boyfriend instinctively gave a puppy dog whine. “Ok ok, you got it!”

Updike plapped his hand back onto Boyfriend’s head, both of them glancing away at the tangible awkwardness yet warmth.

“I can’t deny you just… have a paternal streak,” Boyfriend started, and Updike bit back a chuckle when noticing that Boyfriend’s gesturing was being outlined by the pillows. “You’re just… Oh man, I wasn’t ready for this.”

“That is quite alright. We could-”

Boyfriend blasted out from under the pillow covers, and when Updike withdrew his hand once more, he hugged Updike’s arm. “You’ve always been a pillar of protection and support.”

Updike cringed, immediately pulling his arm back. “ I would disagree-”

“And you’re always looking out for the world, which is basically what I represent.”

“You give me too much credit, genuinely-”

“Oh shush.” Silence. “So uh… welcome to the fam?” More silence. Boyfriend started rambling about how they didn’t have to put a label on it and it’s ok if Updike deemed friendship and familial relations differently and they could just vibe instead and-

Boyfriend’s flush could be heard through his tone alone, and Updike got the feeling that he wasn’t lying .

“ oh… ”

When Updike trailed off, Boyfriend gave a mortified high-pitched wheeze. “Ok I’m gonna leave you alone to think about that alone, wait I already said alone, just, never mind bye-”

“I would appreciate that, yes.” Updike pursed his lips in embarrassment, making it look like he was pouting. “A father figure, huh? It… is a welcome change of pace, do not get me wrong…”

“......I’M… just gonna go get some food!” Boyfriend comically spun around. “f*ck, Gf and Whits are so gonna tease me.”

“Want me to help sort out their mayhem?”

“You’re not helping to disprove my point.”

Updike rubbed the back of his head, and Boyfriend couldn’t help but melt at him adorably sandwiching his tongue between his teeth in sheepishness.

*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*

Raindrops blurred the world outside like a gray paintbrush, making long broad strokes to smudge the city heights. The quartet was munching on their respective meals, taking up residence in their pillow pit again, now complete with sleepwear.

Whitty, unsurprisingly, finished his dinner first, flipping through the tv channels while Girlfriend meticulously teleported each section of hers into her mouth. Boyfriend and Updike naturally sat together, both squinting in exasperation when Girlfriend scared Whitty by bonking him on the head with a samoa girl scout cookie, to which Whitty flopped backward, the cookie now falling directly on his face.

Even Girlfriend sweatdropped when Whitty, while lying there, intensely vacuumed the cookie into his mouth. Girlfriend shrugged, handing the box of cookies to Updike because they were his fav caramel flavor, while Boyfriend scooched his butt over and took a seat on Whitty’s stomach, jokingly asking, “You want another cookie, big boy?”

“Hm, maybe one more.” Whitty made grabby hands at Updike, who yeeted the box to Boyfriend and stifled a grin at Boyfriend then stuffing a cookie in Whitty’s mouth.

After making sure Boyfriend finished his food and set his plate down, Whitty sat back up, nestling Boyfriend in his lap. Boyfriend gave happy clicks, hugging Whitty’s legs for warmth while Whitty reached forward, smooshing his cheek with a thumb as if getting food off of his face.

Updike huffed in amusem*nt when side-eyeing Girlfriend as they geeked out over the scene.

“Say, if mint subdues my powers, what do you think would happen if I drink alcohol?” Whitty mused, absentmindedly tapping along Boyfriend’s back. “ OR , since my metabolism is too fast for coffee, what if I mix stuff like soda and coffee and energy drinks and alcohol?”

“Chug, chug, chug!” Boyfriend and Girlfriend instantly chanted, pumping their fists up and down, all while Updike dragged a hand down his face in the background, dislodging his glasses along the way.

“Oh please, that is dangerous , and you two should not be encouraging it,” Updike said, masking his inner turmoil by adjusting his glasses and gathering the empty dinner plates in a pile.

While Girlfriend and Whitty giggled to themselves about the human standards not actually applying to them, Boyfriend stood up in front of Updike. “Hold up, are you… comfortable , with us making jokes about drinking?”

There wasn’t a single indication on Updike’s face as he brushed past Boyfriend and ignored the sudden “oh sh*t” expressions on the siblings.

“Wait wait wait, I forgot, I’m so sorry,” Whitty said, accidentally kicking a couple of pillows when zooming in front of Updike. “I’ll stop-”

“Oh, no. Please go on ahead. I am not here to ruin your fun, so I am excusing myself.” Updike tilted his head at the pile of dishes. “ Some one has to clean up, correct?”

Boyfriend waved a hand, both he and Girlfriend now standing on either side of Whitty. “We’ll join! Well, if you want, that is.”

“What, why. I mean, okay, but why-” Updike cut himself off when Whitty grabbed all of the plates and hummed as he headed to the kitchen. “Wait hold up . You do not have alcohol in storage, do you???”

“Oh nah, we aren’t gonna do anything ‘dangerous,’” Boyfriend said, spinning around and stumbling for a bit when slipping on a pillow, only for Girlfriend to roll their eyes and levitate him into the air. “Lol yea, we just want you around!”

Updike didn’t respond.

After Girlfriend held Boyfriend like a teddy bear, Updike felt them following him as he joined Whitty at the sink. Updike and Whitty physically nudged each other back and forth trying to be the sole person washing the dishes, while Boyfriend and Girlfriend in the background happily dried the dishes with a dishcloth or literal flame.

“What should we do after this?” Girlfriend asked, kicking her legs while sitting on the kitchen counter, jokingly fanning her current plate so water splattered on Whitty’s hoodie.

Girlfriend proposed the game name that tune, but let’s be honest, she or Boyfriend would win. Whitty brought up musical chairs, being shot down by a lighthearted resounding no from Boyfriend because it would just end up in sibling chaos. Then Boyfriend mentioned telephone, grumbling when Girlfriend flatly mentioned how there were only four of them so it wouldn’t be that fun.

After the dishes were cleaned, the trio pulled out their phones to skim through possible game suggestions, all of them staring at Updike when he whipped out a whole ass computer to do the same.

“Such dad energy,” Whitty snickered, continuing to stare at Updike when he kept his eyes locked on his computer to ignore them. “Hey Gabriel, what do you wanna do?”

“I do not know.”

The group shrugged, focusing back on their phones as Boyfriend said, “Yea just let us know if you find anything-”

They all blinked when Updike then rambled, “Well, I saw this game, never have I ever? It appears to be a party drinking game, but could be played alcohol-free, where players bring up something they have not done and…” Updike squinted, fiddling with his glasses as he skimmed the rules, surprisingly missing the trio glancing at each other and shrugging with no complaints at the game brought up. “The goal is to… say something you have not done but you think others have done, to get them to drink? Wait, so drinking is supposed to be the punishment? Since whoever finishes their drink last wins???”

Girlfriend elbow jabbed Whitty, who reached over, gently whacking Updike on the back alongside a “Jeez chill , buddy.”

When the trio all stared back at Updike, nodding for him to continue, Updike’s mind went blank.

“Alright everyone, stop staring at him,” Boyfriend lightheartedly laughed, swatting in front of Girlfriend’s face in particular before scrolling through his phone. “I was thinking-”

“Oh thank you. My apologies. I do not think I particularly like eye contact, so I suppose it makes me freeze up in social interactions,” Updike analyzed, uncharacteristically actually sharing stuff about himself. “It is quite unfamiliar, which ties back to my uh… slight social anxiety, so perhaps I cannot handle being stared at when responding in casual situations due to the fact that I…” Updike shook his head, narrowing his eyes at the kitchen tilings. “Therefore, otherwise, I could be quite verbose-”

The trio wholeheartedly burst into laughter at Updike proving his own point.

Boyfriend beamed at Updike. “Man do I get that. It’s nice we’re still learning about each other’s little quirks like that.” Before Updike could pass out from the embarrassment, Boyfriend redirected, “Yea, never have I ever it is!”

“Keep your hair on ,” Updike blurted, hair hilariously poofing as he panic-read through the rules once again. “I still need to. Process . There is a scoring system-”

“As someone who would care most about winning, you don’t have to stress your fuzzy little head over that,” Girlfriend said, mime flicking at Updike’s hair. “We aren’t gonna enforce it as a competition.”

Whitty bobbed his bomb head, leaning against the edge of the sink. “Annnd by extension, the rules like, only sayin’ somethin’ you personally haven’t done, or how if no one drinks then the person who said the statement has to drink, or even if only one person drinks then they need to explain themselves, all those? Yea whatev, share what you’re comfortable with, we’re just here to have a good time.”

While Updike pondered over their words but gave a small nod, the trio joked they were going to get tea as the drink. Updike gave a weak smile as Boyfriend and Girlfriend joked about spilling the tea before finger gunning at each other while Whitty visibly fought the urge to bonk them on the head with a teapot.

The four of them chilled out in their pillow pit in a row in front of the TV, Girlfriend and Whitty having ordered bubble tea while Boyfriend and Updike stuck with their usual green tea. Boyfriend linked Updike’s computer with the TV screen as they picked out interesting questions from online.

Never have I ever… skinny dipped. Overdrafted bank accounts. Lucid dreamed. Whitty admitted he once accidentally got gum in his fuse. Boyfriend admitted he danced in elevators when he was alone. Girlfriend admitted she had never been on a yacht despite her family. They related over humming over lyrics of songs they didn’t know, sending texts accidentally to the wrong person, forgetting someone’s name immediately after introductions, and so on.

“Never have I ever used a dating app. Ok I have definitely done that,” Boyfriend chuckled, lying on his stomach and swinging his legs back and forth as he took a sip from his teacup. He glanced over at the rest of the quartet. Girlfriend drank, but neither Whitty nor Updike did. “Oh wow, I honestly wasn’t expecting any of those.”

Girlfriend munched on her custom bee-shaped tapioca pearls before answering, “My family prohibited it, unsurprisingly, but after we broke up, I did try it out in secret. You know, pull a few strings so it looks like I’m finding a new date in the real world instead.”

Whitty tilted his bubble tea, eyeing his frog-shaped pearls. “Now that I think about it, nope, never used one. I either didn’t have a phone, or it was also prohibited. I had my rockstar career, so I had to remain single to retain more fans, and I just never looked into it even now.”

“You thinking of dating anyone, my dear ol’ bro ?” Girlfriend asked, innocently slurping her bubble tea for the dramatics while Whitty stammered. “Aw come on, you totally could.”

“Yea but no pressure,” Boyfriend said, swirling his tea as if coating the teacup. “You mentioned WAY back then that you didn’t want to get a partner before getting your life together, what are your thoughts on it now?”

Propping his cheek up with his elbow lodged against the pillow pile, Whitty thoughtfully hummed. “It… might be an interestin’ experience. I’ll still have to think about it though.”

While Girlfriend joked Whitty had his eyes on someone already, Boyfriend glanced over at Updike, who stiffly turned away. “Gabs you don’t have to reveal anything you don’t want to.”

“...I simply do not see the point in dating apps. Or… dating, as a matter of fact?”

Boyfriend watched Updike tracing the edge of his teacup before breaking his gaze over to the TV screen. “Mmm. Too busy with work~?”

“No, I just… never mind. We are moving on.”

“No problemo!”

As they continued, Updike also relaxed more, asking questions about people’s stories and just plain drinking his tea in between questions. Boyfriend accidentally copied Updike, and when the two of them sipped in unison, the two siblings giggled to themselves.

“Speaking of which. I have never- wait, what is it again, never have I ever?” Updike mumbled to himself, rolling his eyes when Boyfriend gave him a friendly elbow-jab. “Never have I ever laughed until I cried.”

Girlfriend whistled. “Not gonna lie, that’s sad as sh*t,” Whitty bluntly agreed, reaching over and tinking his bubble tea container with Updike’s teacup.

After the trio all took sips, Boyfriend mumbled, “You could have even said never have I ever laughed .”

“What, I have laughed before!” Updike squawked, covering his face when the trio all raised an eyebrow at him. “I… think. It has been a while.”

“Uh-huh,” came the sorrowful unison of voices.

Updike exhaled, slipping out a familiar piano keychain from his hair and fiddling with the edges of the design. “Look, it is true that I did not have the most… pleasant of experiences, growing up. However…” He gulped, and while lying on his back, cupped the keychain to his chest. “Back when I still lived with my biological family, I… Well, we would not be considered rich, so we did not really celebrate holidays, but… one Christmas, my mum gifted me this. Call it, a lucky charm, if you will.”

“...”

“I… do not know where to go from there, and I suppose that was not quite related to the conversation at hand, my apologies-”

“No!” Boyfriend blurted, eyes absolutely soft. “That was lovely.”

“Could you imagine apologizing every time we go off topic?” Girlfriend chuckled while nudging Boyfriend. “Gabe, we’re the last people to care about that.”

The two of them predictably went off topic and chatted about musical techniques to elicit the feeling of winter, only pausing when Whitty grumbled, “Well even if you have laughed before, none of us have heard it.”

“...I suppose I would not be opposed if it does happen in the future.” Updike sweatdropped when Girlfriend’s eyes gleamed in amusem*nt, but he brushed it off. “Should we finish the game?”

As the outside downpour increased, flickering candles illuminated the living room just out of reach for safety reasons, a sea of warm fairy lights that slowly dimmed. The quartet brought out the nail arts and face masks for a true cliche sleepover party. While Boyfriend and Whitty helped each other with face mask sheets, the former wheezing at it being stretched over the latter’s face, Girlfriend tilted a bottle of green nail polish towards Updike.

Despite his hesitation, Updike tugged off his gloves, curiously observing the way Girlfriend took his hand and perfectly applied the nail polish. Well, they did it one at a time altering between Updike’s hands, but Updike didn’t exactly care as long as it got the job done.

Afterward, Updike held them up to candlelight, eyes shimmering like his nail polish as he tilted his hand back and forth. “Whoa…”

“They look delightful on you,” Boyfriend cheered while Whitty jokingly slung an arm over Updike’s shoulder in affection.

“Gf, you could be a make-up artist,” Updike complimented, soft when Boyfriend cheered louder at her compliment.

Girlfriend flaunted her nails, bedazzling them on the spot. “Artistry runs in my blood .” She winked at Boyfriend. “Maybe I’ll become a chemistry engineer outside of my physical work.”

“ Maybe , you should bother Miku with that instead,” Boyfriend lightheartedly retorted, grumbling when his face mask slipped for a moment. “Hey Whits, what do you wanna do in the future?”

“Hmmm. I like books, and I like food. It might be fun to have a library and cafe combo.” Whitty chuckled to himself at Boyfriend and Girlfriend’s starry eyes. “Who knows, I might become a writer and open a flower shop for fun instead.”

Boyfriend snorted. “Did you just admit flowers are a food type for you?”

“Oh shut up .”

While pasting a face mask on Girlfriend’s face through giggles, Boyfriend continued, “I’m comfortable with my current job as a musician, but I could branch out to being a voice actor or translator or something? Although… Whits, maybe we could be that flower shop and tattoo parlor dynamic!”

“Oh I never thought about getting a tattoo before,” Girlfriend mused, summoning a mirror to adjust her face mask before winking at Boyfriend. “And you know me, if you ever need skin practice, hit me up~”

Whitty tilted his head, grumbling, “And you know me , I’m not a big fan of needles, but…” Blink. “Wait how would tattoos even work on me. My skin is so tough, and do tattoos even show up on my skin???”

“Good… question,” Boyfriend said, he and Girlfriend both pressing a fist against their mouth in thought. “I’ve heard of white ink tattoos, but they might fade more easily. Also not sure about that first thing though…” He batted his hand and patted Whitty’s shoulder. “Eh we’ll figure it out if you do want one! Hey what about you, Gabs?”

Updike, as distant as he ever was, shrugged. “I suppose I had never considered either.”

Silence.

“Alrighty… What are your dreams for the future?”

“ If he has dreams for the future,” Whitty muttered under his breath, eliciting sweatdrops from Boyfriend and Girlfriend.

True to Whitty’s statement, Updike wilted in place. “Um… I… My life is dedicated to TGG.”

Something something, eternity loyalty, something something, not seeing a future outside of just being murdered, Updike just wasn’t going to explain.

Whitty gave an empathetic sigh. “Well… I can see you runnin’ a historical tea shop.”

“Or maybe you focus even more on being a mechanic!” Girlfriend chimed in, literally spinning like a gear in the air to emphasize their point.

“Or even something related to taking care of animals!” Boyfriend added, sporting wide eyes as he gestured around the room. “We could safe-proof the place and have it as an animal sanctuary!”

As Boyfriend dragged Girlfriend into his imagination of setting up a whole animal care center, Whitty peeled off his face mask and got out more of a face mask paste for some actual results. Updike instinctively scooched over to help Whitty with the paste, drifting closer until he was basically sitting in Whitty’s lap.

After Updike was done, Whitty took back the paste with an “I’ll do you!”

Updike blinked, awkwardly taking off his glasses and patting his cheeks. “Ah… Well, you need to push it all the way in, past my hair.”

Amidst the howling winds outside, Boyfriend and Girlfriend burst into small stifled giggles. Whitty rolled his eyes, lightly locking Updike in place with his legs as he stuck his tongue out in concentration to do just that. On the other hand, Updike narrowed his eyes at the couple.

Girlfriend daintily pressed a finger against her cheek, barely getting out between louder laughs, “Yeah, really gotta get it in deep -”

“ Babe .”

Literally everyone there but Girlfriend was now blushing in sheer mortification. Updike fought the urge to smoosh his face against Whitty’s chest, clearing his throat and saying, “Okay, no. Ugh. Oh lord that was filthy . Let’s just… roll that back.”

“You don’t gotta rub it in Gigs, no pun intended,” Whitty droned, pausing for a moment in his attempts to moisturize Updike’s face while Boyfriend facepalmed in response.

“You knew .” Whitty raised an imaginary eyebrow when Updike continued with a confused whisper, “You are asexual. Why do you still have a dirty mind?”

“Because sex is a joke to me.” Whitty slowly reached out and booped Updike’s nose with a small chuckle. “Also, why not? Ya aren’t ace, but you don’t~” When Updike stayed silent staring off at a single pillow, Whitty shrugged. “I still get uncomfortable with sex jokes bein’ too explicit though, so I expect some people, cough cough, to knock it off , thank you.”

Boyfriend jokingly leaned next to Girlfriend and mimed zipping her mouth.

Suddenly, a flash of lightning illuminated the room through the curtains, followed by the windows rattling from thunder. Updike got thrown off Whitty’s lap, expertly flipping and landing on his feet to take an overview of the situation.

Whitty was… startled, shaking in place and anxiously tracing along the stretch marks on his arms over his hoodie. Girlfriend was… trying to hide the fact that she was startled, her gaze darting all over the room as if reassuring herself of something. Boyfriend was just plain gone from sight. Well, not quite, as Updike stared at the shivering lump under the pillows.

“Am… I the only one here without storm trauma on some level?”

Boyfriend poked his head out of the pillows, grimacing as he held his shoulder and picked at his tattered face mask. Girlfriend stayed silent, positioning herself next to Boyfriend and also peeling off her face mask. Whitty simply snarked while tossing a pillow at Updike’s face, “Looks like it, weather boy.”

Updike dodged the pillow by tilting his body, taking a deep breath as the storm continued raging outside. “...Alright kiddos-”

“ HEY .”

“I will… help? To distract? You guys?” Updike winced when the trio turned their confused gaze onto him. Aw bloody hell, how in the fresh hell would he help with this? He barely knew how to comfort them, let alone help distract them? But they deserved a break from their trauma???

In times like this, Updike defaulted to work mode.

“Greetings. No need to be alarmed, for the leader of The Greater Good task force is present,” Updike projected, way over the top articulate as he sprung to his feet, expertly ignoring the fact that he was doing this with glasses over a face mask. “Whatever is troubling you, and however may I resolve this cause for concern?” When met with only blank stares, Updike held his hands out. “To what do I owe the pleasure of your… brevity?”

Boyfriend was the first to break into a weak smile, although he self-deprecatingly answered, “Oh y’know, pain.”

“ Egads .” Updike shook a fist at the ceiling. “I shall do everything within my capacity to alleviate that distress. Might I suggest a comforting blanket?” After Boyfriend shrug-nodded, Updike exaggeratedly tiptoed around them, whisking up a blanket from the couch before burrito-ing Boyfriend. Holding Boyfriend up simba style, Updike exclaimed, “Mission success!”

While Boyfriend gave a giggle and the two siblings jokingly clapped in response, Updike set Boyfriend down, stepping back and tossing his hair. “Ah, I suppose I should not get carried away lest I face HR complaints. As the leader of TGG, it is of the utmost importance I remain the face of objectivity. I have grown accustomed to serious affairs, so I am very productive in keeping people in line.” He pointed to the ceiling while strolling away as if having business to attend to. A leader must not afford to take a hiatus, and there is no greater satisfaction than witnessing one’s facility operating seamlessly!”

At Updike putting on more and more of a posh accent, Boyfriend joked, “Why are you British ?”

Updike adjusted his glasses like an asshole.

“My dear Bf, it is only appropriate. I do enjoy my share of tea, crumpets, and dignified decorum.” When the storm raged in the background, Updike threw himself into a stylized fighting pose, a playful glint in his eyes as he amped up the accent. “ Oiii , it is blowing a hooley out there! You reckon the breeze will bloody knock me right over?”

“Oh shut up you floofball,” Girlfriend chuckled, batting a hand.

Slinking back straight, white curls bouncing against candlelight, Updike lightheartedly snarked, “I implore, do not hesitate to share more of your creative comebacks. You truly get an F on conversational skills-”

“What, like you’re better?”

Updike gasped, a hand to his mouth and eyes dramatically wide. “Show some respect for the great leader of TGG .” He turned around, strutting as if modeling down a catwalk before meeting Girlfriend’s gaze with half-lidded eyes. “However… I suppose it is your prerogative to continue this… pitiful display of battle.”

Everyone watched as Updike deliberately planted his feet, and despite eyeing the pillow Girlfriend was hovering, conceded when she smacked him in the face with it. Spinning as if propelled by the pillow, Updike danced over to Whitty, interlocking his fingers to hug the thrown pillow and winking.

“My my, it seemed like that conversation was above my pay grade. What would you like to talk about, perhaps the weather-?” Updike genuinely faltered out of his persona for a moment, using the pillow like a sleeve to his face. “Or… perhaps something more substantial, Whitty?”

“You bein’ a pretentious bastard.”

Pressing a dainty hand to his chest, Updike absolutely monologued , “If you will allow me a momentary lapse of… keeping a stiff upper lip, I do indulge in frivolous fantasies of vulnerability. Companionship, through this book of life we are prancing through. The contrast, the synergy! I am a stickler for propriety, but perhaps you would join me on this grand ballet show of rehabilitation?”

Whitty stared at Updike’s outstretched palm, lightheartedly repeating, “You pretentious bastard.”

Updike pressed the back of his hand against his forehead. “Unbelievable. Nonsense . Alas, perhaps the intricacies of kismet will forever separate us so.” He crossed his arms with a dramatic pout. “Man, and here I was, just trying to cheer you up.”

Girlfriend and Whitty exchanged an amused glance as predictably, Boyfriend burst into giggles and rushed up to tackle Updike in a hug. Updike had the faintest flash of concern on his face when Boyfriend didn’t even have the energy to topple him as he continued, “I… suppose I am now increasingly one for vulnerability. Let’s just keep this between the four of us though, alright?”

Both hands cradling Boyfriend to ensure his safety, Updike did a sweeping bow for his audience.

“You’re such a theater kid , Gabs,” Boyfriend chuckled, jokingly yelping when Whitty stepped over and scooped them both up. Before anyone could react, Girlfriend swooped by and princess-carried Whitty and by extension all of them.

After spinning everyone around once, Girlfriend unceremoniously dropped the group with a grin, immediately bantering with Whitty when everyone disentangled. Unsurprisingly, Updike stole glances over at Boyfriend, whose smile was still too smug to be considered genuine. Updike reached a comforting hand out towards Boyfriend’s cheek, freezing when Boyfriend stared at him, but before he could withdraw his hand, Boyfriend smooshed his cheek against it.

Updike gave the cheek a little thumb rub, donning a small smile when Boyfriend perked up. “So… you want to see a magic trick?” Updike asked, gesturing his other hand and comically pulling a box of cards from his hair to which Boyfriend eagerly bobbed his head.

It was the classic pick a random card from the deck, and it would be retrieved when put back into the deck. Updike did variations where he shut his eyes while shuffling before sliding out the correct card, all the way to holding the deck behind his back before selecting the correct card.

“Whoaaa, how are you doing tha-” Boyfriend started, cutting himself with a wince when lightning flashed outside. “Maybe there are details on the cards? No, you just proved you don’t need to look at the cards to do it, so maybe you have a spiritual connection to individual cards-.”

“You overestimate me,” Updike flatly answered, absentmindedly shuffling his deck.

Boyfriend pressed his face closer to Updike. “Sooo, maybe when you flip through, the cards sound differ- no that can’t be it, I detected nothing different between the cards, same with smells. You didn’t… taste the cards to differentiate either. Then maybe-!” Updike frowned when Boyfriend shivered at yet another lightning strike, sweatdropping when he then rambled as if making up for lost time, “Ithastobesomethingwithtouch-”

“Whoa slow down there. I am in no rush, sweetie.”

Girlfriend and Whitty instantly gasped, smugly looming over Boyfriend to once again join forces to tease him for eliciting that statement. Boyfriend exasperatedly tugged a stray pillow over his face and melted into a flustered puddle while Updike couldn’t help but give a warm grin at the sight.

When the two finally ceased their teasing and started teasing each other once again, Boyfriend glanced back up at Updike, who finally got his face mask removed, courtesy of Girlfriend. “Y’know, you really aren’t helping with the dad argument.” Updike pressed a hand over his mouth in amusem*nt. “You’re acting like such a mentor too. Would you pleaseee teach me the magic trick? It would be such a great distraction against the terrible storm outside, and you could make it up to me for the teases.”

“Fine, fineee.” Updike presented his deck of cards. “This is a s-” Pause. “Uh. A tapered deck. As that name suggests, the cards are manufactured to be tapered.” He gestured Boyfriend over and ran a finger along the edge of his cards. “These are perfectly in line, but a randomly selected card being rotated 180 degrees…” Updike slid a random card out and slid it back in after the rotation. “It is now tapered in the opposite direction, hence the easy detection of its broad end. And viola.”

Through a sleight of hand, Updike removed the selected card.

“Mmm. Guess a magician does reveal his secrets~?” Boyfriend joked, sticking his tongue out at Updike while yoinking the rest of the cards to check for himself.

“Oh absolutely lovely, ya cute hoor,” Updike jokingly hissed right back, glancing at the card he picked. Ah, ace of hearts. How… coincidental. Updike smirked, and casually and with deadly accuracy, threw the card into Whitty’s hood with the ace of hearts design facing outward.

“...Ok I was just gonna mention I already knew this trick because it’s a relatively common beginner’s magic trick, but THAT was impressive as all hell???”

Updike rolled his eyes and did a dainty bow.

Even he was startled and toppled when the thunder suddenly sounded like a firing shotgun .

Whitty hunkered down in silence and instinctively moved away from Updike, Girlfriend noped out of there for a few seconds, and Boyfriend clung to the closest person, which ended up being Updike, scattering his organized stack of playing cards all over the place.

“It is still lashing rain out there, huh?” Updike muttered, physically grounding Boyfriend by returning the hug, watching as Girlfriend immediately teleported back, just to make sure Boyfriend was still there . Oh, these poor kids. “Hey Whitty, do you… want to join us over here?”

It was only when the logical part of his brain took back control did Whitty nod, scampering over on all fours and hugging Updike’s head. Here in the cuddle pile, everyone gradually calmed back down through deep synchronized breathing, with Girlfriend even levitating all of Updike’s playing cards back together. Whitty rested his head on top of Updike’s, absentmindedly floofing the edge of his hair. “Gabriel, how does your hair defy gravity like this.”

“Why are you surprised, he’s a cloud,” Girlfriend dryly answered, watching in amusem*nt Whitty playing with Updike’s curls like a cat smacking glasses off the counter. “Are you a species of cloud person, Gabe?”

“He’s just human in this universe,” Boyfriend murmured, still trying to keep his breathing steady while Whitty jokingly swirled a finger through Updike’s hair, tiptoeing his hand down Updike’s head and neck-

Everyone paused when Updike took a sharp inhale.

Previous conversation dropped, Whitty withdrew his hands and held them up in surrender. “I am so sorry. Bad memories?”

Still cradling Boyfriend with one hand, Updike rubbed the nape of his neck, a flustered blush inching across his cheeks. “No- I mean… yes, but… no, it is alright. For you guys. If you want. That? Er well, I guess to continue when it comes to you, Whitty…?”

As Boyfriend and Girlfriend stayed still, Whitty slowly inched his pointer finger towards Updike and observed him trying and failing not to squirm. “You still seem uncomfortable though.”

“No, that is not-” Updike cut himself off, his blush growing wider as he uncharacteristically stammered, “I th-think I’m just… Uh. Hm…”

After a brief pause, Girlfriend glanced at her nails and completed, “He’s ticklish.”

Whitty gave a low evil laugh, genuinely bursting into laughter when due to the distraction, Updike didn’t anticipate Boyfriend to be the one to immediately poke him along the neck and elicited an embarrassingly loud squeak from him.

Updike, after fully dropping Boyfriend in the pillow pile, slapped his hands over his mouth. When everyone stared at him, he cleared his throat and gave a flat “What?”

“Oh Gabriel, you’re always so untouchable ~” Whitty cooed, a playful gleam in his eyes as he loomed over a gulping Updike. “But you can’t win in a tickle fight against me, let alone all of us~”

At this point, Boyfriend was practically vibrating in place, hugging Whitty’s head to also loom over Updike. “Yooo so we get the chance to hear you laugh???”

For once, Girlfriend stepped in front of them with her arms out. “ Boys . Give the dude a break.” Boyfriend and Whitty both raised their hands in surrender and backed off with a sheepish smile.

“Thank… you…?”

Girlfriend turned to Updike, their eyes glowing red for a moment before grumbling, “I was the one who brought it up, so it’s only natural.” They poked their cheek, squinting at Updike. “Do you… want a tickle session?” When Updike stayed silent out of conflict, Girlfriend batted a hand. “It’s alright if you say no. I sometimes deny it when Bf offers because of sensory issues, so I get it.”

“You don’t even need to justify it,” Whitty added, shifting a bit back again and resting his hands clear on his lap, furrowing imaginary eyebrows when Updike curled up hugging himself. “I could only imagine why you’re so… untouchable, to begin with.”

“Yeahhh, really, no judgment here!” Boyfriend chirped, hands waving in front of him before dropping them with a frown. “It would be awful if we force you into it, no matter how curious we are.”

It was times like this where, despite knowing how godly they were, Updike felt a sense of… bittersweetness, at how human they also were. Updike gave a deep inhale and exhale, listening to the pitter patter of rain outside and Girlfriend still trying to wrangle the two boys. “...Alright.”

“Wait what.”

“I… needtosetsomerules, but yes. You have my permission.”

Wide grins stretched across Boyfriend and Whitty’s faces, and Girlfriend gave a chuckle, winking at Updike with an “Oh Gabe, you sure about that? According to my previous check up scans of you, you’re ticklish everywhere ~”

Updike groaned to himself, knocking askew his glasses to try and fail to cover his increasing blush. “Wait wait wait, do not make this weird. Please . I cannot emphasise enough the fact that this is platonic .” He held out a hand and started listing his rules, “Keep it to the upper body, so nothing below the hip, and I mean nothing . Hands only, or at the very least no outside tools. Also my clothing is staying on , no matter what .” He narrowed his eyes, pointing at the group. “ Maybe I will allow you to stick your hands under, but you need to ASK .”

The group shrugged, all agreeing with a small nod.

“In fact,” Updike continued while standing up, “My current shirt is too thin. I am considering… donning a bulkier one.”

Boyfriend raised an eyebrow at the formality, softly offering, “Oh, we got you a new hoodie if you want?”

As if on cue, Girlfriend teleported in a blue hoodie, to which Whitty held it out to Updike. Updike took the hoodie, intensely staring at the color but tracing a hand against the plush fabric. He slipped it over his shirt, pleasantly humming when realizing it dampened outside sensations, faltering when the OG trio all cooed at how cozy he looked.

Biting back a grumble, Updike half crossed his arms, pointing between Boyfriend and Girlfriend and commanding, “We are here to have fun , so, be sensible. Be nice . Be… you know…”

While Boyfriend and Girlfriend nodded in a “well duh” manner, Whitty poked his head into the conversation with a cheeky “I get the privilege of not bein’ nice~?”

“You need to zip your bloody mouth.” Updike gave a loud trembling exhale. “So. Um. Right. That is all I can think of at the moment.”

“You’ve actually thought about these things beforehand?” Whitty joked, blinking when Updike gave a violent flinch and stared into thin air in confusion. “I’m… sorry? Are you alright?”

Updike turned to Whitty with wide eyes for a moment before stoning his expression, intensely ignoring Girlfriend’s empathetic glance. “Oh, no, it is not on you.” Updike brushed it aside, glancing over the three of them. “Is all of that alright with you? You can say no.”

The group exchanged a glance, with Boyfriend answering, “Yeah I think those are actually quite reasonable.” Boyfriend felt Updike’s emotions swirling like a tornado, watching him pace back and forth while tugging his hoodie sleeves up.

“Ohhh this is real, isn’t it. Oh lord this cannot be fun for you guys, dealing with all these rules and not just having your way.” His confident mask slipping, Updike tugged at a strand of his hair. “What was I thinking , putting out all those rules. I did not expect you to just agree with all of them.”

“What does that mean.”

When Updike stayed silent in utter confusion as well, Whitty sighed, “All of this is just sad .”

“My apologies.”

“Oh c’mon Gabriel.” Whitty threw a hand to the side to emphasize his point. “I would be more surprised if you didn’t have these rules. You’re such a private person regardin’ touch, and judgin’ by your job, it is very understandable.”

Girlfriend, although getting slightly bored alongside Boyfriend so they distracted themselves with a multiplayer phone game so as to not rush Updike, agreed, “Yea thanks for telling us. I’m glad we actually know to avoid those things to help ensure you have a good time too.” Updike shuffled his hands down his arms, freezing when Girlfriend continued, “You wanna talk about safewords next?”

Despite Updike’s hesitation, he finally sat back down. Verbal safewords included literally “safeword”, “pineapple”, and an emphasis on the classic traffic light system. Nonverbal safewords included finger snapping, tapping three times, and an emphasis on squishing his hand twice to check in, and anything other than getting two squishes back is a sign to stop. They also established that outside of serious signs, things like saying “no stop” and hand swats will be taken in a positive manner.

“Is there anything we should avoid saying , or?” Boyfriend asked, on his stomach and swinging his legs back and forth. “Outside of strict boundaries, is there anything you particularly like or dislike, physically as well?”

“I… do not know.”

Girlfriend rolled her wrist to get Updike’s attention. “Well, do you have a preference for beginning and ending scenes?”

“...I do not… know.”

“And what about afterward?” Whitty asked, watching Updike fiddling with the hem of his new hoodie before absentmindedly flipping through his TV channels. “Anythin’ you wanna eat? Drink? Uh… cuddles? Compliments?”

The silence was heartbreaking.

Updike practically wheezed in embarrassment, and not in a positive manner. “I do not know . My apologies-”

“ No . None of that,” Girlfriend cut in with a finger wag in front of Updike’s face. “It’s ok. This’ll be an experience for all of us!”

“We’ll get through it together and do better next time, if you so choose,” Whitty added, setting down his remote and turning to a once again silent Updike.

Boyfriend and Girlfriend also set down their phones, the former donning glowing green eyes. “This won’t be perfect. We might accidentally overstep each other’s boundaries. That being said… because you’re taking a bigger risk in trusting us, this is a reminder you can withdraw this at any time. Even now if you want.”

Updike took off his glasses, feeling even more vulnerable as he set them on the nearest coffee table before sitting back down, jokingly resigned to his fate. “Let’s do it.” Bracing himself, Updike sweatdropped when Whitty pounced onto his legs. “What are you doing .”

“You comfortable with this?”

“I… I mean, yes, but why .”

Whitty sprawled even more over Updike’s legs. “Hey, this way none of us can tickle down here. You good with it?”

After a pause, Updike grumbled with a small flush, “Green.”

Boyfriend and Girlfriend giggled to themselves, inching ever closer while Whitty gave a mischievous wink, cooing, “You also can’t escape~” When Updike’s blush grew, Whitty cackled with a hand over his mouth. “Oh my god you’re already blushin’ so much, you’re so not gonna last~”

Updike stared into three sets of pearly fangs, the living embodiment of the “haha I’m in danger” meme as Girlfriend sat on top of Whitty with a dainty nail poking at Updike’s sternum while Boyfriend snuck around and set a hand on his back.

“You ready~?” Boyfriend and Girlfriend asked in unison, not taking any further actions as Updike stiffened with almost white eyes, trying desperately to focus on his breathing.

After a deep breath and exhale, Updike rested his hands flat on either side of him, giving a shrug nod.

Girlfriend pounced. They gently clawed their fingers down Updike’s hoodie, their artificial nails scraping light touches along. Boyfriend followed suit. He walked his fingers down Updike’s hood and back, making little fingerboard tricks and piano tapping along.

When Updike got used to the sensation of being touched like this, Boyfriend and Girlfriend exchanged gleaming glances, the latter asking, “How about we add some rib counting~?”

“Why do you expect me to know what these things mean,” Updike flatly answered, simply bracing himself when Boyfriend and Girlfriend eerily moved in sync, poking where his lowermost ribs are.

He deadpanned when Whitty gave a mocking wave in the background.

“1!” Boyfriend chirped, brushing his hand across the rib.

“2!” Girlfriend added, skittering her fingers across the… wait.

“Hold up, you guys are double counting ?” Updike commented before pointing at Girlfriend. “And the lower two are floating ribs, how are you counting those???”

Girlfriend waggled her fingers like a gremlin. “God of space, remember?” She winked, tracing over where some of Updike’s scars reside to try to comfort him before dropping her hands when Boyfriend shot her a look to do so. “And aw c’mon, it’s for fun~ People normally have 12 ribs on each side of the body, so 24 ribs, and if we ~double count~, that’s 48! Don’t tell me you can’t handle a little math ~”

Updike grumbled to himself, shooting up straighter when Boyfriend curiously trailed a finger along his collarbone and sent literal chills through him.

Boyfriend frowned at the unevenness of the collarbone, indicating Updike’s past injuries. “Small check in, Gabs. Are you alright?”

“...Green,” Updike huffed out, resigned as Boyfriend and Girlfriend snickered to themselves and continued their shenanigans.

They each counted to 12, adding up to a whopping 24. Boyfriend shifted his hand up between Updike’s neck and collarbone, cooing, “13-! Wait, 13 ???” Updike froze when Boyfriend shifted to his other side, quickly trailing a finger up his back. “No you’ve got the normal 12 over here. You’ve just got an extra-ass rib ?”

Whitty whistled.

Updike opened his mouth to explain, words suddenly scrambled when Girlfriend squished one of his ribs and answered for him, “Surprise! He’s got a cervical rib. From my scans, it doesn’t pose any current health issues. He’s just more likely to get mild neck pain because of it.”

“I’m what .”

Boyfriend snorted, resting his forehead on Updike’s shoulder. “You truly are something else , Gabs.”

Before Updike could process, Girlfriend sing-songed, “So in fact, 13 on this side, 12 on that side, that’s a solid 25, giving us an even total of 50!”

“You are still double counting-” Updike cut himself off with a sharp inhale when Girlfriend gently and smugly ground their knuckles in between his ribs. “oh lord help me.”

The more the feathery light touches went on, the itchier Updike felt. Updike clenched the pillows closest to him as he focused on literally not punching them out of reflex. He was going to lose his bloody mind, and Whitty’s stupid ass smirk was not helping.

“Aw you’re squirming~ ” Boyfriend cooed, squishing a cheek in adoration.

Contrastingly, Girlfriend jokingly tsked while giving a slow agonizing nail rake down Updike’s ribs, “Between that and your hoodie layer, I just lost count.” Boyfriend and Girlfriend exchanged an amused glance before smirking. “Guess we gotta start from the beginning again!”

“Wait!” Updike blurted, instantly flushing in self consciousness when everyone, especially Girlfriend, paused. “Or I mean, yellow? I…”

“Oh that’s good, you’re comfortable using that one!” Boyfriend genuinely cheered before settling down and nodding for Updike to continue with a serious expression.

Updike gulped, rubbing a hand over his ribs to ease some of the itchiness. “My apologies. It is just… You do not have to be so torturously gentle.” He now bowed and rubbed his face. “But… My apologies. I appreciate you being gentle with me, I really do. Maybe we should stop if this is not fun for you-”

“Pft oh I am having fun trying to get a reaction out of you,” Girlfriend bluntly said, booping Updike’s nose and snickering when Updike proved their point by pursing his lips in embarrassment. While Boyfriend disengaged and grabbed some water and snacks for all of them, Girlfriend reassured, “But don’t worry about that either. Seriously, you don’t have to force yourself to dramatize your emotions for our sake, especially since you’re so nervous.”

“I am not nervous,” Updike grumbled, fidgeting with his hoodie strings when Boyfriend draped himself against his back. When everyone gave a teasing doubtful noise, Updike hissed, “Oh yeah? One day I am definitely going to return the favour.”

Boyfriend munched on a granola bar, casually answering, “Ya can’t tickle me.”

“And you wish you could tickle me,” Girlfriend added with a chuckle, side-eyeing Whitty, who stayed absolutely silent . “Well anyway! I think I can say for all of us that we’ll be happy as long as you’re having fun, so should we move onto something else?”

Updike, although hesitant over what she said, gave a sigh of affirmation. “Quite.” He sweatdropped, scratching a cheek. “I am not… as fragile as you are currently treating me, so…”

“Whoop. Yea your weaponry skill alone is enough to prove otherwise,” Boyfriend laughed, giving Girlfriend a wink as if giving her permission to be feral. “I’ve got my own limits, so I’ll leave that to Gf instead.”

Blinking, Updike glanced back at Boyfriend before reaching up and ruffling his hair. “Yes, that is understandable. Your pain is undoubtedly exacerbated by the weather, and I have no qualms about you taking care of yourself.” After Girlfriend and Whitty snickered at the way Boyfriend melted against Updike, Updike turned to the former, loosening up enough to say with a playful tone, “And you! What do you have in store for me now?”

“Oh Gabe, you asked for this~”

Girlfriend amped up the intensity, diving forward and spidering her fingers all over Updike’s ribs, sparing them no poking mercy. Boyfriend just chilled out, sweetly tracing a cat doodle on Updike’s back, still ever so teasingly light. Girlfriend was the embodiment of the >:3 face as she moved onto kneading Updike’s sides, deviously prodding all over Updike’s waist. Boyfriend was the embodiment of the :) face as he squished his cheek against Updike’s shoulder, sending mini icy electric jolts down Updike’s spine.

Slotting their fingers between his ribs, Girlfriend jokingly jiggled Updike back and forth, quite literally shaking loose his facade. Between Boyfriend now teasing Girlfriend for being silly and Girlfriend bantering back at him, Updike couldn’t help but smile at the two of them.

That smile was quickly replaced with half joking dread when Girlfriend deviously grinned and wagged her fingers at him. “Oh GABE~ I simply just wonder what would happen if I…?”

Updike wiggled in place, tilting his head when Boyfriend reached forward and poked his cheek, noting, “Ok hold up. You’re holding your breath. Here-” Boyfriend zapped Updike just a smidge to snap him out of it- “Can you take a deep breath for me?” When Girlfriend respectfully paused, Updike did so. “That’s it. Good. What’s the safeword? Just for practice.”

“...Well, red. Or… pineapple,” Updike muttered, intensely staring off to the side with an embarrassed blush when Boyfriend made a proud noise. Despite Boyfriend claiming he was the dad figure, he couldn’t help but feel… young.

“Good job.” Boyfriend gave a cheeky grin. “Awww how cute. Your blushing is adorable, you know that?” He chuckled when Updike gave a loud hum in return, trying to distract himself by acting cool. “Alright alright, you’re doing great.”

As Boyfriend backed off, Updike gave a small gasp at Girlfriend sticking a hand in his hoodie pocket. She also grabbed Updike’s hand, squishing it twice to ask for permission. Updike squinted his eyes at Girlfriend before squishing back twice to give her the go ahead.

Now both her hands are in his hoodie pockets ok this is fine, this is a-ok, this is-

Updike shut his eyes and mouth in order to not make any noise when, despite Girlfriend visibly still holding back, mercilessly scritched at his tummy.

“I’m just getting started Gabe~” Girlfriend cooed, cackling when Updike tried to wriggle away, squeaking when realizing Whitty was still smugly keeping his legs locked in place. “Aw what’s the matter~ ? Can’t get away~?”

“U-u-um…!”

“C’mon, can’t handle a little…” Girlfriend rested her head on Updike’s other shoulder, giving a sultry purr, “Tickling~?” Updike slapped his hand over his mouth when giving an unwitting meep. “Oh you’re making this too easy~”

After hiding his face with his hands, Updike ducked in place when Boyfriend genuinely aww-ed at him. “Why are ya hiding that precious little smile~? Don’t worry, you’re safe with us, so it won’t hurt to show it off!” Updike intensely side-eyed Boyfriend before dropping his hands, making a scramble of noises when Boyfriend reached up and patted his head, twirling his curls and scratching his scalp.

Was Whitty giving Boyfriend tips on how to give him head scritches??? Updike dazedly glanced over, jolting when Boyfriend’s electricity tingled against his back. His brain wanted to worry about just how much of a poofy mess his hair was going to look at the end of this, but he just couldn’t focus on it for long.

Boyfriend plapped a hand right between Updike’s shoulder blades, giving him comforting back rubs and warm smiles to contrast Girlfriend’s feralness. “It’s alright, Gabs. Relax~” He chuckled, deliberately winking at Updike. “Looks like you’re enjoying this. You’re so silly~ ”

“mmmMMM-”

“You doing alright? Is it too much?” Boyfriend asked, and when Updike stayed silent, had the audacity to use his hand to lean Updike’s head towards him. “Now, what’s the safeword?”

“rED-” Updike cut himself off with a loud voice crack when Girlfriend drilled into his ribs while scribbling along his stomach.

As genuinely sweet Boyfriend was, he was still in mischievous cahoots with Girlfriend as he poked Updike’s cheek. “Mhm~ Would you like to use it? You could also say yellow for anything, really, so do you want a break?”

“Z-z- zip it, hhhh .”

Boyfriend wheezed, the electric cold buzzing of his giggles sending Updike’s back arching. “Alright, just making sure!”

Updike sweatdropped, now arching in the opposite direction when Girlfriend cackled, encircling rings of fire around his belly button, tighter, and tighter. Oh f*ck , Whitty was still keeping him pinned.

“Ohoho, is this a weak spot~?”

“... no …?”

“Then why oh why are you wriggling~ ?” Girlfriend asked, giving a bratty bat of her eyelashes as Updike gave a muffled whine, flipping her off. “Uh oh~ Is someone in trouble~? Does someone have a giggle button~ ? A little… squishy jiggly belly~ ?”

“ nooo .”

Girlfriend got right up in Updike’s face with glowing red eyes, yanking Updike’s hip still and lightheartedly growling , “I am not going to stop until absolutely breaking you, Gabe. I am the god of space, you think I couldn’t wreck you like the little stick bug that you are?”

“ ACK -!”

Whether Girlfriend continued her threats, or Boyfriend continued his compliments, or even if Whitty cheered Girlfriend on, Updike didn’t process it. Updike’s mind was already reeling from the contrasting warm and cool sensations, neither staying long enough for him to desensitize, and now there’s a swirling nail, even if layered by his clothing, inside of his belly button???

By the time Updike’s mind rebooted, he was heavily breathing and half-slumped against Boyfriend, who was jokingly trying to fan him. “Hey dude, you back with us?”

“W-wot?”

“Yea we’re taking a break.” Boyfriend’s eyes glowed green for a split moment. “I was keeping an… eye lmao, on your emotional state, and everything seemed alright… but you zoned out for a bit there so we didn’t want to continue.”

“Oh.” Updike cleared his throat, brushing off his hoodie and sitting up, noticing how both Girlfriend and Whitty stepped away and munched on some cookies in the meantime. “Um, thank you.” Pause. “Did I… laugh?”

Boyfriend sat next to Updike, patting his shoulder. “Nah.”

“...My apologies-”

“Oh enough of that,” Boyfriend chuckled, handing Updike a fresh water bottle. “Either you’re a tough nut to crack, or you won’t crack at all for whatever reason, that’s completely alright.”

Updike gave a small thanks, sipping his water and nearly choking when Girlfriend teleported in front of him, realizing he zoned back into reality. “Hey Gabe! How was that? Was it too much?”

After a few moments of silence, the trio all snickered in unison at Updike’s head empty no thoughts expression.

Whitty batted a hand at Girlfriend as if trying to tame a feral street cat. “Ok ok, back off Gigs. Maybe after this is all over he could do some more reflection.”

“‘After this is’- wait, when is this over?” Updike murmured, running a hand through his hair and deadpanning at Boyfriend at the static shock he just got.

“The tickle session? Whenever you want,” Whitty answered, trying to act nonchalant for Updike’s sake by shrugging.

Boyfriend and Girlfriend glanced between the two of them with barely hidden curiosity. After sipping his water once again, Updike just couldn’t help but jokingly snark at Whitty, “What, you’re that eager to have your turn with me?”

Updike smirked when Whitty flushed orange and pointed at him. “ HEY . I was tryna keep your feelings in mind. Shut up!”

“Mmm you’ll have to do better than that~”

“Oh you …” Whitty trailed off, holding up a clawed hand with giddily bared fangs as a familiar sense of challenge filled tension sparked between them. “If you’ll let me, I will .”

Girlfriend placed a hand over her mouth in amusem*nt while Boyfriend flailed at them, blurting, “ See ? They have history. Gabs is literally more comfortable around Whits.”

This time both Updike and Whitty flushed.

“Ew,” Updike jokingly said, setting aside his water and standing up. “No I can’t stand him. Goodbye-”

As Updike shuffled away, Whitty gave a “ No you don’t ” before tackling him and scooping him up with a tsk. “You’re stayin’ here , you little brat.”

Updike got wedged in Whitty’s lap, unfazed as he raised an eyebrow at him. “You know what you used to say… I’m a slippery brat.”

Whitty intensely glared as Updike wriggled away, jokingly wrestling him to pin him by the arms before hauling him back into his lap. “Nuh-uh! That was your nickname for me every time you got lost in the alleyways.”

Boyfriend and Girlfriend shrugged at each other, sitting on either side of Whitty as Updike crossed his arms, resigned to lying in Whitty’s lap but still putting up a verbal fight, “What are you going to do about it, huh ?”

Updike froze when Whitty grazed against his hip. “Not so tough now, are ya~?” After Updike jokingly snarled at him, Whitty’s voice turned serious. “I promise I won’t go below this. Is this ok?”

“Oh, yes, thank you,” Updike mumbled, eyeing the way Whitty hovered a hand over his hips before smirking. “What, too scared to-?” His breath hitched when Whitty’s hand flusteringly engulfed his hip.

Whitty ran a finger along the edge of Updike’s hipbone, gently pinching and tapping and kneading all the way. “Too scared to what~?”

“Mmm… be a competent tickler.”

In the background, Boyfriend and Girlfriend ohhh -ed in unison while sharing popcorn.

Unimpressed, Whitty drilled his thumb right where Updike’s side meets his hip, feeling Updike intensely shiver in place. “For the great leader of TGG, you’re an absolute dummy.”

Updike grumbled before tilting his head, sassing, “What, was that supposed to do anything? I seemed to have missed it, my dear Whitty.”

“And dense as a brick. Maybe you need a redemonstration~?”

Whitty playfully strummed along Updike’s side like a guitar to make him squirm. Updike, despite his voice already faltering, poked Whitty’s cheek to egg him on. “Seriously, is this really the best you have? I- I am not even ticklish. Good luck getting a reaction out of me.”

Ah, the consequence of his actions. Updike gave a sharp inhale when Whitty casually brought out his other hand and scratched at his tummy as well.

“We’ll see about that~ Just you f*ckin’ wait.” Whitty curled over Updike, practically caging him in his lap. “Y’know what, tough guy? Let’s see how tough you are. See how long you’ll last. You asked for this, and it is only fair I deliver.” Updike squeaked when Whitty pried his chin up with a finger and wink. “I’m actually kinda impressed that you’re still talkin’ sh*t when you’re completely at my mercy. You are in no position to make threats, and you. KNOW . It.”

“...Oh please . I have encountered more… perilous threats,” Updike huffed, dramatically rolling his eyes. “You are all bark and no bite. Maybe you should just keep quiet to gain my mercy.”

What Updike didn’t anticipate… was Whitty pausing, biting his tongue and nearly drawing gasoline. Boyfriend and Girlfriend stood up, both giving a weak laugh when Whitty shot them an appreciative smile before tugging them back down.

“Ok c’mon, don’t joke about that,” Whitty whispered to Updike, glancing off as dread dawned on their faces like a solar eclipse. “I like my share of dark humor, but maybe not right now?”

“ sh*t . My sincerest apologies, Whitty, I-” Updike sat up, digging a hand through his hair with a heavy gulp. “I… am sorry.”

Whitty deadpanned while snarking, “I swear, why does it take more effort for you to say ‘I’m sorry’ than ‘my apologies’?”

Updike flinched.

Before anyone could call him out on it, Updike brushed it off. “Listen Whitty, I am apologetic. Our past together was… messy, to say the least, and I…” Updike’s shoulders slumped as he held a hand over his flushed face. “...appreciate, you, being yourself. Being open, taking up space, comfortable enough to snark at me.”

A few moments of silence later, Updike yelped when Whitty poked his stomach with a teasing “Oh my god, did you just admit you enjoy me snarkin’ at you?”

“What, no, never,” Updike grumbled, a small smile gracing his lips. “I said I appreciated it. Technicalities, Whitty.”

“ You need to shut up sometimes,” Whitty snarked as an informal forgiveness letter.

“ Make me~”

Boyfriend and Girlfriend giggled to themselves as if providing commentary. Despite the severe change in tone, Whitty seriously hesitated, hands loosely draped over Updike in a hug. “Are you… sure.”

Whitty’s imaginary eyebrows twitched when Updike smirked. “Oh so that was it? That was all you got?” Updike glanced at his new nails with a mock hum. “Guess I overestimated-”

Dumping Updike into the pillow pile, Whitty didn’t even bother pinning Updike’s legs as he went for the metaphoric kill.

Oh lord, the scribbles on his stomach and sides were unimaginable .

A final verbal and nonverbal check in from Girlfriend and Boyfriend respectively later, they also backed off and focused on their own activities, leaving Updike with the predator that was Whitty.

Updike squirmed back and forth, the tickles dulling out his mind with tinted bliss.

Whitty tickled Updike’s left side and his stomach. Due to the lack of restraints, Updike instinctively rolled over to his left, biting back a shriek when realizing he just shifted Whitty’s hands to his stomach and his right side. Back and forth. Back. And forth.

Whining, Updike sucked in his stomach to brace against the tickles, a blue blush exploding across his face when Whitty cooed, “Aw where is this goin’? Where is your stomach goin’? The soft little belly? The tum-tum~ ?”

“Escaping from you,” Updike still sassed, smile turning into a genuine grin when Whitty’s shoulders shook from laughter.

“But I thought you said you weren’t ticklish~?” Whitty evilly squeezed Updike’s hips, gripping them still when Updike gasped and tried to buck him off. “Besides, I’m bored. Let’s go on a hunt for new spots, shall we~?”

Updike watched Whitty stretching and rolling up his hoodie sleeves, giving a dazed “Huh?” before audibly gulping when Whitty walked his fingers up his stomach. Updike instinctively curled forward, his arms protectively guarding his stomach, giving a wordless sputter when Whitty smirked and shuffled his hands across his shoulders instead.

Oh. Oh . Oh f*ck this was a totally new sensation, and he was not prepared. Updike shimmied back and forth, shaking Whitty’s hands off his shoulders, body trembling when Whitty spidered his fingers along his triceps instead.

“Great heavens, Whitty, stoppp .”

After he gave Updike a moment to say his safeword if he actually meant it, Whitty purred, “No~”

Updike playfully shoved Whitty’s hand off and pinned his arms close before giving a scrambled mess of words when Whitty reached over and held his biceps instead.

“I find it neat how you’ve got so much muscle despite lookin’ like a beanpole,” Whitty teased, unabashedly giving Updike’s biceps a pinch for the sole purpose of watching Updike internally die inside from the comment on top of the tickles.

Whitty let Updike go afterward. Updike uncurled, flopping back onto his back with white dazed eyes, limbs flailing when now Whitty skittered his fingers across his chest. “ WHITTY .”

“What~?” Whitty tapped on Updike’s sternum before scooping him up with an arm. “Are ya comfortable~?” Updike intensely grumbled under his breath about Whitty being a smug bastard , only to be cut short halfway by a jerk. A jerk of his body, sure, but also the jerk that was Whitty .

Whitty tapped his fingers in sync with Updike’s heartbeat, and when his heartbeat raced because of it, the dude just sped up the tickling!

“ HHHH -” Updike hummed through pursed lips while shaking his head, nearly wriggling right out of Whitty’s grasp at the worst of it.

“Just where do you think you’re goin’ this time? Aw I just can’t figure it out~ After all, we’re not done yet!” Whitty asked in mock confusion, making Updike’s mouth twitch when he did concede, settling for absentminded swirls across his skin. “Gasp, don’t tell me this is your weakness? Bein’ tickled? The big scary leader of TGG?”

“...nope.”

“Oh my dear dear Updike~ So I’m the monster here? The big bad tickleee monster?”

“ Zip .”

While giving a few more scritches across Updike’s stomach, Whitty cooed, “What’s the matter, gabby kitty?” Updike intense hissed at Whitty. “Aw, are you ok~?” Voice lowering an octave, Whitty genuinely asked, “ Are you ok?”

“...Green.” Updike still sighed in relief when Whitty let up on the tickling, screeching at Whitty when he suddenly attacked one of his worst tickle spots for a few seconds, “You meanie .”

“Oh am I? I have no clue what you’re talkin’ about,” Whitty chuckled, pretending to shift his hand to tickle somewhere else before drilling back into a death spot, eliciting a loud shriek. “Besides, so what. What are you gonna do about it? Hm~?”

“meanie meanie MEANIE!”

“You’ve gotta have better insults than that.” Whitty jokingly rocked Updike back and forth before asking, “Hey I’m gonna set you back down. Could I roll you over-?”

Whitty stopped short when Updike immediately grabbed his wrist with wide eyes. “No. Absolutely not.” When Boyfriend and Girlfriend glanced over for a moment, Updike faltered. “I mean, everything is alright-!”

“Yea, it is alright,” Whitty reassured, plopping Updike down on his back instead of flipping him over before teasing, “Just didn’t realize you like this bomb face that much.”

Boyfriend and Girlfriend rolled their eyes before heading back to their multiplayer games.

Before Updike could say his thanks, he choked on his words when Whitty furiously scribbled in the crook of his collarbones.

“My my my, you’re so god damn ticklish,” Whitty growled before cackling when Updike intensely clutched the closest pillow. “Guess you like this as well~ You’re not even fightin’ back!”

“I-I’ll s-show you!” Updike hunched his shoulders, trying and failing to swat Whitty’s hands away. He writhed, tucking his knees in out of sheer franticness before jolting straight, instinctively kicking Whitty to literally no avail. “aaaaaa WHITTY.”

As Updike thwacked his own hand against his pillow to try to distract himself from the tickling sensation, Whitty hummed, “Mhm, that’s me! How may I help you~?”

“No no no stop . It’s so- Oh lord oh dear oh my-” A blush swelled across Updike’s cheeks as he scrunched his face and muttered swears in every language he knew. “Wait, don’t, stop-”

“Don’t stop~?”

“ Nonono you can’t - Agh-”

Whitty gave a mock hum, ghosting his fingers over Updike’s hair. “I can’t what? To who?” Updike wasn’t even coherent enough to tell him it was “to whom” instead. “Man, I can’t really understand you there. Such a shame. You’re usually so… eloquent~ It would be unfair if I expected anythin’ less, right~?”

“Stop stop stop this is too much, nooo ,” Updike whined, watching as Whitty’s wriggling fingers shifted to their next target. “Wait, not THERE! ”

Because they established otherwise, Whitty taunted, “You do know that’s not any of the safewords, right?” Updike playfully stuck his tongue out, gasping and shutting his eyes when Whitty attacked once more. “I’m startin’ to get the feelin’ you’re enjoyin’ this, Gabriel~ I’m not even holdin’ you down anywhere, yet you aren’t stoppin’ me~? How strange! How curious! How precious ~ You wanna… enlighten me as to why~?”

Updike smooshed the side of his cheek against a pillow while biting his lower lip, his silence only broken by panting.

“Ohhh so maybe we’ll get a laugh out of you yet?” Whitty continued, fondly reaching out and resting a hand on Updike’s neck to thumb rub his cheek, chuckling as his worries of Updike literally snapping in half from all the wriggling subsided. “Hey buddy, how about we take a break? Don’t think you bein’ so tense would be good if we keep it up.”

After Updike rubbed his cheek against Whitty’s hand with a small nod, Whitty withdrew his hand, accidentally grazing against Updike’s jaw and freezing when Updike whimpered, eyes glazing over.

Updike wasn’t… seeing the room.

He was choking on salt water. He tumbled against something on trembling legs. He screamed when a monster caught him, hauling him down by the ankles.

Blood. Sweat. Tears.

Pain.

The sound of his breathing was deafening.

Updike was slammed against the icy ground face down. He was pulled to his feet by his wrists painfully yanked overhead.

His body felt sore. It reeked of ethanol.

A hand gently patted his hair. When Updike tried to plead his case, that same hand recoiled, punching him straight across the jaw.

He couldn’t say anything. Why couldn’t he… Why couldn’t he-

Updike sank to his knees, his body a shaking mess while his sanity a fleeing coward.

There was the sound of tearing flesh.

All Updike could focus on was a stray shirt lying on the ground.

Its circular buttons scorched into his mind.

*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*⑅❀⑅*

It was over in just a few seconds, but even Boyfriend and Girlfriend rushed over, giving Updike space but also hovering around in concern. Updike took a few deep breaths, using the back of his hand to brush away his tears.

Before anyone could say anything, Updike flatly said, “Ha. You got me! Haha. Congrats.” When the trio had no clue how to respond, Updike groaned, rubbing at his temples. “My apologies. I believe I feel… nauseous.”

“I’m sorry,” Whitty blurted, glancing around the room. “Uhhh, can I get you anythin’? Water? Food- no wait you just said you feel nauseous, umm…”

Updike gave a soft sigh, jokingly incorporating his safeword, “Pineapple pizza?”

The tension melting like microwaved butter, Boyfriend lightheartedly answered, “I like pineapple, and I like pizza, but together? Nooo .”

“You need to grow some new taste buds,” Girlfriend joked, flicking at Boyfriend’s cheek before vehemently rambling about why pineapple pizza was great.

“Truth be told,” Updike started, scooching over to literally be on Boyfriend’s side. “I tolerate it at best.”

Despite his internal turmoil, Whitty dramatically gasped. “Oh how dare you. The sweetness of the pineapple is perfect for pizza.”

While the four of them bantered, Updike felt the blanket weight of feathers over his shoulders, giving his thanks when Girlfriend and Whitty offered him water and snacks respectively.

Even though the argument went absolutely nowhere , Updike couldn’t help but smile as Girlfriend jokingly pretended to dislike pineapple pizza just to get on Whitty’s nerves. “...My apologies-”

“No,” came the three voices in unison, with Whitty placing a hand on his chest and continuing, “ I’m sorry-”

“ No .”

Girlfriend teleported next to Boyfriend as Whitty and Updike stared at each other, the former blurting, “What do you mean no . I just- You just-”

“I said no,” Updike affirmed, setting aside his water bottle and shuffling his way in front of Whitty. “It was not your fault.” Updike took initiative, grabbing Whitty’s hand and giving it two squishes, grinning when Whitty returned it. “Do you want to go again?”

“ Excuse me?” When Updike shrugged, Whitty tugged his hand back. “Are you sure you don’t wanna, y’know, talk about it?”

Updike clenched his jaw, thoughtfully humming as he stroked it. “It is just… past memories. My trauma triggers are not the most rational, but I get the feeling you guys empathise. We both overstepped each other’s comfort zones a little, but that is quite understandable as we are still learning more about each other, eh? So I am proposing, let’s continue from where we left off, because I know you’ll be mindful, and I want to see just how vulnerable I’ll allow myself.”

“...Are you drunk on tickles.” Whitty rubbed at his eyelids when Updike innocently beamed . “I have literally never seen this side of you, what the hell.”

In the background, Girlfriend loudly sipped on their summoned soda while Boyfriend gave them a thumbs up. “He’s telling the truth, Whits!”

Whitty sweatdropped, turning back to Updike when he fanned himself and said, “Hold up, I’m going to take off my inner shirt.”

“Wait what.”

Updike retracted his arms into the hoodie, taking off his shirt from the inside and plopping it out from the bottom before returning his arms back into the hoodie sleeves. While folding it button side down, Updike gradually gulped, “...This… is still scary. I think you’re right, Whitty, I would not have admitted that otherwise.”

Exhaling, Whitty tilted his head at Updike. “Yeah… Are you absolutely sure you want to continue? I’ll trust in your decision, but I’m… worried.”

“Mhm.” Updike patted his hoodie pockets in a “come at me” motion. “I… think I feel even safer around you guys after how you handled what just happened.”

“...That is the cheesiest statement I’ve ever heard,” Whitty chuckled, jokingly cracking his knuckles. “Alright, one final showdown for the night. I’m not comfortable continuin’ even more than that.”

“Understood.”

Whitty plopped Updike back into his lap, randomly scribbling patterns on Updike’s stomach as a warm up. Updike simply settled into the warmth, the scribbles not yet intense enough to be ticklish.

Boyfriend and Girlfriend flipped on the tv and dimmed the lights. They dragged blankets into the pillow pit, silently giggling to themselves at how blissful Updike looked before sharing a blanket to chat about cozy games.

There was a moment of Girlfriend smirking and wriggling her fingers against Boyfriend’s side, to which Boyfriend flatly said with a raised eyebrow, “I have no clue what you thought would happen. I’m not ticklish.”

“Awww.” Girlfriend pouted, resting their head against Boyfriend’s shoulder and absentmindedly thumbing at Boyfriend’s palm. “I wish that your wings would at least still be…”

Updike’s mind was already too loopy from the tickling to process the words, but he gave a sad hum in response.

Boyfriend instantly latched onto Updike’s hum, continuing it with a song that Girlfriend soon mirrored. While Whitty scribbled his signature playstation eyes against Updike’s sides, Boyfriend and Girlfriend unintentionally provided background music. Updike sported a soft grin as he glanced back up at Whitty, teasing, “You sure are taking your time.”

“Mmm, wouldn’t want to overwhelm you,” Whitty admitted before joking, “After all, you’re a ticklish little teddy bear.”

“I am not little.”

“Then you admit you’re a ticklish teddy bear?”

While Girlfriend nudged Boyfriend and called him her teddy bear, Updike wordlessly squawked at Whitty before actually responding, “ You’re not proving your point!”

Whitty swirled around Updike’s belly button while playing with his chest fluff. “Am I? You sure about that?”

“I’m not scared of you!” Updike said, half in genuineness, half in mockery. “So bring it, coward!”

“Oh that is IT .” Whitty scribbled along Updike’s spine, adding in pokes along the ribs. “You need to pay for that.” Whitty did rhythm game jacks on Updike’s sides, smirking when Boyfriend and Girlfriend jokingly beatboxed to the beat. “You have one chance to take back what you said, or else .”

Updike stuck his tongue out at Whitty, already shrieking when Whitty drilled against his stomach in retaliation. Even though he was rolling around to try to protect himself, Updike got betrayed over and over by his countless tickle spots.

“You’re remindin’ me of a rotisserie chicken right now,” Whitty snarled as Updike rolled onto his back, easily prying him onto his back once more. “Om nom nom, Gabriel~”

Tumbling to the side, Updike jokingly tried to escape, yelping when his legs gave out and he collapsed back into absolutely helpless ticklishness. Whitty hugged Updike close, fondly resting his head against Updike’s shoulder as he cheekily ground his knuckles right where Updike’s underarms met his chest, feeling the way Updike flailed against him with a startled cry.

“Well that’s a new noise,” Girlfriend was the first to comment, but also was the last to hover over Updike in concern.

“Traffic update?” Boyfriend asked as Updike tried to catch his breath, face flushed from adrenaline.

After Whitty gently set him down, Updike actually flushed harder. “Um… green… but I… have a small request.” When the two boys nodded for him to go ahead, Updike covered his face with his hands. “...are you… comfortable… um. doing this…… undermyhoodie?”

The trio all blinked.

“Wait, are you serious . You were the one saying we should ask!” Boyfriend exclaimed, shuffling closer when Updike squeaked as if he didn’t expect how this would turn out this way either. “Alright… so, is that directed at Whits, or all of us?”

“I just want to test it,” Updike grumbled, voice getting shyer. “And I… guess, all of you…?”

Boyfriend and Whitty both glanced over at Girlfriend, who politely declined by teleporting a foot away, before exchanging a smirk. “ Gladly ,” Whitty chirped, rubbing his hands in joking glee as well as warming them up, cackling when Updike peeked between his fingers and even his ears started blushing. “You probably want to keep your hoodie on, but are we allowed to slide it up?”

“oh this is humiliating,” Updike muttered to himself before exhaling. “Yeah. Do not make this weird.”

Whitty gingerly latched onto the hem of the hoodie, scooching it forward and playfully scribbling along Updike’s sides while doing so until the hoodie was halfway rolled up.

Updike lay there, not daring to remove his hands from his face, even more so when Boyfriend point blank cooed , “ TUMMY .” Mortified, Updike curled up with a wheeze, his blush practically glowing through his hands when Whitty gently nudged him onto his back once again.

After a period of tranquility, Whitty reached out and set a hand on Updike’s hip, squishing his stomach and warmly rubbing the closest scar. When Updike didn’t object to it, Whitty innocently giggled, nestling down next to Updike and playing with his fur as if it was silly putty. Boyfriend happy-stimmed before joining in, swirling the fur on Updike’s other side, dampening his ice powers for Updike’s comfort.

“It’s funny. When we started, you basically had 3 layers of protection from our tickles, includin’ your fur,” Whitty mused, tapping his fingers around Updike’s belly button and eliciting a visceral shiver. “Ohhh didn’t see that one comin’, did ya~? That’s because you’re still hidin’ your face, you absolute fool~”

Boyfriend shuffled his hand down where Updike’s side met his stomach, giggling when Updike instinctively tried to curl away. “You have so many goosebumps, Gabs.”

“ I didn’t know that,” Whitty answered, holding up his hand to demonstrate before jokingly playing tic tac toe with himself on Updike’s stomach and watching it quiver from stifled emotion. “My hands are too rough for it sometimes.”

“...they’re very gentle.”

Updike froze when feeling Boyfriend and Whitty’s stares, deflating in embarrassment when Whitty gave a startled laugh and thanks.

“And you’re so sweet!” Boyfriend chirped, wading over to hug Updike’s head. “You’re also so fluffyyy ~ Heeheehee, so fuzzy!”

Disoriented, Updike dropped his hands to squint at Boyfriend. “I think you’re too drowsy for this.”

Boyfriend squawked for a moment. “I’m being genuine! It means a lot you’re being vulnerable with us, and I’m so, so proud of you.” He jokingly teared up, patting Updike on the head. “There there, I’ve got you.”

After deadpanning at an amused Whitty, Updike couldn’t help but smile, leaning a little more against Boyfriend.

A demonic gleam in his eyes, Whitty attacked with tickle pokes, eliciting a surprisingly high-pitched squeal from Updike. “Ok no, nope nope yellow,” Updike blurted, jolting away from Boyfriend and sliding his hoodie back down. “ Nope . No likey. No. That’s too much.”

“Sorry sorry!” Whitty chuckled and backed off alongside Boyfriend before teasing, “‘ No likey ’-?”

“ Zip .” Updike dragged a hand down his face, his blush such a dark blue it looked like his face was stained with blueberries. “...Maybe another time…?”

Boyfriend and Whitty saluted in unison, but the latter continued with his teasing, “‘ Another ’ time-?”

“ ZIP .”

An elbow-jab at Whitty’s side later, Boyfriend stepped back with Girlfriend materializing in front of him with the same demonic gleam in her eyes. “If you two are continuing, I’m doing the sh*ttalking!”

“ Try me ,” Updike immediately shot back, fists clenched in challenge. “You can’t be the leader of TGG without having thick skin!”

When Girlfriend and Updike metaphorically shot fiery daggers at each other, Whitty jokingly checked that his fuse wasn’t flaming before speaking up, “Actually, I do wanna try somethin’.” Girlfriend and Updike both glanced over at Whitty, the latter flushing when he continued, “I never tickled your underarms, so… can I~?”

“Ohhh you’re not ticklish , are you, Gabe~?” Girlfriend mocked with a gossiping hand over her mouth.

Updike deadpanned at her, deliberately being a brat by ignoring her but nodding towards Whitty. “If you must.”

Whitty reached out, chuckling when he encircled Updike’s wrist with a hand with room to spare. When Whitty slowly raised the arm up, Updike yanked his hand away from him, interlocking his hands behind his back with a small whimper.

“Are you alright???” Whitty asked, his hands hovering in the air as if to reassure Updike where they were. Updike stayed silent, and Girlfriend surprisingly followed suit. “I’m not gonna do anythin’, Gabriel. Could I… get a traffic update?”

Exhaling, Updike now shuffled a hand down his arm. “I… Um. Yellow?” When Whitty nodded for him to continue, Updike winced, rubbing the nape of his neck. “Oh. Uh… I am not against your proposed idea. I just…” Updike now held his hands over his mouth, clearly unsure of what to do with his hands as he whispered, “...please don’t restrain my hands.”

“Oh sh*t.”

Despite his past trauma, Updike couldn’t help but smile at that reaction. “Hey, I get it. We could still do this.”

Whitty rested his hands on his lap, giving a questioning hum. “Are you plannin’ to raise your arms yourself-”

“ Absolutely not ,” Updike cut in, his smile faltering. “...Sorry.”

When Whitty had no clue what to say, Girlfriend dramatically leaned against him before batting a hand at Updike with a snarky “Gabe, my babe basically can’t reach down due to his back, big f*cking deal if you’re the same but in the opposite direction.”

Updike gave a silent huff of amusem*nt before nodding and taking a deep breath. When Girlfriend teleported away from Whitty, Updike scooched forward, hesitantly sitting in Whitty’s lap and propping his arms over his shoulders.

Hands shooed from their position, Whitty instinctively placed them on Updike’s waist, flushing for a moment when realizing he did so before glancing to the side. “Are you sure you want to do this? Bee also isn’t a fan of eye contact for example.”

“Hm. I’ll allow it.” When Whitty glanced back at him, Updike winked and joked, “You could say I’m giving you the… green light.”

“... Booo ,” Whitty laughed, instinctively curling in, his hands shifting to Updike’s back for a hug.

“Now kiss~”

“ GIGS .”

Girlfriend gave a cheshire grin as Updike buried his blushy face against Whitty’s shoulder. “What? I didn’t say romantically~” Whitty rolled his eyes, giving Updike a back rub, sweatdropping when Girlfriend cracked her knuckles. “Ok I’m bored now. You ready to be wrecked , Gabe? Cause too bad, there’s nothing you can do about it! You just have to lie there. And f*cking TAKE it .”

“Well technically , we don’t have to go that far if you don’t wanna,” Whitty shot back as Updike squinted at Girlfriend in teasing exasperation.

Intensely elbow-jabbing Whitty’s side, Girlfriend joked, “What are we, good cop bad cop? Just focus on the tickling.”

“ Sheesh Gigs.”

“Yea Gf , get with the program,” Updike joined in with a smug grin, yelping when Whitty’s back rubs turned into tickles.

“ You should get with the program and admit you’re ticklish already~” Whitty purred, arching Updike against his chest.

“W-whose side are you on???”

“ Mine~ ”

While Girlfriend and Whitty both burst into giggles with Updike giving a genuine huff of amusem*nt, Boyfriend beamed from the background, only a single headphone ear cup on. It was always nice to see his ~besties~ getting along.

“But seriously though, you ready~?” Whitty asked, smirking as he shuffled his hands back onto Updike’s waist, teasingly scraping his hoodie.

“Oh don’t you dare ,” Updike lightheartedly answered, having an intense staredown with Whitty as he inched ever closer to his armpits. “Nnnope.”

Whitty withdrew his hands, chuckling when Girlfriend immediately roasted, “You’re perfect for each other. You’re both utter wimps .”

Updike pouted, sharply inhaling when Whitty smirked. “Oh no … Whitty, please wait, nonono- don’t you dare dON’T YOU DARE-”

The sound of Updike playfully screeching at Whitty echoed through the room.

Due to his hands interlocked behind Whitty’s head, Updike even accidentally pulled Whitty closer to him while he was wiggling. Updike then tried to catch his breath, narrowing his eyes when Whitty hovered a hand directly under the crook of his underarm, wriggling his fingers. “10. 9. 8-”

“Oh come on , Whitty.”

“7. 6. 5~”

Shifting back and forth from anticipation, Updike sighed, “Aw bloody hell, could you just get this over with-?”

Updike gasped and literally choked on his saliva when Whitty drilled against his underarm with his other hand. “You asked for it~!”

Immediately scrambling away and full on punching Whitty’s face, Updike hissed and shook his hand in pain after basically punching solid metal . “ Tsss - Whitty I am SO sorry.”

“Ouch,” Whitty flatly said before trying and failing to stifle a laugh. “Oh my god , Gabriel. How do you still have the strength for this???” While Girlfriend silently floated over to help Updike with his aching hand, Whitty touched where Updike punched him, teasing, “And how long have you wanted to do that?”

“I didn’t want -”

“And you still failed,” Girlfriend cut in, hands gentle when strapping a summoned ice pack to Updike’s hand, tone harsh as she roasted, “What kinda idiot are you, feisty enough to punch a literal doomsday weapon capable of withstanding bomb explosions, and expect that would do literally anything ?”

While Updike grumbled to himself, Whitty rested his head on his shoulder and said, “Y’know, no matter how soft you act around us, you’re ultimately a tough cookie. Even when it comes to tickles , you’re still hangin’ in there. It’s admirable, really, even if it’s currently infuriatin’ .”

“You absolute sap,” Girlfriend dryly retorted, to which Whitty shoved her shoulder and she nearly toppled Whitty when returning it.

Updike gave a weak smile before staring at his hands, a heavy sense of remorse drowning out the banter. “...Are you… certain you guys want to continue?”

“Well of course!” Girlfriend and Whitty exclaimed, the former continuing, “Do you think we would give up that easily? I said I wasn’t gonna stop until breaking you, remember?”

“Oh lord please no,” Updike lightheartedly answered, instinctively trembling at the duo of prowling predators in front of him.

While Whitty stayed dangerously silent, Girlfriend mocked, “What’s the matter~? The big bad TGG leader can’t handle a little tickle~ ? There’s no escape, Gabe.” Girlfriend licked their smirking lips, a cat playing with their prey as she stole back Updike’s ice pack. “Your fate is in our hands, and we are going to keep you here as long as we want, until you’re tickled senseless . You can scream. You can beg. It won’t help you. ”

“Yeah yeah,” Updike groaned, comfortable enough to flop into Whitty’s lap, clutching his hoodie so as to not punch him again. “Just, do what you want…”

Whitty held a hand in front of Girlfriend before patting Updike on the head. “Your hair is gray-”

“Wow thanks sherlock.”

“As I was sayin’ ,” Whitty snarked back before softening. “Lemme guess, self conscious over how you still haven’t allowed yourself to laugh?” Updike’s hair darkened in confirmation. “C’mon, even if we want to hear it, it’s alright if it doesn’t happen.”

Updike made a frustrated noise before running a hand through his hair. “But- We have been at this for so long . What are you even trying to accomplish at this point???”

“Nothin’, honestly, we’re just havin’ fun!” Whitty made direct eye contact with Updike, smirking at his dilated pupils and playfully growling, “After all, looks like someone’s enjoyin’ this too, hm~? Blushy blushy~?”

Despite his amusem*nt, Updike didn’t even give a pity smile. “That… is not enough.”

“...Alright, how about this: the goal is to make you admit you’re ticklish~”

Updike raised an eyebrow, resting his arms on Whitty’s shoulders once more. “Alright.You… can try~”

Whitty chuckled, slotting his arms under Updike’s and grazing against his underarms. Both of them froze when Updike clamped Whitty’s hands with his arms. When Whitty tried to tug his hands back, the motion made Updike’s breath hitch in panic.

“Uh oh~ Great move there~” Girlfriend snarked, shrugging at the imaginary camera when Whitty took advantage and tickled Updike while his hands were trapped, eliciting a loud shriek. “Woe is you, you poor poor thing~ Simply awful ~”

“F-f- f*ck y-you.”

Girlfriend placed her hands over her cheeks while Updike shuddered in place, answering in a fake pity voice, “Nawww, does that tickle~? That’s too bad~ I know I know, you’ve got it rough, I absolutely agree. You should write a formal complaint letter if you're not too… stuck~” Updike glared at Girlfriend before burying his face against Whitty’s hoodie to brace the tickles. “Wow~ Here we see Gabe in his natural habitat. Such elegance. Such grace~ ”

Updike didn’t even bother to respond. Instead, Whitty leaned in, whispering into Updike’s ear in a cutesy tone, “Does the little squirmy wormy like that? The little ticklish buggy wuggy~?”

“ NO ,” Updike hissed, silent tsks escaping through his pursed lips. “ f*ck off .”

“Alright alright. Before this goes on, I gotta say yellow.” Whitty tilted his head towards his hands, still pinched between Updike’s arms. “Could you… free me. I’m also not a fan of my hands bein’-”

Updike loosened his accidental death grip, and before he could apologize to no end, Boyfriend appeared next to them and booped his nose to silence him. Updike watched as Girlfriend and Whitty both teased Boyfriend for being a gremlin as well before chatting with each other about how else they could wreck him.

The three of them being physically together and having fun joking around was the first sprinkle of sunshine after a snowstorm. Updike beamed, a hand to his chest as he got the comfort that the world itself was safe.

“Well tickle my fancy!” Boyfriend joked, winking before patting his shoulder. “In that case, I would be a… feather-weight champ!”

Giggling filled the room.

They WHIPPED their gaze at Updike, who slapped a hand over his mouth and tried to pass it off as a cough.

“...I love you even more now.” Girlfriend and Whitty now whipped their amused gaze at Boyfriend, who scrambled to continue, “Platonically! I’ve just never, ever heard you laugh before, and it was lovely , truly, oh man???”

Updike graced Boyfriend with another giggle, hiding his grin when Boyfriend sported wide shimmering eyes. While Whitty jokingly waved a hand in front of Boyfriend’s love struck gaze, Girlfriend crossed her arms and groaned, “I cannot believe, that was what got you.” Her fangs gleamed between her snarls, “However… You finally broke, Gabe. Oh we are going to wring every drop of laughter from that cloud head of yours~”

Giving a small meep, Updike faltered when Whitty inched closer with warm glowing eyes and cooed, “Aw, where’s that smileee~? Your laugh is so cute, could I hear it again?” Whitty chuckled when Updike stuck his tongue out at him. “Oh how rude. C’mere you!”

Whitty tackled Updike with tickles, watching as his shoulder shook from silent laughter. Despite Updike’s best efforts to conceal it, he burst into building giggles, a waterfall of the trio’s earned reward cascading through the room.

Updike panted, scrunching his nose and covering his face, but his crinkled eyes and tongue poking out between his teeth gave away his mirth.

When Whitty gently dubbed his tickling method as “explody fingies” from also being drunk on tickling, Updike couldn’t help but tease, “Well that’s on brand for you~” Whitty blushed, jokingly snarling when Updike continued, “No need to get so… heated , I’m having a real blast~ So, you could say your joke didn’t… bomb -”

“ SHUT .”

Muffling some more giggles against Whitty’s hoodie, Updike feebly kicked his legs, and when that did nothing to stop the tickling, he curled up into a ball of flustered fluff as a failing defense mechanism.

Girlfriend floated next to a silent Boyfriend to give him a side hug, all of them blinking when Updike’s melodic peals of soft laughter threw the room into black and white.

Whitty paused in his tickling, donning dumbfounded eyes as he glanced around, only relaxing when Boyfriend said, “Yea this happened during our rap battle too. Man, that takes me back.” Whitty turned back to Updike, sporting an awed blush at the purest flustered face Updike had while in the background, Boyfriend joked about Updike being a piano.

After his giggles pittered out, Updike deliriously reached up and pinched Whitty’s cheek. “Aye, cheers mate~”

“Well that’s a new one, how cute.” Whitty gave a toothy grin, setting his hands back onto Updike’s sides and drawing out a tensed whine. “You up for some more?”

Updike, shyly squishing Whitty’s hand twice to confirm, breathed out a quiet “don’ttt.”

“Oooo, Imma getcha! Coochie coochie, tickle tickkkle~”

“Oh nonono Whitty you twat -” Updike threw himself onto his side, cloud hair rippling as Whitty dove back into the tickling, voice cut off by the most adorable airy little laugh.

Whitty gently dug his fingers against Updike’s ribs, asking, “What? Is everythin’ alright? What’s so funny and distractin’ , huh? I’m not doin’ anythin’! Is life just too much for my poor ticklish friendo?” Updike couldn’t answer him through all his tiny giggles. “Are you laughin’ at me? Rude! And you’re not even gonna apologize??? Be serious and answer me, you gigglebug!”

“Z- zip …”

“Well what if I don’t~ ? What are you gonna do, laugh? Blush? Adorably squirm against my hands? Oh no~” Whitty’s giggles mixed with Updike’s. “Aw not fair! I was gonna say you were the one bein’ loud, but your laugh is too contagious~”

Did Whitty just say it was not fair? Not fair to him???

Updike scowled at Whitty, flopping onto his back and pointing at Whitty, flailing when he realized he fully invited the following tummy tickles. “ Oiii -”

“Laugh if you admit you’re adorable~” Whitty cooed, and when Updike gave peals of euphonious giggles, he mock-gasped. “We agree on somethin’!”

“ sh*te . Gonna… greater your good…”

“What the silly f*ck did you just say.”

As Whitty squished his cheek close to him, Updike tried to piece together a response, his brain scrambling. “I was just- hmmm- You possess the… Hhhh? Bloody damp sponge.” Updike giggled to himself, and even after Whitty stopped the tickling, he still babbled between sporadic voice cracks, “Your skills- Your conversational - Your skills… Your- You… Snrk- Pfft- ”

Whitty deadpanned at Boyfriend and Girlfriend as Updike flopped into his arms, flooded with a torrent of squeaky snorts. Boyfriend gave a couple squeaky giggles of his own, to which Whitty teased, “You’re such a squeaky toy, Bee.”

“ Hey . You’re supposed to be tormenting Gabs!”

“Oh I don’t need to, but if you insist~” Whitty didn’t even move and Updike was already slapping a hand over his face to stifle incoming giggles.

Girlfriend whipped out her phone, playing a recording of Updike’s dying tea kettle noises. “Mind if I make a song out of this?”

After a long pause of Updike literally paling in response, Whitty dragged a hand down his face. “Gigs, you’re terrible at this.”

“Whoops. I meant, I was not going to make a song out of this, no siree!”

Boyfriend rolled his eyes and flopped against her shoulder, eyebrows furrowed when Updike wearily asked, “Do I… sound like that?” Updike fluffed his hair over his face. “...Should I… be louder? Or… quieter if you don’t like-?”

“You should be you,” Boyfriend cut in, hands adoringly over his cheeks. “It’s a sign of your comfort and vulnerability, and no matter what, it’ll be beautiful.”

Updike gave a breathy laugh that transitioned to a “sksksks” windex bottle noise when Girlfriend and Whitty both called Boyfriend a sap in response. Whitty winked at Updike, who stumbled his way back into Whitty’s lap. Alright. One final showdown.

Burying his face against Whitty’s hoodie, Updike still jolted when Whitty scribbled his fingers over his back, loudly gasping, “Oh no, I can’t find Gabriel! Guys, have you seen him around?”

Boyfriend and Girlfriend intensely stared at Updike before chirping in unison, “Nope~”

Whitty smirked when Updike oscillated between soft clicking machine gun laughs and dorky high-pitched squeals of delight. “Oh, whatever is that sound?”

“I dunno, but sounds like you’ve got it under control~” Girlfriend purred, while Boyfriend just observed Updike throwing his head back with bubbling giggles in adoration.

“wHITEHEHE-!”

“Oh that’s me. I wonder who’s callin’ me?” Whitty pouted, giggling as well when Updike wordlessly keysmashed at him, a mindless pile of giggles trying and failing to wipe away his mirthful tears. “What was that? I couldn’t hear it over the laughter!”

“Must’ve been the wind~” Girlfriend answered, nudging Boyfriend, who nestled against Whitty and took one of Updike’s hands, giving it two little squishes and smiling when it was returned, just to make sure Updike was still relatively in his right mind~

Whitty shrugged, not even giving Updike a glance while asking, “Hey Bee, what do you want for breakfast tomorrow?”

“You’re a menace to society,” Girlfriend joked while Boyfriend cheered about blueberry pancakes.

“Too bad, somebody already made that joke before,” Whitty chuckled, ignoring Updike jokingly dying with noises he didn’t even know he could make. “My dear Gigs~ Your originality is pathetic-”

“ You’re pathetic.”

Boyfriend chuckled as the two bantered, turning back to Updike, who instinctively tried to push Whitty’s tickling hands away. However, Updike was so exhausted at this point that he just adorably held Whitty’s hands while being wrecked with silent giggles.

Without warning, Whitty directly met Updike’s gaze, eyes piercingly intimidating and tickles in beat with his whisper, “ There you are, Gabriel Updike~ You look deliciously… helpless .”

Updike crumbled. “OKAY OKAY it tickles , LORD.”

The entire quartet laughed together, with Whitty pumping a gleeful fist because YES , that’s how it feels!

At Updike’s admission, Whitty stopped his tickling and cradled him while Girlfriend tapped her hearing aids and joked, “Wait, what did you just say? I didn’t hear you~”

Updike groaned, giving a half-assed garbled “tickle” before giggling when the trio dramatically gasped once more.

Patting Updike’s shoulder, Boyfriend teased, “Wait it tickles? I would hope so, but you’re ticklish ? Really~???”

After a couple of broken sputters from Updike, Girlfriend followed up with a dainty hand out, “Oh you’re so thoughtful. I was worried that despite all your ~thrashing and laughter~ it didn’t tickle, thanks for telling us, lots of love, boo~”

“Hmmm~? I thought you weren’t ticklish~?” Whitty added, his circular eyes gleaming with amusem*nt between his thrilling noises. “Aw, why did you lie to me? You’ve done it now, so heckin’ rude! Oh ho ho, you’re in big trouble now, mister~!”

None of the trio even moved an inch and Updike just snorted before wheezing so loud he went silent, blush matching the color of his hoodie.

“Annnd looks like I shut you up after all~?” Whitty hummed, plucking Updike up and flopping him back and forth before laughing, “Oh god you limp noodle . How were you so tense that WHOLE time we’ve known each other?”

Updike didn’t respond.

Whitty gently set Updike down, stabilizing him when he nearly toppled backward. “Whoa easy there. I think this is a good spot to stop, no?” Updike gave a small nod and cough, wincing and cupping his hands over his ears, white eyes shaking as his breathing got shallower. “Are you…?”

“We’ll take it from here,” Boyfriend murmured, scooching Whitty away while Girlfriend kept Updike upright with her powers and handed him his inhaler. Oh.

Despite respectfully being hands-off, Girlfriend still helped Updike position and press down on the inhaler when Updike was a bit too disoriented to get it right the first time around. When his breathing still wasn’t getting much better, Girlfriend’s eyes gleamed red for a moment.

She glanced back at Boyfriend, confirming, “It’s now your specialty.”

Boyfriend nodded, inching over and sitting next to Updike. “Hey Gabs, can you hear me?” Updike’s dazed gaze flittered over to him. “Would you like a hug?”

Updike immediately flopped against him.

While Boyfriend supported Updike, giving wordless little reassurance noises and nudging Updike’s inhaler away when he dropped it, Girlfriend dragged Whitty out of there for the time being to get aftercare supplies.

“-safe. You’re gonna be alright. Deep breaths,” Boyfriend comforted, leaning back to rest the back of his hand against Updike’s forehead, blinking when Updike’s eyes actually focused on him. “Oh hey Gabs, you back with me?”

Updike silently grabbed Boyfriend’s hand to give it two little squishes, glancing around when Boyfriend beamed. “Where-?” Updike gave a small rattly cough, sporting a weak smile as Boyfriend reached out and rubbed his back. “I’m okay. Where are the others?”

“Did someone call for moi?” Girlfriend exclaimed while leaning against the kitchen door frame, with Whitty peeking over and waving at Updike a moment later.

Updike rubbed at his cheeks, which were aching from giggling too much, and when he unthinkingly stood up to greet them, his knees buckled like jello. Crumbling against Boyfriend while Whitty rushed over, Updike gave a shudder as adrenaline jitters flooded him.

After Whitty wrapped a warm blanket around him to muffle his touch sensitivity, Updike literally collapsed across the pillows with shaky breaths, a hand over his flushed face as the sinking feeling of vulnerability drained his energy. He felt Whitty’s hand resting against his shoulder before being withdrawn when Boyfriend proposed they give him some personal space and Girlfriend joked about him being too tickled silly to be coherent.

Whitty stepped away, hugging Boyfriend instead as Girlfriend flipped on a comfort movie to entertain them in the meantime.

Updike dropped his hands, lifting his head a little to ascertain what they were watching. His head immediately thudded against the closest pillow, lolling to the side and tousling his hair all over his face.

He stared at the ceiling, eyes half lidded and dazed with residual giggles. His nerves were on fire, tingling and buzzing all over, while his brain was a puddle of mush , all blissed out with giddiness.

As the lightheadedness from blushing too much began fading away, Updike fiddled with the edge of his blanket, scooping up his inhaler once more. He… didn’t know that would happen. Much less the dissociation that followed.

The trio turned to him.

“...Oh, I said that out loud?” Updike, still curled in a bed of pillows, rested a hand on his forehead. “Hh. I am… out of it.”

“You could say your mind is… cloudy~ Maybe how we… took your breath away~” Boyfriend joked, and this time everyone groaned in response. Updike still gave a breathless huff of amusem*nt, clutching his stomach when it ached at the excess motion, glancing off when Boyfriend noticed. “Whoops, sorry!”

“You’re good.” Updike took a deep breath and snapped his fingers as Girlfriend turned off her movie, leaving all of them in deafening silence. “I do… not think I said it yet, but… red. I’m done for the day.”

Boyfriend wriggled out of Whitty’s grasp with a finger gun. “Thanks for letting us know!”

Updike heaved into a sitting position, nearly toppling again if Whitty didn’t grab his arm. After Whitty made sure Updike was sitting upright by himself and backed off once more, Updike asked, “So… I did not know I could get an asthma attack from laughing.”

“It won’t happen for shorter durations,” Girlfriend answered, hovering a cup of freshly made green tea into Updike’s hands. “Your body also just… isn’t used to laughing, as sad as that sounds.”

“...My apologies-”

“Absolutely not,” Whitty cut in, crossing his arms when Updike faltered in place.

Hands trembling for a moment, Updike grumbled, “I ruined your fun-”

“I’m not goin’ to, but I really want to tickle you so you shut up once more,” Whitty lightheartedly answered before glaring at Updike. “But fine, go ahead. Argue your points. Try me.” Boyfriend and Girlfriend exchanged an amused glance.

“I… broke down-”

“You think we don’t got issues? To say we wouldn’t understand is an insult. In fact, we appreciate you knowin’ your limits and usin’ the safeword, especially considerin’ you aren’t used to it.”

Updike stared at his tea. “But I… overstepped. I was trying to cheer you guys up-”

“What, you think if you’re havin’ a good time, we aren’t? And what made you think you didn’t ? You literally got us through the storm.” Before Updike could respond, Whitty waved a hand. “You think I didn’t already forgive you for oversteppin’? You jest .”

“But-!” Updike cut himself off this time around, wincing when his voice cracked from hoarseness. He defeatedly sipped his tea before flushing and whispering, “My… noises aside… did you expect a bigger reaction out of me?”

“...What.” Whitty’s ironically cold demeanor melted into concern. “No? We didn’t even anticipate you laughin’, period .”

Updike raised a hand to run through his disheveled hair before dropping it in exhaustion. “So when I did laugh, I should have been… more… I dunno, expressive? Loud?”

“No???” the trio all answered, with Boyfriend in particular continuing, “We’re happy with your laughs because they’re genuine. They… were genuine, right?”

Despite his furrowed eyebrows and who knows what he was thinking, Updike nodded, trying and failing to hide his growing blush with his teacup.

“...Whether you need more time to be comfortable with expressin’ yourself, or you’ll never be that expressive, we are gonna judge you for it,” Whitty comforted, hovering a hand over Updike’s shoulder before taking it back.

“I… think you mean we aren’t gonna judge,” Boyfriend said, chuckling when Girlfriend yeeted a blanket at Whitty’s face.

“Wait sorry what’d I say???”

Girlfriend rolled their eyes, making sure Updike was feeling comfortable before flicking at Whitty’s cheek. “I think you’re out of it as well. TLDR, you did great Gabe. We could all improve, sure, but you don’t have to feel bad about what has happened.” The room temperature suddenly shot up as Girlfriend turned to Updike with fire in their eyes. “It wasn’t your fault.”

Updike swirled his teacup, burritoing himself in his blanket. “...‘Improve’?”

“There is? ARE??? so much stuff to improve on,” Whitty intensely grumbled, draping his blanket around his shoulders and rubbing at his eyelids. “Talk about what we should and shouldn’t do in the future. We are NOT talkin’ about it.”

“You missed the second not there, Whits.”

“Huh…?”

At Whitty’s weary expression, Updike couldn’t help but tease, “How are you more knackered than me ?” Boyfriend raised an eyebrow at Whitty, green eyes flashing as he held his hand. Updike narrowed his eyes. “Did you… also have a mental breakdown.”

“I took care of it!” Girlfriend chirped, eliciting amused sweatdrops from everyone there.

Whitty literally nodded off for a split moment before jolting back up, intensely staring at Updike with who knows what running through his mind. Updike finished his tea, giving a small thank you when Girlfriend whisked his teacup away before saying, “For Whitty’s sake as well, let’s talk about all of this tomorrow.”

“But-” Whitty cut himself off with a wince.

Boyfriend sprung to his feet, slinging an arm over Girlfriend’s shoulder. “You two can sort out the details of what to talk about, sounds like a personal thing, and the two of us will save our talks with you, Gabriel, for tomorrow. How’s that sound?”

When Updike and Whitty nodded, the couple shuffled across the room. Boyfriend asked Girlfriend whether she wanted to stay over as the two of them teleported away in the most dramatic poof of pink confetti.

Whitty flopped across the pillows, stretching so he pulled out some wholegrain crackers and roasted edamame from the coffee table drawers. He tossed the packets to Updike, groaning and faceplanting when they pathetically landed halfway.

Updike placed a hand over his smile, tearing the packets open and pouring some for Whitty when he dragged himself over on his stomach.

The two introverts munched in silence for a few moments.

“How… are you feelin’?” Whitty finally asked, popping a full cracker into his mouth to avoid getting crumbs over the pillows. He tapped his fingers together when Updike shrugged. “I… feel bad about pushin’ you too far-”

“Absolutely not,” Updike echoed, holding an edamame by the packaging so he wouldn’t get his hands dirty. “You were so, so good at checking in with me.”

Whitty rolled onto his back. “Not enough it seems. I basically caused your breakdown-”

“It was… scary, but not because I was scared of you, so if you think I blamed you, I will kick your ass tomorrow.”

“...Yea you probably could,” Whitty chuckled as a compliment, resting his hands behind his head and exhaling. “I still could have checked in more.”

Updike’s cheeks adorably squished as he munched on a bean. “Let’s save the details of that for tomorrow. In the meantime…” He hesitantly peeked over and patted Whitty’s head, tapping three times as if telling him to shut up. “I had a good time. Everything you said and did? It was a fun experience.”

Humming in affirmation, Whitty rocketed into a sitting position when noticing the tears pricking at Updike’s eyes. “Gabriel-”

“My apolog- I… am sorry.” Updike set down his snacks, too tired to even cover his face or let his tears fall. “My body might have objected, but my mind enjoyed it, truly . I… am not used to that.”

Whitty melted . “Aw nooo, you sound so vulnerable!” He mock-cried alongside Updike, opening his arms for the shaking floofball. “Do you want cuddles or do you need a minute?”

Updike intensely stared at the ground before making grabby hands at Whitty, a pillowy fluff of trust being worth it. Whitty chuckled, scooping Updike back into his lap, voice muffled when snuggled against his hair, “God, you’re so cute.”

“...I thought I was deadly.”

“Mmm that too.” Whitty smirked when Updike’s face heated up, fuse curling into a heart shape. “Aw, you feelin’ blue?”

Updike deadpanned at Whitty, flopping his face against his hoodie as if headbutting him. After some more check-ins, Whitty gave Updike firm back rubs, soothing his aching and numbing his tingling.

As lo-fight started emanating from him, Updike hugged one of Whitty’s arms. Whitty’s hoodie sleeves were still rolled up, so Updike unthinkingly traced a finger along his stretch marks in curiosity.

Whitty’s chest rumbled from laughter.

“Ticklish, hmmm~?”

“Oh shut up.” Whitty squished down in his hoodie before hissing, “I am taller and stronger than you. I could easily overpower you.”

“Yeah.” Updike’s wonky smile turned to a smirk as he innocently beamed. “But would you~?”

Within a second, Whitty’s entire face lit up in amber flames. After smooshing Updike’s hair, Whitty pulled his hood over his face with a heavy sigh confirming no. Updike would have swung his legs like a schoolgirl if he had the energy for it.

“Y’know… I had fun too,” Whitty admitted, poking his head out from under his hood to bump his forehead against Updike’s. “You handled it well, and it’s nice, to see you happy like that.”

“You looked happy too. You did… a great job.”

“And yet you call me a sap,” Boyfriend fondly chimed in, a smile bright enough to rival Whitty and Updike’s blushes when teleporting back alone. “Also in case you were wondering, Gf went home.”

Whitty opened his mouth to respond, only to give a loud yawn. “Mmm, well that’s a runnin’ trend.”

Catching the yawn as well, Updike rubbed at his eyelids, not even commenting on Boyfriend cooing at them being eepy bois. “She just left, huh? Didn’t even say bye.”

Boyfriend and Whitty shared a snicker, the former saying, “She does what she pleases. I’ve already accepted that no matter how much we love each other, we’re gonna be living separately.” Updike gave a thoughtful hum, blinking when Boyfriend continued, “I think we should all get some rest. You don’t have to worry about brushing your teeth, Gf took care of that too.”

Updike was too tired to question it.

In fact, Updike was too tired to even keep his head up, hands shoved in his hoodie pockets as he flopped back against Whitty’s hoodie.

“Yeah. You two should try to sleep in. There’s also a frog warming- fog warning -”

Boyfriend and Whitty blurted in unison, “ ‘Frog warming’ ?” with Boyfriend even jokingly tsking, “Wow, your brain fog really is bad.”

Updike groaned. “Listen, my nerves still feel raw . Could I… sleep alone?”

“Sure! One last kiss for the night?” Whitty asked, to which Updike rolled his eyes, nodding while still slumped against him.

Whitty leaned in for a forehead kiss through Updike’s blanket, resuscitating him for a moment through stammers. When Updike slumped once again, his ghost comically escaping, Boyfriend patted Whitty’s head. “Alright Whits, leave him alone.”

“Yea yea, night.”

After Boyfriend gave Whitty a forehead kiss as well, Whitty plopped Updike in Boyfriend’s arms before faceplanting with snores.

“...Oh dear.”

Boyfriend snorted, adjusting his grip on Updike before noticing the way Updike winced. “He’s fine, I’ll drag him to his bed later. You should be resting your vocal cords, Gabs. I’ll make honey tea tomorrow if you’d like!”

Updike signed a small thank you, not just for that. His eyes drooped, head weakly bobbing with each of Boyfriend’s steps. Boyfriend pressed a plushie into his hands. Aw.

Not even processing it, Updike leaned his head closer and kissed Boyfriend’s forehead before slipping into darkness.

The tickles were like the storm that passed. The electrifying intensity always pittered out to playful pecks of rain, an upheaval of routines but a fresh slate for growth.

Updike donned a wobbly smile even in his sleep.